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forward July 22, 2023

I read your first article and I was stunned at how close it hit to home. Those of us who have grieved this same never ending grief empathise with you and have also suffered the guilt and judgement that come with it.

You are not alone. You have done your best with the knowledge and capability you had at the time. Are you like me, absolutely cringing at some of the choices I made? I know so much better now and I would absolutely make some very different choices  but back then, I didn’t know and wasn’t able to make different choices.
Every single day I wake up with my dearly loved girls at the forefront of my mind and my heart. It is soul destroying to know they are easily reachable but do not want me in their lives. They are still being influenced by people with very strong agendas of their own.
I do not find their choices fair or acceptable but I respect their rights to do as they feel best. I worry that living with hate and anger will ultimately harm them but hope they will get the help and support they need. …and no matter what, I will, always and forever love them.

forward August 2, 2021

To all of you extraordinary women and men, please know that we hear you, we see you, we support you and are overwhelmingly grateful for every single thing you do, every day, 24/7. it would be a privilege not just to walk you home but to carry you home and nurture you as you hopefully recover from this nightmare.

forward April 5, 2021

Why are we STILL hearing this story.? My daughter was raped in her hospital bed by someone who knew us. She has spent 4 months as a phsyc patient because this absolute asshole has stolen who she was. She will never work a regular job because complex P T S D  will not allow her to. They tell me maybe 3-4 years of hell can be expected. No! I see a lifetime of it for her. 

She can’t fund or cope with a trial. He knows where we live - police advice...bump up your security and we’ll try to do more drive bys. Thanks, it’s not your fault, but that’s just not bloody close to what she needs. 
Her assault has decimated my family. People think, “it’s a long time ago, she should be right by now!”  Excuse me while I take you out with a sharp right cross. My girl is gone. Her joy is gone. Her peace is gone. I am gone.
He’s probably done this many times, and he will again. He has, and I quote, a 97% chance of getting off! Pretty damned good odds to offend again and get away with it. Why shouldn’t he?
Today, another hospital, another bed, another cocktail of drugs to try and heal other wounds. Another week of no sleeping leading up to it. Another week of constant anxiety. Just another week ...but she’ll get over it soon...not

forward January 29, 2021

Great article Dan! It’s so important to spend time with your children, reading daily but also chatting and playing. The kitchen floor can stay sticky - your child needs to take priority over that!

Your child doesn’t need the latest gaming platform, they need you!
Teachers and parents have the exact same goal - to bring up a healthy, resilient child who knows that they have unique gifts to contribute to making this world a better place.
Keep communicating with your child’s teachers, even it’s a relatively small question or issue.. Don’t  fall into the “car park mafia.” Go straight to the source.  We will be honest with you and if we made a mistake, ( and we will - we are only human!) we will do our very best to fix it.
We work hard because we care. We work hard to get to know and appreciate your child and, in turn their family. Please join us and spend quality time with your children.
To all my fellow educators, have a great year!  To all my children and their families, I’ve already begun to. Know these amazing small humans and I’m so excited to be working with you this year!

forward September 27, 2020

As a very experienced teacher I can tell you that the upheavals of this year have impacted on your child in many ways. This is the time to use a challenging situation to build resilience in your precious little human. 

Please try and keep your own fears to yourself by focusing on how awesome it’s going to be to back with their friends and teachers in a safe place. Remind them that any adult in a school environment is a safe person to go to. if they need to. (You don’t need to tell them that we have had extensive training to comfort and support them in the healthiest ways but we have!)
Jump on the internet and let them choose a new lunchbox or drink bottle. Help them get excited.
If your child does express fear or anxiety, that’s normal. I’m anxious too! Listen to them carefully and reply honestly in terms that are appropriate for their age. As you listen, try and work out what is actually worrying them. It may not be what you think - It could be Covid related, but it could also be that they have forgotten where the toilets are or they aren’t used to being around a lot of people anymore or they don’t feel confident about making friends again or they have suddenly realised they’re losing freedom in favour of routine. if you haven’t had a firm routine. It’s not too late to establish one.
There will probably be some tears (the kids might cry too!) but a calm gentle send off at the school gates to whichever teacher is on duty is the best thing you can do. Remind them you’ll be back and then walk away. Go home, sit down in the quiet and relax knowing your child is safe. Have a cry if you need to, call a friend - whatever works. Your child is safe.
I can reassure you that we will be focusing on helping your child regain their school confidence. We are watching all the time. If you can’t handle the wait till 3:30, email your child’s teacher and they will get back to you as soon as they can .
Teaching is a viciously hard job. There’s only one reason we do it-because we want every child to become a confident, resilient and active community member and, to be honest, I’d much rather be with kids than grown ups! 
Remember, your child is safe, cared for, known and noticed. We can’t wait to have them back again!

forward September 17, 2020

I also teach in a Covid hotspot. I have to be on campus at least one or two days depending on the week. As ours is a primary school, the students don’t wear masks and we are not permitted to do so while teaching, but are expected to do so at other times like break or working with colleagues. After 20 odd years in the job I have developed a strong immune system resistant to the Petri dish of germs that is a primary classroom. This year I have caught every bug and been in iso after COVID testing three times - days that came out of my dwindling sick leave.

I accept, reluctantly, that my presence is necessary for kids who can’t work from home. We have handwash, wipes, soap, disinfectant, constant cleaning - everything we can do to keep us all safe.
What I do have a huge problem with is that our school is being reviewed by our governing body. This involves hours and hours of extra work and meetings. At the school end, it’s socially distanced, however, the governing body and reviewer will not walk through our school or set foot anywhere near us. Their end is all remote because it’s far too risky for them to be in a school environment. I call bullshit! If I can do it and am expected to do it, then they should join us on the frontline too. Then tell us what we need to do to get better.  Otherwise, do the decent thing, let us get on with the massive extra workload of teaching online and come by next year when this is a piece of history.

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