When in doubt, drink.

Any reality TV producer worth her salt knows that DRAMA is the aim of the game.

How does one create a veritable powder-keg of said drama? Just add alcohol to an already ridiculously contrived situation and reach for the popcorn.

Emily Simms, one of the ladies vying for The Bachelor ‘s Sam Woods’ heart and loins (isn’t loins the most disturbing word? Loins), reckons she knew she was on her way out during the regular Rose Ceremony cocktail fiasco and so decided to get herself shitfaced in preparation.

Emily is shocked and mortified at being called “highly strung”.

Great plan, lady! Show him what he’s missing out on.

“I had decided to walk out that morning. I told Ebru when we were in hair and makeup that I had had enough of the lies, the fake bullshit. I was at breaking point,” she wrote on Instagram.

Watch the DRAMATIC WALK-OUT right here… Post continues after video.

“I just wanted to go home. So I decided to get myself blind drunk (you can see me slurring my words in the car), and numb myself from it.”

That’s very interesting, Emily Simms, considering you said you were certain you’d make it to the top two in that same episode.

“So I says to Sam, I says…wait, what was I saying?” Emily Simms reckons she was drunk during last night’s Bach.

Simms stormed out before she could be rejected by Woods during the Rose Ceremony, thereby achieving her lifelong goal of never being dumped, ever.

The tanty occurred after Woods told her she’s “highly strung”. What a crazy thing to say. Highly strung people don’t just get wasted and storm out of things.

She also wrote on Instagram that Woods had behaved “poorly”.

Happier times.

If by poorly she means having 20 girlfriends at the SAME TIME then I would be inclined to agree.

Simms appeared on the show of respected radio broadcasters Kyle and Jackie O this morning to emphasise her two points: she was drunk and Sam isn’t very nice.

“Don’t take everything at face value. Not everyone who comes across as sweet as pie, are sweet as pie,” she said.

Click through our The Bachelor gallery to see more of Emily…

The Bachelor Season 3.

The Bachelor 2015.

Bec.

The one who's barely said anything but apparently pashed Bachie Wood at a piss up in Bali one time.

Ebru.

Part of the ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ pile.

Emily.

Emily - pitched as Wifey material, but not as Laid Back and Cool as Heather.

Heather.

Totally Laid Back Cool Girl Heather.

Jacinda.

Jacinda - The poor man's Sandra. Bachie loves her like a sister.

Jasmin.

The one who's never had a boyfriend. Jasmyn maybe?

Jessica.

Part of the ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ pile. GONE.

Joni.

Budget Oprah. GONE.

Krystal.

Part of the ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ pile. GONE.

Laura.

Dr. Anal Glands. GONE.

Madeleine.

The girl with no bum hole. GONE.

Nina.

Part of the ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ pile.

Rachel.

Part of the ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ pile.

Reshael.

The one who was scared of Sandra. GONE.

Sandra.

Sandra. Possibly a plant. But a very entertaining one.

Sarah.

Sarah. There is literally nothing interesting about her that can be put in this description.

Snezana.

Parmigiana. Has daughter called Chicken.

Tess.

Homeless Woodchopper. GONE.

Zilda.

Part of the ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ pile. GONE.