The beauty treatment Zoe Foster won't try.

by ZOE FOSTER

For those who have seen Channel 10’s The Shire (my condolences), you will have had very recent exposure to lip enhancements, because there are two young women on the show who are doing nothing for the stereotype of lip injections looking blindingly unnatural, although they have kindly relieved some of the pressure from Sophie Monk and Lindsay Lohan, so that’s nice of them.

They are in their mid-twenties, these dames, which is far too young for dermal fillers of any kind in my opinion, and as we’ve seen, they are not exactly exercising restraint. I think they would look a shire load better with just some lovely lip pumping gloss (Sally Hansen’s Lip Inflation or Lip Fusion from Mecca are the best) but it’s their choice, obviously and they really, really seem to love their lips, even if their stupid doctor won’t let them get more injections so their lips literally nudge their nose. I mean, what a jerk he must be.

Lip enhancement and augmentation was originally developed as a tool to add volume or shape to thin or ageing/wrinkled lips, and “done well” I concede they can have a youthful effect. One friend I have in her fifties has twice-yearly collagen in her lips, and combined with a spot of Botox on the forehead, this definitely makes her look fresher, and in a gentle, natural way. (She is also religious about sunscreen, which helps.)

The key words there were, ‘done well,’ because so often they are not done well, whether that’s because the person doing the fillers has not thoroughly assessed the patient’s lips and face and doesn’t create a natural enough look, (generally it’s overfilling of the top lip that makes it look wrongo – the lower lip should be 1.5x bigger than the upper) or the person requesting them doesn’t care for natural (cue Vernesa and Sophie) instead opting for ludicrously bulbous, glossy sausages that fool precisely no one, and are not intended to.

To me, done well means lips that are subtly plumped in the areas of the lips that are naturally fuller, and are not noticeable except for that the lips look a little bit more plump and the face looks… younger somehow. I don’t believe done well means “bigger” or more noticeable.

I’ve not had them, but despite my rant above, I certainly don’t judge women who get lip enhancement, I just encourage them to do their research, and go by recommendation, and definitely don’t go for a cheaper price over a better clinic. It’s never ever worth it – this is your FACE.

Generally, after years of chatting with the people who perform lip fillers, and who’ve tried them, my position on lip injections is this:

– Less is definitely  1000% more

– If in doubt, don’t

– If not in doubt, go to someone you trust, whose work you have seen on other women and like

– If you’re worried people will notice, know that they probably will, so be okay with that

– I’m yet to see a good lip job, although an argument could be made that I wouldn’t know, because it was a good job

– They become strangely addictive, from all evidence…

Also, while we are told fillers break down in the body (most lip fillers last 6-9 months) there is evidence that remnants can stick around for good. This is why some women get trapped into more a cycle of more and more fillers – to balance out the lumps from previous jobs. Cute.

I once interviewed the best and most insanely expensive facelift surgeon in the world, a fascinating, charming Texan man based in NYC, and he said – get ready – when he lifts the face up to perform surgery, he can see lines of grey sludge around the lips and cheeks from filler that has been there for years, and building up, and eventually the skin tissue grows over it. This was pretty much enough to scare me off fillers for life.

Horrifying tales aside, I suppose all of this augmentation on the face and body isn’t such a strange proposition. A lot of women desire intentionally and obviously enhanced breasts, lashes, tans, nails and hair; lips were a natural progression.

I suppose if we acknowledge the work of science fiction over the years (even recent books/films like The Hunger Games) we humans seem to have agreed that in the future, what is artificial is what will be desirable, not what is natural. Painted skin, bizarre hair, augmentation, amendments and enhancement  – this has been the vision of the future for a long time and maybe, just maybe Vernesa and Sophie are advancing towards this weird, synthetic ideal faster than we old-fashioned thin-lipped types are.

Zoe is an author, columnist and porridge fan. Her books include the beauty bible Amazing Face, dating and relationship guide Textbook Romance, and three novels, Air Kisses, Playing The Field and The Younger Man. Find more info on her here, or supervise on her daily procrastination here and here.

Please understand that Zoë cannot respond to ALL your questions – but never fear, there are readers that are bound to know the answers, so don’t be afraid to ask.

Here are some famous lips who may or may not have been augmented. Only they know for sure.

Would you ever get lip fillers?