I watched Spice World the other day.
Before you judge me for my terrible taste in films, hear me out.
I just wanted to know if it was as good as I remember it. Like when you think “surely, going on the slip-n-slide is just as awesome now as when I was a kid”, and then you do it, and you almost break your ass-bone and realise that nothing is as good as it appears in the glow of reminiscence.
Except, Spice World is every bit as good as I remembered.
Here’s why, though.
It’s not because it’s actually a good film. Victoria Beckham may be a very talented fashion designer, but she is the Official Worst Actor On The Planet (it’s an award I’ve just made up and given to her).
The storyline is both predictable and confusing. The movie is full of lame jokes and plot holes (what the HELL is that scene with the aliens?).
But it just looks like so much fun to be a Spice Girl.
And watching the film has made me realise; I’ve yet to accept that it is possible, quite possible, I will NOT be a Spice Girl when I grow up.
In fact, there’s a whole wealth of things I was dying to be when I was little, which I devastatingly have NOT become.
Despite the fact that I’m 28 and pretty comfortable with my choice of career (UNICORN. No, wait. Actor.) I still dream about being a dolphin trainer at Sea World.
Everybody wanted to be that at some stage, surely. Very few people actually went through with it. I remember when I was in grade four, we found out that to be best friends with dolphins every day at a marine park, you had to do all kinds of study and training and blah blah blah way to take the fun out of it blahhhh. Pfft. No thanks.