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deniseeb August 19, 2020

In my family there is myself (of course!) and 2 teenage boys, a teenage daughter, my husband, 4 cats and a dog. I mention the animals because they fall into my grocery shopping trips. Each week I go to the grocery for a big run and pick up essentials like milk, bread, fruit, cat food/litter, etc. I am in the US and it usually runs about $475. I barely cover the basics on this run and it looks as if there is nothing in the fridge once I put it all away. I’m back at the store within two days spending $200-300 on more milk and eggs and dinner items, spending on average $775 a week at the grocery store  (again it always looks like we have nothing). That total does not cover runs to Starbucks or restaurant delivery which is another $150. In addition, since the pandemic I have “inherited” a few of my boys friends for dinner at least 3x per week. My husband gives me a set amount of money each week and that’s it. I am to pay for the gas in my car ($100 per week 1/2), my sons gas ($40 per week), groceries, the kids mad cash/allowance ($100 per week), any clothes, shoes, makeup, etc  for myself, and any credit card bills of my own. Here is the thing, I was able to get through each week pre-pandemic since I didn’t have the additional expense of constant mouths to feed!  We want our kids close and welcome their friends because I don’t want my kids getting into unnecessary trouble and would rather them here as opposed to hanging at their friends (allegedly). Obviously I’m a stay at home mom and my husband has his own company and we are (he is) financially stable and live a pretty amazing life. I am grateful and blessed but I am unable to keep this up and my husband is unable to see I am not being selfish. When I approach my husband about kicking up my weekly allowance (which hasn’t been adjusted for ten years when the kids were little) I am met with irritation by him and made to feel as if I am a selfish and money hungry witch. I’ve tried to provide spreadsheets to show him the costs and where everything is going and nothing. I’ve tried EVERY approach! My credit has taken a massive hit since I’m now unable to pay on the cards because i can barely make it through the week to feed my kids. Advice?