UPDATE: An Australian study has found sexy pop music videos are having an effect on how young children dress and behave. Believe it or not, researchers from Adelaide studied what children up to Year 7 wore at their school disco and observed whether they were dancing ‘exotically’. The answer was: apparently pop music has a lot to answer for.
Well, I had the same thought:
The Hogsbreath Cafe is not my natural habitat. Generally, I’m not big on theme restaurants after overdoing it at The Hard Rock Cafe back in the 90s. And somehow, I’d always assumed the Hog in Hogsbreath referred to bikers, possibly confusing it with that other HOG – the Harley (Davidson) Owners Group.
It turns out the ‘hog’ is in fact pig-related. Had I been paying attention, I might have learned this from the restaurant chain’s logo which features an actual hog and no motorcycles at all.
So anyway, I recently found myself in a small coastal town with a gaggle of children who begged me to take them to the Hogsbreath for dinner. As the only adult in our party of six, I was apprehensive but game. Mostly though, I was hungry. From the moment we walked in, I was also pleasantly surprised. It was clean, great menu, well-priced. A family restaurant for people of all ages, is how they describe themselves on their website. Yep.
My cheeseburger was delicious. My glass of wine was hitting the spot. There were coloured pencils for the little kids. Curly fries. Life was good. Until.
“Is that what women do at the hairdresser?” asked one of the teenagers wryly, pointing to one of the many TV screens playing music videos.
I spun around to be greeted with the sight of spread legs. Six pairs of them, all belonging to Pussycat Dolls – the LA-based group of strippers turned popstars – who were inexplicably singing a song about ‘not needing a man’ while doing a seated dance routine at the hairdressers. Except their dance moves mostly involved pretending they had an invisible cricket bat clamped lengthways between their open knees.
In my own chair, I was not dancing. I was seething. Meanwhile all the kids at my table stared at the screens.
Suddenly, the clip changed to a close-up of one Pussycat Doll feeling her boobs with wild enthusiasm. “She’s checking for lumps,” I told the kids gravely. “Every woman must do that each month. It’s very important.”
Next, the women began running their hands over other body parts as if to make sure their internal organs were in place. “Good to be thorough when you check” I added.
And then the clip got worse. After checking their boobs, crotch and internal organs were all there, the Pussycat Dolls began pulling off their clothes. “All that lace must be very itchy” I explained to the kids. At this point, I noticed the song’s lyrics which were accidentally hilarious: “I don’t need a man to make me happy, I get off being free. I don’t need a ring around my finger, to make me feel complete” sang the Pussycat Dolls, dancing around in their knickers while fist pumping to the empowering idea that they don’t need a man.