The 8 things all pregnant women know to be true.

In the whole scheme of things, nine months might not seem that long.

But for a pregnant woman, each passing month brings change and not just the increasing size of that beautiful bump. From hair sprouting from strange crevices to dealing with a thirst that never goes away, pregnancy has many wonderful but utterly bizarre realities.

So, we decided to list the eight biggest truths that all those who have endured the nine-month journey will relate to.

1. Throwing up in public.

Obviously named by some dude doctor who didn’t really have a clue about pregnancy nausea, morning sickness hardly disappears neatly by lunchtime like the name suggests. And not only does it stick around all day, but it also seems to really ramp up on public transport. Frustratingly, it’s at its worst during the first trimester when a bump hasn’t yet formed so you generally just looks like a drunk having an afternoon vom on the bus from work. Classy.

2. Sweet or salty?

Waking up at 2am to eat sliced lemon? Wanting to chow down on some soil (yes, that’s a pregnancy thing)? Eating cold beans out of the can? Pregnancy unlocks some seriously strange food cravings that generally fall into the camp of sweet or salty, with many believing it’s an indicator of what gender of baby you’re having. You can guess which is which, right? And what’s perhaps even stranger is that those cravings completely disappear once the baby pops out!

It’s definitely a girl. via GIPHY

3. Chasing waterfalls.

The thirst is real during pregnancy. The only other time you’ll feel like an ocean’s amount of water still won’t quench your thirst is when breastfeeding. So yes, you’re essentially feeling desert-dry for about two years if you also go down the breastfeeding route. It’s all down to your body working double-time, creating life or creating almost a litre of milk a day, so keep topped up, even opting for an electrolyte-rich solution like Hydralyte to replace water and electrolytes.

Pregnant women are recommended to drink 12 glasses of fluids a day  – more than most of us usually have. So yes, pregnancy is a good time to pop a Hydralyte powder sachet, ice block or drink when you’re in dehydration mode – especially from that dreaded morning sickness.

4. Hours in the loo.

There’s no firm science behind this but all those hours trying to push due to constipation must be to get into the groove for pushing a baby out after nine months. Most pregnant women spend ages heaving, huffing and sweating, with our legs placed on a stool trying to relieve ourselves. Yep, haemorrhoids really do tarnish that incredible creating-life vibe.

5. Hair, hair everywhere.

Long glossy locks are beautiful, except when they’re sprouting from your top lip, out of your nose and around your nipples. No really, no one in the history of womankind has ever wanted a beardy boob. But thanks to all those hormones, hair pops up all over the place and while all that extra hair on your head all falls out after giving birth, the rest stays put as women just can’t catch a break.

Dance if you’ve got hair in fun places! Woo! via GIPHY

6. What’s my name?

Wowser, who knew that getting impregnated could also cause a lobotomy? But ask any mum-to-be and they’ll swear that they’ve got ridiculously forgetful. In fact, it’s proven that cognitive ability reduces in pregnancy and even after the little one is earth side. So not only are our sweet-faced angels giving our bodies a bit of a run for their money, but they’re also stealing our brains.

7. Strange dreams.

A gorilla serving you at a restaurant? Being chased through the woods by a gaggle of geese? Bonkers dreams are to ensure that even when you’re sleeping, your pregnancy is keeping you on your toes. What’s perhaps weirder is that you actually always have those dreams but you remember them because you’re waking up so often (usually to pee!).

8. Stuff down below happens.

The more pregnant we get, the more stuff comes out of our nether regions. Yep, it’s all part of the process of prepping our bodies for birth. Terrifying if you haven’t had the memo about it being completely and utterly normal.

What were the most surprising things about pregnancy for you?