rogue

A woman found this very, very NSFW bucket list in a change room. What. The. Hell.

I’m so, so glad I’m not longer a teenager.

Remember the days when your goals were less to do with your mortgage or your fitness and more to do with getting a boob hickey?

Thanks to an unidentified US teen, we’ve been given a refreshing reminder about prioritising the little things in life; a lesson that comes courtesy of the summer holiday ‘bucket list’ she dropped in a changing room.

The full 41-point plan is below, but here are some highlights:

  • Have sex
  • Give two blow jobs
  • HU [hook up] with Jacob (again) [Checked]
  • Make a summer playlist (10 hours long)[Checked]
  • Get drunk all the time [Checked]
  • Pet a giraffe
  • Get a boob hickey
  • Giant water balloon fight
  • Buy seven bikinis

Shared to Twitter by a friend of the retail worker who found the note, it’s gone what the kids call ‘viral’. More than 50,000 likes, 13,000 re-Tweets.

Among the comments, many applauded the the teen’s ambition – “This person is living their best life”, wrote one; “I’m 50 and I’d probably have 75 per cent of these on a list if I made one,” added another.

Others questioned her priorities – “Girl needs to learn how to manage her list. Easy stuff first, build momentum. Eat the damn cotton candy. [Because] You may or may not find giraffe!”

And like us, plenty learned some new terms: “Darty”, anyone? “Cross faded”?

(FYI, according to young, cool people, a darty is a day party involving alcoholic beverages.

And apparently cross faded is the process of getting both drunk and high at once. Let’s remember the bucket lister wanted to do this 17 times, which sounds like a terrible idea. And tiring, also really tiring.)

When should you have ‘the talk’ with your teen? (Post continues below.)

Three days on from the list appearing online, the author’s identity still remains a mystery.

But the poster is hoping the internet will find her because she’s clearly “legit amazing” and might have forgotten the very important things she’s yet to knock over by summer’s end.

Besides, if she is found, several followers are prepared to chip in to help her make it happen.

Lord knows, seven pairs of cossies won’t come cheap.