I could have easily written this & it’s like the author & I had been leading parallel lives. The profound similarities led me to read her other articles too & again, just blown away by the familiarity of my own now recently past situation. I was long confused over is it illness or is it abuse? And I wasted some of the best years of my life in a toxic marriage. Might I add throw in a good dose of malignant narcissism & its a recipe for utter chaos & destruction, so glad I’m out but still recovering - how I’ve even kept my sanity after the experience I’ve no idea...