sex

"What's the weirdest thing you've wanked to?" We asked Abbie Chatfield 14 wildly inappropriate questions.

At Mamamia, we love nothing more than a candid chat. We have them all the time - whether that be on podcasts, in articles, around the office and, in this case, when on the phone to Abbie Chatfield.

If you're not a follower of Abbie on Instagram (seriously, get on that quick), then you won't know that the ex-Bachelor star is far from afraid of a loose chat. She doesn't shy away from 'controversial' topics like sex, masturbation, body image, therapy and vaccinations. In fact, she actively starts a bunch of these conversations - and for that, I absolutely adore her.

Quick watch: How are women having sex? The juiciest results from the Mamamia Sex Survey. Post continues after video.


Video via Mamamia. 

For that reason, when I was offered a phone call with Abbie, you can bet I lined up every sex question that crossed my mind. Because if a sex editor and a sex toy creator can't have a 'professional' conversation about this, who can?

So, without further ado, here's every wildly inappropriate question I asked Abbie Chatfield, and the brilliantly chaotic conversation that followed. 

What was the first sex toy you ever used? And what would you rate it out of 10?

Abbie: Oh my god, it was one of those pink bunny ear ones made of silicone... but the kicker was the vibrations got stronger with noise. So the louder you moaned or played music, the buzzing got harder. Like, you could f**k yourself to music!

I think it was quite an unnecessary feature, to be frank, but I picked it up from a little random sex store when I was 18. I would rate it a four out of 10, but if you'd asked me back then when I was first using it I would say a 10 out of 10 - because your first sex toy is always exciting, right?!

Just in case you're on the hunt for your first sex toy, take a look at this article for the best Mamamia recommendations. 

Image: Mamamia.  

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What's the dirtiest request you've ever gotten in your DMs?

Abbie: I don't even get that many! I get like the 'hello beautiful angel darling, come and visit me and my wife' vibes and I have gotten a rogue dick pic here and there...

Actually, the one that stands out to me is someone sent me a photo of him sitting on the toilet with his dick in his hand. On an open toilet! Of course, I replied saying 'let's get married'. Only joking! I never reply to dirty DMs from strangers. 

Do the people you're sleeping with expect you to whip out your sex toy in the bedroom?

Abbie: Yeah, there's been a joke or two about it for sure. I do bring it with me when I travel though, so it's always in the suitcase for when I need - and most people have seen it. 

...But I think people think I have a lot of sex. I don't have that much sex! Since moving to Bondi I've only had sex maybe 10 times with like two or three people. People think I'm f**king left, right and centre, and I'm like, I WISH!

Lockdown has really f**ked me up.

Speaking of, you gave yourself a porn ban during lockdown. So, what's the weirdest thing you've wanked to?

Abbie: A 2017 festival set featuring the Donna Summer song 'Love To Love You Baby'. Things had gotten out of control in that regard. 

Though, basically any musician or the thought of an ex-boyfriend kissing me will usually get me going. 

Listen to Abbie talk through one of her funniest dating diaries on The Undone. Post continues after podcast. 

Has your sexual imagination gotten better since you banned porn?

Abbie: Yeah, I think so. I think it's made me realise what I actually am into a little bit more. It lets me see where my mind goes, rather than being like, 'I'm watching this porno and that happens to be happening, so therefore I guess I'll enjoy it.' 

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Pre-ban, what was your go-to porn category?

Abbie: Honestly, lately, it's been bisexual threesomes. Like two men and a girl. That's been the most recent fave. 

What is your most embarrassing personal sex story?

Abbie: I've spoken about my worst one on my podcast (It's A Lot Pod) where I was doing anal and the guy who I was having sex with pulled his dick out and there was this little blob that I honestly thought was a grape, and I picked it up and... it wasn't a grape.

It was because we were using anal beads, and they have little rolls in them and it basically creates a little reindeer poo ball.

Thank God it was with someone I have had sex with a million times before, so he thought it was f**king hilarious!

On that topic, what is one thing everyone should know about anal before diving into it butt first?

Abbie: You have to ease your way into it! 

When I was younger, I absolutely hated anal because it hurt so much. But the way that I got into it was by masturbating with anal toys by myself. 

When you do it with a partner, you're s**tting yourself - for lack of a better term! But when you practice first by yourself and get used to the feeling and what you like with it, then when you do it with a partner you probably won't hate or be so scared and terrified. The sensation is still strange, but it's worth it!

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Snap decision: Who's better in bed, men or women?

Abbie: Women. I mean, obviously. 

I haven't had heaps of opportunity to research though, because I've only really gotten into my bisexually since f**king coronavirus kicked in. Things were on a roll, but yeah, if we're going off my sample size - women are just killing it. 

If you had to credit one single thing with boosting your sexual confidence, what would it be?

Abbie: I'd have to say my ex-boyfriend.

Mainly because of my 'outie vagina' and him helping me love it. I was just so comfortable with him and loved him so much, and nothing sexual was off the table - so I never felt nervous to ask him about anything. We dated when I was 21, so I was coming into my own sexuality and it was good.

...but PSA, there was cheating and so he sexually boosted my confidence, but destroyed me mentally.

So I'd recommend therapy too. Friends and therapy. We're still on that self-worth journey, babe!

What's one thing you'd wish you'd known about sex before you started having it?

Abbie: That mutual masturbation is the hottest thing in the world. 

I met someone who suggested we masturbate together on his couch, and I was like 'no thanks' and now looking back, I think about it almost daily being like, damn I wish we did that. Now we're in lockdown and I feel like I missed my chance to masturbate with him - and he was so hot. 

What is the horniest thing you've done in lockdown?

Abbie: Gotten vaccinated? I mean, it's true!

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What's your top tip for anybody about to use the ABBIE x VUSH g-spot vibrator?

Abbie: I feel like my top tip would be to use it for all its functionality. Use it externally, use it internally, the lot. And actually, using it as a combo deal with the Abbie inside you and the Empress toy (which is a suction vibrator) on your clit. Nice. 

Will you be making another vibrator? Or have you made the holy grail of sex toys now and you're good to retire?

Abbie: We will have to see what the future holds, babe! I'd love to make another vibrator because it's so exciting to do. But if I do make another one, you'll be the first to know so I can ruin your vagina again!

...for context, this was not a threat but a loving reference to my review of Abbie's first sex toy where I plainly asked 'Abbie Chatfield, what have you done to my vagina?!'

If you want to get your hands/vagina on the ABBIE x VUSH g-spot vibrator, I have good news! The once sold-out sex toy has had a restock (yay!), so head to VUSH now before it sells out again. I won't tell you again. 

Feature Image: Mamamia + Vush. 

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