Phew. We’re back to opening on the beach this week.
Something about watching Tim stare out at the horizon while he contemplates life just feels right.
And he finally admits to the beach/thinking connection that we’ve known was there since week 1: “Salt water just helps me clear my head,” he says. “I’m usually a person that thinks a lot with my head.”
Well, you’re not the only one Timmy.
Oh, wait – he’s still going: “My head is just all over the place.” Well, maybe that’s because he hasn’t taken the time to do his serious beach thinking the last few weeks’ episodes. Hopefully this extra-long sesh will regenerate his brain.
Cut to the remaining seven girls doing what all women do when they’re alone together: frolicking in the sea and throwing a Frisbee around, while dressed in their bikinis.
Osher decides that this is the perfect moment for him to show up with something they’re all willing to pounce on him for: the single date card. Ali is staking her claim early. In a private moment with the camera she says she WILL get some alone time with Tim this week. You can tell by her face that she means it. Crazy eyes has returned!
Rochelle gets the one-on-one. Ali is devastated and completely unable to hide it, although she does manage to get her emotions in check before the sea rises up in fury behind her. (She may or may not have been training a giant death squid with vials of her competitors’ blood.)
Rochelle’s magical date begins. Although before we touch base with our lovers, we need to give Tourism Broome their money’s worth in advertising with some picturesque establishing shots: beach, dead tree, desert, birds in sky, sprawling bush, lake, windmill.
That seems about right.
Rochelle and Tim are driving down a dirt road. Bird on branch. Boat on water. Another lake.
And we’ve arrived!
Apparently Tim and Rochelle are going pearling, which everybody’s hoping is a euphemism. We’re introduced to Dave the skipper, before he promptly disappears so that it looks like Tim is the one driving the boat because he is The Bachelor and The Bachelor is an expert in everything.
Ugh boring. They’re ‘getting to know’ each other. Talking talking grew up somewhere talking talking. All anybody wants to know is if this ‘pearling’ business is going to be a sex thing.
It’s not. It’s about finding pearls.
And apparently it’s really easy: You just walk over to the side of your boat and pull on the rope that’s waiting for you, and then a bunch of shells with pearls in them appear. All you have to do is open the shell. Geez, why are pearls so expensive?
Tim and Rochelle cling to each other, overcome with emotion at their unbelievable pearl-finding luck.
Back at the hotel, the girls are giggling and playing group tennis because that’s another thing that girls obviously do when they’re alone together. Osher appears with the group-date card. He explains to them that they need to open it and then read it.