It can be a nightmare for parents (and the rest of the family) when the grown kids just don’t get along.
Sibling rivalry can be so bad families are forced to hold two separate functions so each can attend without running into the other. It really is the stuff of nightmares.
Trying to manage a family in which siblings are at war is a nightmare. In fact it’s safe to say that my worst nightmare as a parent would be for my children to grow up and not get along.
Having seen families fracture for years over the most minor of insults, I’m determined that my children won’t suffer the same fate.
“Love each other,” I tell them. “Look after each other.”
“Remember you are family. Never, ever fight so much that you forget you are meant to love each other and be there for each other.”
They look at me in confusion. They don’t yet understand just how horrific sibling disagreements can be as adults, how the entire family can be affected and how sad it makes the parents who just want everyone to get along.
The last text I received from my sister. Article continues after this video.
Top Comments
It might seem to an outsider (who can even be the parents!) that siblings are being selfish or deliberately making it hard for the rest of the family but It's not always the case.
I was repeatedly raped by my brother (6 years older than me) as a child. Never been able to bring myself to tell my parents. The rift might hurt them but the truth would kill them.
I might be their "child" but I am a capable adult making a decision that I feel is best for me and my family.
My sisters and I fought horribly when we were teens but now get along quite well. The trick is knowing your limitations. You family doesn't necessarily have to be the all-consuming centre of your life. Not all families are meant to be like the Waltons - some families really do operate better at a distance, so why force them to go through a show of togetherness that is little better than putting cats in a sack?
No way would I ever live with either of my sisters - we would drive each other crackers. But we see each other irregularly and enjoy that instant family 'shorthand' communication that means we understand each other better than even the closest of friends.