User Comments

cadds July 3, 2022

The thing is that there are actually two issues here, and one is debt and the other is disclosure of the debt. So separate them. Telling him is about being reliable with money (and secrets). Crucially, you can tell him about the debt without him owing part of the debt if you make it clear that you will handle it.

You can say that you have a debt that predates him, so you and you alone will get rid of it. Then make whatever arrangements are required so that it doesn't affect him. If you have combined your finances, then you could each keep an allowance and you could use some of yours to pay the debt. If you have separate finances then just pay it off with your money that you control.

Credit card debt is expensive and best avoided. So it's in your best interests to get rid of it. If he knows, and is good with money, and doesn't feel that he's been suckered with half of it, he may help you in other ways (such as making your lunch too, or not wanting expensive outings, or money tips).

cadds June 30, 2022

I am very uncomfortable with aspects of this story. While there were 'precancerous cells' that is not cancer and she did not make an informed choice.  Were there other ways to deal with it? I don't know -but does she? The doctor basically barrelled her down a treatment path without any consultation or consent. This is not ok.

cadds May 11, 2022

The LNP has been in power since 2013. We have been in a pandemic since 2020. Deduct the cost of the pandemic and the increase in health spending, over than 9 year period, will not have even matched inflation, let alone addressed the population increase in that time (or the cost of new therapies). Ask a primary health care provider how they are doing.  That's the real test.

cadds January 21, 2022

For many many years - in fact, up until about the late nineties, if you chose to live in a country away from your family you resigned yourself to never seeing them again.  You might get back once, in the 20th Century, if you had a decent enough job.  Wide and frequent travel was for the rich.  And this is because, if you choose to live overseas, the chances are that you are a long long loooong way away if you have to travel by land or sea.  Only in the short era of cheap air tickets has nipping back for a week here and there been possible. And we've paid for that in accelerating global warming and climate change.

Mark McGowan is trying to save lives, and for me that totally trumps your right to drop back to see family.  And frankly, so does the impact on the environment. Maybe you didn't think that moving so far away would have this side effect - but you were making your decision based on a false baseline.

cadds November 6, 2021

I'm with Celeste.  Emily can't complain and cash in. Or at least, there's complain, cash in, and not be called out. You can have any two of the three.

cadds November 3, 2021

I was of the understanding that there was a proportional defence argument, where if a person is attacked is weaker than their attacker, they can argue that they were acting in self defence even if they pick up a weapon. How does this intersect with that?