real life

Group Therapy: Should I tell my friend her boyfriend is cheating?

 

Would you tell your friend their boyfriend is cheating on them?

 

 

 

 

Last week at a work function, I was told by a woman who I work with that about 12 months ago she had slept with a man named *Jon.

She was confiding in me, saying how bad she felt about the whole thing because Jon has a partner who he has been with for many years. That’s when things started to click in my brain.

You see, I know Jon. He is my boyfriend’s best friend and Jon’s partner *Emily and I have become very close.

Two years ago, Jon kissed another woman in front of me and my boyfriend. I never told Emily because her and I weren’t particularly close at that time and Jon begged me not to, saying that it was a drunken mistake that he felt terrible about.

My boyfriend confessed to me this past weekend that Jon actually hired a prostitute several months ago as well. I am feeling so torn about whether or not to call Emily and tell her.

On the one hand, Emily has become a very close friend. I have a deep sense of loyalty to her and I care about her so much. I know that she deserves someone better and I think deep down she knows as well. Also-what if Jon didn’t use protection and has passed on an STI? If I were in her shoes, I would want to know.

On the other hand, Jon and Emily have had a very dramatic relationship over the years and being an active observer/shoulder to cry on it is my personal belief that they are unlikely to make it in the long run-Jon has many deep rooted issues and Emily has told me that it is hard to see a future with him at the moment.

If I did tell, my boyfriend would likely lose his friendship with Jon (not a huge loss in my opinion but it’s his friend not mine) and Emily would be absolutely heart broken. She has been cheated on in the past with different boyfriends and I know this information would shatter her trust completely.

I don’t know if she would even believe me and I run the risk of having everybody hate me for ruining our group of friends.

Should I let this relationship die of natural causes or should I step in and give my friend all the information?

Over to you, MMers. Should Anonymous tell her friend that her boyfriend is cheating on her?