Alison Chrun has it all, except that she wants to be just like her zen master husband. How DO we get all the extra bullshit to leave our brains, she asks.
Men are so simple-minded, and I mean that in the best way. That is, until I mean it in the worst way. Being simple of the mind might get them into trouble with us women from time to time, but they seem to be quite happy and content in that state, and I just want some of what they’re having.
My question to all you men out there is, “How do I get all the extra bullshit to leave my brain? And what is making you all so damn happy?”
Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy, but I wish I were that happy and that simple.
Here are just a few of the ways I wish I were like my husband:
My man is as easy to read as a damn baby book. There are no hidden feelings lurking in the back of his conscience, waiting to creep out and attack me at my weakest moment. He’s not dramatic about a little wrench thrown into his day, such as plans changing at the last minute. He’s uncomplicated in a way that makes me jealous. I wish I could be as predictable and easy to read.
Me, on the other hand? My middle name is complicated. I am a puzzle piece that changes shape just when he thinks he’s found where I fit. Poor guy.
2. Easy to please
Six things make my husband happy: family, beer, football, spicy food, sex, and The Walking Dead. See how easy that is?
Depending on the day, week, or time of the month, who knows how to please me? I wish my hormones had a schedule we could refer to and a way to consult them at any given moment. My hubby would appreciate that.
“Sorry, honey. Your guess is as good as mine.”
My husband is hardly bothered by anything. His responses to problems or issues are generally, “I’m sure it will all work out” or “it will be ok.” Doesn’t he know it WILL NOT BE OK? Doesn’t he know we need to stew over the issue, give it unnecessary energy, and worry about it even though it may be out of our control?