I’m so sorry, little sister.
I’m so sorry you were the little girl that nobody wanted. You deserved so much more.
I’m sorry that mum started taking off for days at a time when you were just a baby. As your big sisters, Rhiannon and I tried our best to take care of you. But I was only seven, and she was only 10. We had no idea what we were doing. We probably should have called someone who could help, but we were so scared that we’d be taken away again.
I’m sorry that when the DOCS ladies dropped us off at Grandma’s, you weren’t allowed to stay because you were too much for her to cope with. I can’t imagine how awful it must have been to watch your sisters get smaller and smaller in the distance as you were driven away in a car you didn’t recognise.
I’m sorry that every time we went back to live with mum, she would end up getting drunk and terrifying you. I’m sorry that when you were a toddler you knew that loud music coming from mummy’s room meant she was getting drunk again. I’m sorry that when you were a toddler you even knew what getting drunk meant.