There are some really positive run on effects of wedding planning in your very early 20s. When I got married at the tender age of 23 none of my friends had children. This made it very easy to exclude kids from my guest list. There just weren’t any around. No little cousins, no young nieces or nephews in fact I think I may have been one of the youngest people at my own wedding.
But not everybody is as “lucky” as I was.
I know that I have been invited to weddings that seem to go on for ever. The service at 3pm, drinks at 5pm , the reception at 7pm. One wedding I recently attended even had an after-party. That’s a lot of babysitting hours required. Or a complete revision of the wedding so that little people can be included on the guest list.
It seems that people are going to extreme lengths to cater for children on their wedding day offering child minding, child friendly meals and activities for the children (like colouring in, blocks, arts and craft, board games and even jumping castles).
As Australians tie the knot later in life, and head down the aisle more than once, planners say couples increasingly have to debate the kid factor at nuptials.
Some are stating ‘adults-only reception’ to help cut costs while others are asking guests to pay for their children’s meals.
Planning website easyweddings.com.au social media manager Samantha Amjadali said it could be a contentious issue but children at weddings were increasingly being catered for by venues and child-minding businesses.
”If couples don’t invite children to the wedding it usually has more to do with cost-per-head or that the reception venue isn’t child-friendly,” she said.
”Sometimes, it’s genuinely about wanting to give guests who are parents a ‘night off’. But there are plenty of ways to have kids there, a lot of cottage industries have risen up like babysitters who cater especially for weddings.”
The issue is being fiercly debated on easy wedding’s Facebook page, with some dealing with long-running grudges from relatives whose children were not invited.
Some said children were not appropriate at receptions but others said it would be rude to exclude them.
How would you feel about kids at your wedding? Would you be upset if your children were excluded from a wedding guest list?
Top Comments
We love our friends kids, but our wedding is not the place for them. Invitations to the engagement were sent personalised to the whole family- and the wedding just the adults. Our friends have all been very supportive. Its the family that seem to have some feeling of entitlement.
Yeah only in Western cultures...children are excluded from important family ritual and celebration. At my wedding overseas planned by the groom we had every child in his family sitting at their own table at the party at a hotel (hours after the registry etc) and they behaved as expected because they are always included in every family celebrations. The older kids looked after the youngest ones and they didn't run around or leave the table and later sang and the girls danced a traditional dance. My parents loved it!
Everyone is so proud of children there whether they are parents or not and also take them to restaurants where the staff bend over backwards to make sure they are happy and you have really friendly fellow diners who have no problem with kids because it is so normal to see children everywhere.
I noticed that everyone just LOVED babies and children even teenage boys like my in-laws and friend's sons. I would often walk into a room carrying my 3 month old or 14mth old and they would take the baby from me and walk around with him or her. The only time I saw that here was with my niece's Italian boyfriend with my younger sister's son.
Then living here experienced the stark contrast ( and other examples too of kid's exclusion) with a sister's wedding then a cousin's wedding. Kids were expected to misbehave etc etc etc and had no place there so not invited.
Wonder if alcohol is a factor? Eg we go out and expect to drink and get drunk and enjoy ourselves and who wants kids there? The only people drinking at my wedding were my parents and the groom. Alcohol and drinking just isn't something that is part of every life event there eg birth, graduation, 18th, 21st, promotion, birthdays, weddings Xmas NYE etc.