Why did you choose to walk away?
Did you really just want your own space?
How could you just disappear?
Why did you cheat?
How could you cheat again when I took you back on your word that it was a one-off?
You held my hand in yours, with tears in your eyes, and begged me to take you back, then you did it again – how could you?
A painful breakup can mean fretful, sleepless nights as your mind churns through unanswered questions for months, even years.
And leaving those questions unanswered can be torturous.
We break up with exes for different reasons. Some breakups are harder than others - they involve more tubs of ice-cream, spark unattractive howling, and require at least two good girl friends who have a very high tolerance for hearing the same tune on loop.
And it's a common belief that without a civilised wrap-up conversation to tie a bow on the box and move on, they can leave you lugging around heavy baggage and make it extremely difficult to move on.
With that in mind, would you have one last conversation with your ex if you could?
A recent video made for ‘The And’ project sees a former couple do exactly that. Rather excruciatingly, the guy (Andrew) is asked by his ex-lover (Ali) why he cheated so many times.
They battle their way through the really tough, heavy stuff, almost re-connect, trouble flares again, and the video ends with her asking ‘Why do you still want to be friends, post-breakup?’
He says, ‘Because I miss you.’
Forget The Bachelor, this is proper heart-wrenching, raw, real viewing!
Watch the video below. Post continues after video.
But it kind of underlines in my mind that my feelings on this are very right.
I firmly believe in cutting ties.
When it’s really over, it’s gone. That’s not to say you don’t fight and fight your way over the inevitable bumps in the road in a relationship and try to stay in the same car.
But when you’ve hit the end of the road you can’t keep driving.