Remember when 40 was old?
Not only old, but really, really uncool. But now that I am 6 months away from that number myself, I feel neither old or uncool. But you know, self-reflection is not really one of my strong points.
But I am starting to see a definite divide opening up between being 30 and 40. Hell, even 35 and 40 seem to contrast spectacularly. In fact, there are several things that only women who are at the door of 40 and beyond will understand.
Long hair probably no longer really works for you anymore.
I’ve had long hair since I’ve had the ability to make my own decisions. My mother used to keep it short, probably because it was curly, a mess and a complete fucking nightmare to brush. I though, sick of being referred to as a boy, grew it the minute I could and have not cut it since. But lately, I’ve started to admire the ladies walking past me with short locks. They look like they have their shit together and they are aren’t, like me, embarrassingly trying to hang on their long-lost youth. And you know, let’s not even get started on the greys.
You become invisible.
Now, I’m not talking about just turning heads on the street here, I mean, standing at a bar on a Friday afternoon, simply trying to get a wine for you and your friend and being TOTALLY overlooked and ignored. Sometimes, especially lately, I’ve started to feel like I’m in The Sixth Sense and actually questioning if I’m dead and no one can see me. Surely that’s the reason the only people who see me are those dead sea skin mineral people in shopping centres..
Your friends start to divorce
I call this The Splintering. When I was 30 and one of my good friends was 40, she warned me. She said to me, “Just you wait, when people who are married hit 40, even the solid ones, they ask you over and announce that they are getting a divorce”. She was so right.
You might also like: “The upside of divorce is getting rid of your spouse.”
Your body starts to breakdown.
Oh, so you you’ve not had a bad back before? Never known the pain of a sore knee? Not experienced annoying and constant reflux? Don’t know what your cholesterol level is? Well you’re in for a TREAT because shit is about to get real. Now I’ve been one of those lucky bitches who has not ever had a sore back, I eat a lot of bad food, drink loads of alcohol and exercise intermittently but still maintain a fairly good physique and my blood tests have all come back perfect. This last year however has shown me that not only am I not invincible, I’ve been a flagrant idiot.