User Comments

reallife January 19, 2022

@fightofyourlife the real question is why aren't IVF clinics doing all their work in house?? You don't need to go to hospital to do any of it. I know this because i went through it. IVF clinics also have their own specific nurses and doctors

reallife January 9, 2022

This really resonates with me. I'm an Aussie living in NZ and I haven't seen my family in 2.5 years.  I've been so angry, and then so sad, followed by just immense disappointment on and off for the past years with all the border changes etc. It's hard to not feel angry, I've been feeling angry that other people aren't as angry and frustrated by the border situation as me.  

You're right Mia, there's just so much uncertainty with covid its utterly exhausting.. I'm actually going back to therapy this week.  My daughter is 3 and she's basically seen me cry every few days for the past year.  There is obviously nothing that I can do to change what is happening with covid, but I'm now all about getting some coping mechanisms in place.  It is such an expensive exercise to start private therapy. I'm so grateful that this is an option for me. 

reallife January 3, 2022

@omollee i think it depends on the age of the kids. Toddlers can be very exhausting. The boundary pushing can be relentless. So when you're partner is at work and you're dealing with the brunt of it then it can be really lonely. 

reallife December 28, 2021

I can see why you are turned off.  The childfree life looks enticing. I think more and more women will decide to go down that road and good on them!! Its incredibly draining raising a child and even more so when you have zero family support due to covid. I haven't seen my family in 2 + years and I just feel so unsupported.  It's been a hard slog and I envy my childfree friend. She lives it up! She's always off on holiday, getting massages, buying cocktails!  I'm just hoping this parenting gig gets easier. 

There will always be plenty of people that have 3 + kids, so boosting population is NOT a reason to have children. You either want to or you don't. end of story. There should be no shame or guilt put on people that choose to be childfree. 

reallife December 16, 2021

I feel for you. I'm really sorry for the loss of your father. I hope you can take care of your mental health whilst you are in quarantine. 

reallife November 30, 2021

I hear you. Infertility has definitely changed me. I know that this probably isn't entirely true, but I feel like when you have struggled to get what you have you appreciate it that bit more than the people that didn't struggle. This also means that I feel guilty if I whinge about my child, because out there someone is wondering if they'll ever be able to conceive or give birth to a healthy child.  It's definitely important to practice gratitude for the things we have but we also need to keep it real. It would be so nice to have someone to bounce these things off.  I live in NZ and IVF is still a bit taboo here. Perhaps because its so expensive. 

I also feel this way about birth stories.  I went through 4 rounds of IVF, 2 miscarriages and ended up having to have a csection.  I'm no stranger to medical intervention. My main goal was to have a healthy baby and that was always my focus.  Does that mean I'm not as tough as these mama warriors that are so proud to tell you they had a natural birth without any pain relief? Do I miss out on an award because I had a c section?  When did society become so egotistical about birthing ??

reallife November 20, 2021

This is how i feel about marriage. Unnecessary and outdated in my personal opinion 

reallife November 5, 2021

I too had a missed miscarriage. I had just gone through IVF and was going to a scan to see the heartbeat, I didn't even think anything was wrong and nearly went by myself but my friend told me she thought I should have someone with me.  I'm so glad I did because it was a really awful day. I knew something was wrong as soon as I saw the obstetricians face.  She was confused but kept searching for the heartbeat but it wasn't there :( Such a crappy time. 

reallife October 26, 2021

@simple simon because spray is awful for everyone else around, and terrible for the environment 

reallife September 28, 2021

@maya it sounds like you're going through a really rough time. I hope things pick up for you. But everyone is just trying to make the best out of their situation. What makes one person feel better doesn't have to make you feel better too. 

reallife September 28, 2021

I'm so sorry you two have to put up with that. It's so wrong.  We all need to call people out on their terrible behaviour towards others. If you see it happen and don't call it out, i believe you are somewhat complicit 

reallife September 7, 2021

Congratulations on your pregnancy! Super exciting and sounds like you have everything you need :) 

reallife August 17, 2021

@loz read the article! Youre just getting defensive. She's saying she doesn't want any advice. People need to mind their own business. Let people lead their own lives! Someone's weight and body is no one elses business!!!

reallife August 15, 2021

I can relate to this!!!! I do consider it fussy, especially compared to what us adults eat. Kids are so particular about what and how they eat food. It's exhausting. Really takes the joy out of making food. Thank god for yoghurt pouches & chicken nuggets

reallife August 2, 2021

Thank you for sharing your story, I'm really sorry for your loss.

reallife July 11, 2021

@mamamia-user-482898552 yes you are probably right. Though i feel like we could have our own category. I often don't feel like i belong to the 'breeders' group or the 'child free' group. I feel I'm somewhere in between. I'm not sure if that's how most mums of 1 feel or not

reallife July 11, 2021

@mamamia-user-482898552 you are only seeing this from your perspective. How would you know how she is perceived by parents that choose to have multiple children. 

reallife July 10, 2021

I am a mum of one and i complete agree, there's ridiculous pressure on women to have children and preferably multiple. Own your decision i say! The questions are tiresome though...

reallife June 27, 2021

My experience of pregnancy was amazing, i loved it. It was like nothing else ive ever experienced! So cool! Enjoy :) 

reallife June 19, 2021

I completely relate to this. We did ivf too. Toddlers can be difficult, of course you love your child but you dont always have to like them or their behaviour. I still feel guilty if im not appreciating or grateful for every minute with my child