couples

"Don't judge me, but... I won't be giving my friend a wedding present."

Yes, I’m holding a grudge, but I have a right to.

We all have a friend like the one I am about to describe.

She is the money hoarder of the group. The one who at the end of a shared meal says, “But I only had one slice of garlic bread, so I shouldn’t have to pay the same as those who had two”.

Yep, that one.

And look, for the most part I can set my annoyance with her aside. But now… I can’t. Now is my time to get my own back.

She’s getting married in June. She found someone as equally stingy as her and they are going to spend the rest of their lives together being the couple no one wants to go to dinner with.

And she just sent out her wedding invite. She’s having her lovely wedding in Byron Bay. She’s given her wedding guests a whole two months to book flights/organise accommodation/take leave to be at her wedding (held on a Wednesday).

"She's given her wedding guests a whole two months to book flights/organise accommodation/take leave to be at her wedding (held on a Wednesday)." Image via iStock.
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In her invite, she's graciously included a wedding gift registry. It's from one of those fancy boutique wedding stores where they have ridiculously expensive things. And only ridiculously expensive things.

The minimum present is worth $250.00.

Now before I rant about the wedding registry, let me tell you a bit more about my friend.

When another friend of mine got married, I was the self-appointed organiser of the wedding gift. We all decided to combine our money so that we could get her and her husband a spa day at their honeymoon resort. Everyone gave me the money. Except the stingy friend. She still hasn't paid me. That was 2 years ago.

We all turned 30 last year. She didn't buy one person a birthday present. Not even a bunch of flowers. But was more than happy to come along to the celebrations and have the champagne whenever someone else was shouting.

And when I got married a year ago, she didn't buy us a wedding present.

I know it's petty, and my husband just tells me to be the bigger person, bite the bullet and buy the $250.00 present.

No, why should I have to? Why should I have to buy someone a wedding present, when they clearly don't buy anyone else anything? Why should I buy her a present when I am already going to drop a couple hundred going to her wedding - especially with such short notice?

"I got a box of nothing, why should I get her something?" Image via iStock.
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I asked a few of my friends what they are doing. They are all biting the bullet and buying her a gift. But I think it is so hypocritical. We all complain that she is stingy and inconsiderate. We all know she didn't buy me or our other friend a wedding gift. So why does she deserve one from us?

Not to mention it is bloody rude to have the cheapest thing on your gift wedding registry to be $250.00.

My husband even said why don't we just buy her something small, not from her wedding gift registry. But I don't even want to do that. She barely deserves our money, much less my effort in finding her a present.

Am I being petty? Or am I completely within reason not to buy her a gift?

If, like this reader, you have a dilemma that you would like advice about, please email info@themotherish.com with Don’t Judge Me in the subject field. You will be contacted before publication, and your identity will be protected.

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