rogue

A message to all the friends who FORGET TO PAY US BACK.

 

Hello, friend.

Let me explain why you’re here.

So you’ve probably been linked to this article by a loved one. A loved one who is slightly ticked off and would like you to know something:

You still haven’t paid them back for that breakfast/dinner/lunch-y thing you went to the other day. Even when you PROMISED you would. Even when you said, “I’ll transfer you right now!” as you walked back to your car.

I’m even going to recommend you an app that helps keep track of who you owe money to. Post continues after audio. 

You – dearest little reader – owe your mate money. And they don’t know how else to tell you other than with a tersely worded article written by a total stranger.

They love you. They really, really do. I mean, you’re their friend for a reason, buddy! They don’t just go on breakfast/dinner/lunch-y dates with anybody. The chances are you’re clever and snazzy and special and cute. You probably tell really good jokes and were a right old laugh over that almond latte.

And yet, when your friend pulled out their debit card and said, “Just pay me back!” last [insert date here] you committed the ultimate friendship sin: You… didn’t.

Because the chances are you’re also as forgetful as the common goldfish.

Now, life is busy. Your dog might’ve had an anxiety attack when you got home. You might’ve dropped your phone in the toilet. Or been surprised with a once-in-a-lifetime trip to Peru. Or been sucked into the vortex that is free-to-air reality televisionShit happens. I get it.

What I also get is that forcing your friend to send the follow up “what bank are you with the money still hasn’t come through yet ha ha ha ha ha ha kill me immediately ha ha” text message is AKIN TO SOCIAL TORTURE and you should feel slightly bad.

Don’t make us feel awkward for chasing up our own money. Just don’t do it.

So, that’s why you’re here, friend.

You’re deeply loved, but… just… sort it out.

Sincerely,

The Person You Owe Money To.