sex

'After six years as Australia's top escort, I know the number one thing men want in bed.'

Samantha X is a former escort with over six years of experience in the sex work industry and the star of Mamamia’s new sex podcast, Sealed Section. 

Did you know that most of my clients requested kissing over porn star sex?

Do you know most men don’t even KNOW what ‘porn star sex’ really is, and would run a mile if you pulled out a strap-on the size of an arm?

Most people would assume after my six or so years as an escort, I would hate men. I’d be so over them right? They are all liars, cheaters, and all they want is a quick shag then they’re out the door.

You would think because I know all their secrets, they would repulse me. I would have zero respect for them.

False.

I don’t hate men, I love them.

Like a puppy chewing your shoes, you can’t hate them. You just need to guide them and understand them. I know what they want, in bed and out of it. And the golden nuggets I’ve learned have surprised me and will more than likely surprise YOU.

The number one thing men want in bed?

It’s not wild dirty sex, Pornhub style. It’s not a blow job so deep he can feel what you had for dinner. It’s not anal. (Thank God.)

It’s foreplay. It’s knowing how to turn YOU on. It’s giving YOU pleasure and making your toes curl and your cheeks flush. Men are about ego. Once they know you’re having a good time thanks to their bedroom skills; they will have a good time.

And guess what that means? You need to know what turns you on.

Yep.

You need to get to know your own body. Don’t crinkle your nose! There is nothing embarrassing about that! If you can explore someone else’s body, then you can darn well explore your own. How the hell is he supposed to know what to do to make you orgasm, when you have no idea?!

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I have a theory – no one is ‘bad in bed’. But they are lacking in communication skills. If you don’t want to be lying there while he jackhammers away, tell him. If you don’t like it that he says ‘Oh Mummy,’ when he climaxes, tell him (please tell him). You are responsible for your sex life, only you.

Don’t expect him to be a mind reader.

Here’s the thing. I am supposedly a sex expert. Having dipped my toe in Australia’s secret escorting world, and having spent hours and hours listening to the woes of men in my lingerie, I think I know my stuff. But even the word ‘sex’ makes me blush. Why is that?

Women talking about sex is a complex thing isn’t it? It’s private, it’s embarrassing, it’s full of guilt and shame – and we all have different ideas of what ‘normal’ is, which is exactly why we need to be more open about it.

‘Sex is natural, sex is good, not everybody does it, but everybody should.’ Wasn’t it George Michael who sang those words in I Want Your Sex? He was right – it is natural, it can be good, and I think as women, we sometimes forget we are supposed to be enjoying it too, minus the shame.

So listen up. No, I mean literally listen up.

The Sealed Section podcast, with yours truly and sex guru Dr Lauren Rosewarne, will do the talking with you. We will be the ones confessing our sexy secrets, mulling over those tricky questions that you may not want to speak to your nearest and dearest about.

All you have to do is listen.

Subscribe to Sealed Section in iTunes, Stitcher, or wherever you get your pods.