If I had a crystal ball 13 years ago, would I have changed the decisions I made?
Let’s start at the beginning.
In 2004, I met my soulmate on an online dating site. We clicked instantly, were married two years later, and things were great. In December 2008, our daughter Allegra was born she made our life complete.
Not even a week later, my husband was diagnosed with an aggressive form of non Hodgkin’s lymphoma. It was incredibly stressful and emotional, but he was in remission within six months. We all took a deep breath.
In October 2011 Allegra was diagnosed with moderate autism with a severe language delay. At the time, I didn’t know much about autism, all I knew is I had to help my daughter, so we started early intervention.
We managed, we got by, and we were happy.
In April of 2014, we were elated to find out we were pregnant with our second child – a boy – something we thought would never be possible due to the chemotherapy used to treat my husband’s cancer.
It should have been the happiest year of my life, and it ended up being one of my hardest. I was 34 weeks pregnant when my world was tipped upside down.
In November of that year, my husband passed away suddenly due to a heart condition; something the doctors say may have been caused by the cancer treatment he had received years prior. I felt completely lost.
My baby Harrison was about to enter a very different life – one that felt like a nightmare.
I was angry with the world for a long time, even though there was so much to be positive about. Becoming a widow at the age of 33 was definitely not in my plans, but destiny placed me in this position, and it has taken almost three years since my husband passing away to realise that sometimes, I just need to breathe, trust, let go, and see what happens.
Top Comments
Hats off and sincere wishes of luck to you, Lady.
Why don't ever post articles by ACTUAL autistic people? I have no sympathy for this mother moaning about how much of a burden her kids, fishing for sympathy. Why don't you ask an autistic mother to write about being a parent with autism? There are plenty out there.
Ouch
???? Nasty. If you are the "autistic mother", then write it. Otherwise accept that those of us who are parents of autistic children sometimes need to be reminded we are not alone and aren't looking for sympathy, however a bit of empathy doesn't hurt.
Oh look, it's a Massive Dick!
The amazing thing about empathy is that it is infinite. We can feel empathy for this mother as well as other people with both lesser and worse struggles. There is always someone worse off, but unless you want to find the most downtrodden person on the planet and say no one else is allowed to complain then let's not make it a competition.