parents

This T-shirt isn't the problem. You're the problem.

By MAGGIE HAMILTON

Silly parents, I’m looking at you.

Over-reactive, over-protective parents who are expending precious energy stressing about things that really don’t matter, I’m pointing an un-manicured finger in your direction.

How do you know if I am, indeed, calling you foolish? Here’s the test:

Are you offended by this T-shirt?:

The one on the left – that is.

If the answer is yes, we can no longer be friends.

Apparently, on this T-shirt, Ice Queen Elsa is making a “rude gesture” with her fingers. Allegedly, she’s flicking a ‘V-sign’, which is like an old-fashionedy English version of what you would probably call ‘The Bird.’

Yes. That’s right. Fictional Disney royalty uses naughty fingers.

If seeing this top on the rack in your local cheapo clothing store would make you dash off some indignant remarks on their Facebook page, or send a furious email in ANGRY CAPITALS. I have an upper-case message of my own for you:

YOU ARE NOT HELPING. You are getting upset about THE WRONG THINGS.

Because this T-shirt, carried in H&M clothing stores in the UK, has been the subject of complaints from parents who claim that the Disney-approved shirt is “encouraging” their kids to give them the “V-sign”.

H&M have actually had to waste moments of a staff member’s time – that person probably has a university degree and everything – to comment on this.

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Just like the parents who stormed out of the recent Miley Cyrus concert in horror, and were blasted here by Em Rusciano, you are the mothers and fathers who are giving the rest of us a bad name.

You’re making parents look stupid and petty, and like they have TOO MUCH TIME ON THEIR HANDS. Which is remarkable, because since I became a parent I haven’t had time to cut my toenails, but that’s another story.

Because Elsa is not “giving the Vs” – and side-note, that’s not even A Thing any more – she is not encouraging your eight-year-old to flick rude signs at their friends, teachers or you.

ELSA IS MAKING MAGICIAL SNOWFLAKES with her magical icy fingers. That’s what Elsa does.

And as a parent who has spent all of 2014 trying to hunt-down Frozen merch that will not bankrupt me, or attract pitying glances to my Elsa-obsessed daughter at preschool, let’s not have such high standards when it comes our Elsa-wear. Let’s embrace a slightly botchy transfer job. Let’s love on the ‘not quite the right shade of Elsa-aqua’ polyester party dress.

Because otherwise, we’re all going broke.

So if Olaf looks like he’s giving you the finger, and Christoff’s hair peeled off on the first wash, who cares? It wasn’t $80, and your kid’s happy.

Wake up and smell the reindeer poo, foolish parents.

Check out some other Frozen products that aren’t T-shirts here:

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