"She wanted him to man up." Inside the splintering marriage of Vili and Mary Kay.

He was a 12-year-old boy in Year 6 and she was a 34-year-old school teacher when she first raped him 20 years ago. Through it all – puberty, a prison sentence, 12 years of marriage and raising two children – they kept a relationship until Vili Fualauu filed for divorce from Mary Kay Letourneau last month.

Now, a friend of 33-year-old Fualauu, who works as a DJ in his home city of Seattle, says the writing may have been on the wall for longer than either of them realised, telling People, “she always wanted him to man up and take responsibility.”

“She was making the money, and he was trying to get his career as a DJ to take off, so he would spend a lot of time working on that,” the friend said.

“He said that she would be pissed off that he wasn’t doing as much around the house as she was.”

The friend added, “She would get on him when he wasn’t doing his part. She’d want him to be more involved in the raising of the kids, like go to their shows and things.”

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The couple's children, 20-year-old Audrey and 18-year-old Georgia, were conceived while Letourneau was on parole for her seven-year sentence for child rape. The couple eventually married after almost eight years of dating, when Fualauu was almost 21.

And despite the news of their recent separation, Fualaau's friend that says from the outside and for the most part, their relationship was a loving one.

“He complained like guys complain about their wives," the friend said, "but he loved her. They usually got along. He didn’t complain when she’d show up to the clubs. He seemed happy to see her.”

But according to Fualaau, the separation is more about legalities than it is about the state of their relationship.

Speaking to Radar Online, the 33-year-old said he plans to become a licensed distributor of ‘Cigaweed’ marijuana cigarettes, which are legal in his home state of Washington.

“When you want to get licensed, they do background checks on both parties,” Fualaau said. “If I decide to be a part of it I have to be licensed and I have to be vetted and so does a spouse. She has a past. She has a history.”

He added, "It’s fine. A piece of paper doesn’t break someone’s feelings!”