baby

"How I felt when I saw this photo of Kylie Jenner at Coachella."

According to the interwebs, there’s a lot wrong with this recent Insta post by Kylie Jenner. And it’s not that she has fuschia hair, which, as any Pink fan knows, is so start of the millennium.

This is the offending post:

I’m not a regular mom I’m a cool mom

A post shared by Kylie (@kyliejenner) on

One may think it’s simply a photo of a young woman at Californian music festival Coachella, but one would be gravely mistaken: this photo is so much more than that.

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As you can see, the caption is the classic quote from the cult movie, Mean Girls – “I’m not a regular mom, I’m a cool mom.”

Personally, I find it the most relatable sentence Jenner’s ever uttered.

The quote is in reference to Jenner’s baby daughter, Stormi, whom she gave birth to on February 1. Jenner is making a clear statement, “Just had a foetus in my womb but I’ve still got it”, which one would bloody hope, given she’s only twenty years of age.

And that, contrary to popular opinion, life does not end at motherhood.

But the online trolls were not impressed by this sans-Stormi moment. To save you the time of scrolling through their comments, here’s a summary of the complaints:

  1. How dare she leave the house without her baby?
  2. How dare she do something for herself when all good mums know that you must sacrifice your entire life as you knew it when you become a mother?
  3. Who even cares about Coachella? STFU about it.

Ok, fine, that third one was from me, but the other questions remain – and I’ll now address them for you.

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A post shared by Kylie (@kyliejenner) on

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How dare she leave the house without her baby?

One person on Instagram wrote, “I don’t see a cool mom, I see an attention-seeking young woman.”

But here’s the thing: like ’em or loathe ’em, the Kardashian/Jenners have built a very successful and lucrative empire. Jenner may have just given birth, but she’s also got a business to run.

I mean, who else is going to keep baby Stormi in mini electric Bentleys for the next few years?

So let’s remember that Jenner is still a working mum, who needs to maintain her relevancy via a social media presence – and not judge her for that choice.

How dare she do something for herself when all good mums know that you must sacrifice your entire life as you knew it when you become a mother?

We all bang on about self-care for mums and how it can help combat post-natal depression, a woman’s well being more generally as well as that of her child, and yet when we’re presented with a mother who’s doing something enjoyable for herself, we tear her to shreds?

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Here’s a secret about newborns that no one tells you: they have no clue what’s going on. They need sustenance and cuddles and will survive – even thrive – if they don’t get those things from their mothers – so long as they get them from someone.

When they’re newborns is the time to take time out for yourself; when your life has just been upheaved by this infinitely adorable little tornado, that’s the perfect time to take time out to breathe. It’s actually harder as they get older and know you and want you, which triggers the mother-guilt that lasts for the next twenty years.

So you need to do it when they’re little if you can and/or want to, and keep it up forever, if you can and/or want to.

It’s each mother’s choice.

As the pile on about Jenner’s decision to go to a music festival as a new mum has grown more and more vicious, I can’t help but think it’s no wonder this woman hid her pregnancy from the world.

Now that her baby is here, let’s allow her to learn by experience what her parenting style will be – as every mother has the right to do.

We deep dive on the ACTUAL hours mums and dads are putting in, on our family podcast.