real life

NICKY: Here comes the bride, there go her friends.

Church vs beach wedding. Big ceremony vs elopement. Gift registry vs wishing well. Cocktail vs sit down reception. Chocolate mud cake vs traditional fruitcake. Veil vs no veil. Deejay vs band. Peonies vs every other flower that exists.

There are so many decisions you have to make as a bride but none so challenging* as choosing who will be in your bridal party.

When the rumours began to circulate today that Jennifer Aniston ‘has announced’ her bridesmaids for her up-coming wedding to Justin Theroux, we were naturally obsessed mildly curious.

In Aniston’s first wedding to Brad Pitt she had just two bridesmaids: actress Andrea Bendewald and documentary filmmaker Kristin Hahn-Stringer.

So surely this time round Aniston would include her BFF and Friends co-star Courteney Cox? Actually no, the 44-year-old Aniston has reportedly chosen stand-up comedian Chelsea Handler and actress Emily Blunt.

Wait a second; Jennifer Aniston and Emily Blunt are friends? How did this escape our attention?

According to Heatworld magazine (which is not at all a reliable source but stick with it) Aniston hasn’t snubbed Cox, she just wanted to include some of her new “fiercely loyal” friends.

Chelsea Handler has hit out at Angelina Jolie for years in her stand-up routine.

“She’s a home wrecker, she is,” Chelsea said back in 2010. “She can rescue as many babies from as many countries as she wants to. I don’t f**king believe you. She gives interviews, ‘I don’t have a lot of female friends.’ Because you’re a…f**king b***h!”

[While we are not in any way endorsing the abuse of Angelina by Chelsesa, she does kind of have a point about Jolie not appearing to have any female friends….ever seen her with one?]

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Why wouldn’t you want Handler as your chief bridesmaid? Actually scratch that, you’d want her as your MC.

Choosing bridesmaids for my own wedding was a political minefield. I could either have just my best friend or have six bridesmaids. All of my friendship circles; school friends, uni friends, work friends each had five girlfriends and to split them up seemed mean.

In the end I went for the low-key option of having my best friend as my one maid of honour, it meant our bridal party had an uneven number (my husband had a best man and two groomsmen) but I just didn’t want the drama that comes with having a large bridal party.

Luckily, my husband didn’t have any sisters, because I think you have to include them too, don’ t you? What if they have three or four sisters? And if you’ve been a bridesmaid for someone, is it really rude not to reciprocate?

People lose their shit over this stuff. Friendships are ruined. Noses get out of joint.

Honestly, I don’t know why people get so upset. Attending a wedding as a guest rather than being part of the bridal party means you get all the fun without the responsibility. You don’t have to give a speech, you don’t have to wear an ugly dress, no one minds if you get tipsy before the entree is served and  IT’S CHEAPER.

*actually, that depends entirely on your mother-in-law.

We wonder how many of these bridesmaids were thrilled to be chosen (click through for a laugh):

If you’re married how did you choose your bridesmaids? If you’re single have you already chosen your bridesmaids? And if you’ve been married more than once did you have the same bridesmaids the second time around?