celebrity

The 7 most bizarre things about Kim Kardashian's "minimal monastery" home.

 

Kim Kardashian has given her fans a rare tour of her Calabasas home, which she shares with husband Kanye West, and their three (soon to be four) children. As part of her cover for Vogue in America, the reality TV star and entrepreneur also did one of the magazine’s famous YouTube series, “73 Questions” with Joe Sabia.

The series follows celebrities from a point of view shot as Sabia asks personality-quiz-type questions. But while the Kardashian sister, who announced that she recently began studying law, was answering the questions, we were distracted by all the bizarre details of her house, which she describes as a “minimal monastery”.

The house is reportedly worth £46million, which translates to a cool $84 million in Australian dollars. Although it is sure to serve as interior design porn for many, it also raises a lot of unanswered questions about the functionality of a house that looks like an art gallery.

So here are the seven most bizarre details I noticed when watching the house tour.

1. Everything is so white.

Kim Kardashian house
That looks like a wall that the kids would like to paint on. Image: Vogue.
ADVERTISEMENT

As soon as Kanye West opens the door to the house, you realise that their house is based on a white/cream/beige colour palette and everything is so... clean.

The walls look like a blank canvas that North and Saint could have a lot of fun painting on.

With three kids and one more on the way, keeping this house clean must take a full time job because seriously, white and kids don't go together in normal people's lives.

2. Where is the stuff?

Kim Kardashian house
Why is there no tat? Image: Vogue.
ADVERTISEMENT

Their house is literally empty. Aside from the very limited selection of furniture, there is a noticeable lack of... tat.

Whilst the famous couple are of course going for the minimalist design, there are just no things. Like, where are the kids' blankies and the puzzle they left out last night? And where is the selfie book that Kim Kardashian published as a coffee table book, Selfish?

3. Is that a... science lab?

Kim Kardashian house
What is the functional purpose of those taps? ? Image: Vogue.
ADVERTISEMENT

This room confuses me because it looks like a mix between a science lab/bathroom/lounge room. But also why is there a bath in a room that has ceiling-to-floor windows?

The table top reminds me of the benches in my Year 10 science lab at school and are they storing bunsen burners underneath, yes or no?

But literally what is the functional purpose of these taps if there is no sinks? It just seems so... impractical. Beautiful. But impractical.

4. There are no doors.

Kim Kardashian house
They have a bathroom, with no doors... Image: Vogue.
ADVERTISEMENT

What house has no doors? Not even on the bathrooms?

Throughout the whole tour there is no sight of a single door. How do you have four kids and not have doors with locks to keep North from barging in?

5. There's a naked human.

Kim Kardashian house
Is this a house or a museum? Image: Vogue.
ADVERTISEMENT

Oh. There's a naked human that lives next to Kim and Kanye's "unbleached Steinway" piano which is of course white.

It looks like a statue that belongs in a museum or an art gallery that kids should definitely not be allowed near.

6. Their kitchen is actually a restaurant.

Kim Kardashian house
I wonder if the kids and Kanye fight each night over who gets to sit on the comfy side? Image: Vogue.

As the tour enters their kitchen we get a glimpse of their dining room table in which half of the seating is a couch, just like restaurants. I wonder if the kids and Kanye fight each night over who gets to sit on the comfy side?

ADVERTISEMENT

Then we move round to the actual kitchen and oh, this literally is a eatery because their kitchen is glorious. But also, no one's kitchen is this clean.

Kim Kardashian house
Yes this is a beautiful kitchen. Image: Vogue.

7. The Vogue photoshoot.

ADVERTISEMENT

My favourite part of the whole house tour is that when you see the photoshoot Kim Kardashian did for the magazine with her three kids, it portrays her as a much more relatable mum with a chaotic household.

But literally nothing about her kitchen is chaotic and there is no toys on the ground ANYWHERE in Kim's house tour. But I like the sentiment of Kim trying to be 'relatable' on the same day she shows us a house tour of her "minimal monastery".

This interview has actually left me with more unanswered questions than I had to begin with and I actually really need them answered, please Kim.