Lying on my back with my legs in stirrups, I could feel my body starting to shake.
I’d been poked and prodded in places only your gynaecologist is allowed to visit so many times that day, and the spot I stared at on the ceiling was beginning to look like a pear. I focused harder on it to try to distract myself from the discomfort. Pear, pear, pear.
The doctor wheeled over to me on her wheel-y doctor stool and, moving on to the next phase of torture, informed me she was about to to poke my vagina with a Q-tip.
“Do whatever you have to do,” I said. She did, gently, and all of a sudden my vagina burst into flames. I mean, not literally, but it might as well’ve been. The pain shuddered through my body, as if someone were stabbing me with a steel rod.
“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” I yelled. Tears had begun to stream down my face. She took her hand away from my vagina and took her gloves off. Then she turned to look at me.
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This is really a very strange story - what is the clinical indication for a pelvic examination and speculum at the age of 13? I really find it incredibly hard to believe that a doctor would deem it necessary to do so. Why would the cervix need to be visualised? A pap-smear is not necessary in a (presumably) non-sexually active 13 year old girl. What were they looking for? That just simply doesn't add up in my mind (as a doctor myself). Why did your mother think it necessary for you to have a pelvic exam? How bizarre.
Tess, I was asking myself the same question - when I read that I was shocked that any mother or doctor though it appropriate for a pelvic exam, and speculum insertion at 13 years old.
Hi,
THere are other ways to do sex than just sticking a penis inside a vagina.. A heads up. Some men like being hit / spanked and stuff instead.. You might find it therapeutic to get into that if you've been hurt so badly yourself..
When i was bullied i took up fast bowling some time later and was good at it because it was condoned for me to bowl fast at people.. where as i couldn't do anything back to the bully 'cos i'd get the blame.. Like i didn't try to kill anyone with bouncers but because it wasn't common for a female to be good at cricket it surprised people that i could do it fast..
but karma gave me a bad back so you'd be better off finding the men who are open to this sort of thing.. they might strongly crave it etc.
Just because something is commonly done one way doesn't mean everyone has to jump on the bandwagon of it. THere's so much more to life than that.