One Direction singer gets engaged. Teenage girls everywhere go into mourning.

1. Member of One Direction proposes to girlfriend. Teenage girls everywhere enter mourning.

If you thought that the number of crying schoolgirls you encountered on your way to work this morning was above average, you’re probably right.

Because, overnight, it was announced that Zayn Malik of One Direction fame has proposed to his girlfriend of two years, Perrie Edwards. And. She. Said. Yes.

Gasp!

To be honest, it’s not like the Directioners (One Direction’s dedicated teenage fanbase) didn’t have a bit of pre-warning. The rumour mill started spinning yesterday, when Edwards attended the premiere of One Direction’s new film, This is Us, with a very suspicious ring on a very suspicious finger.

The engagement was confirmed with a joint statement from the pairs’ reps:

Zayn and Perrie are engaged, but any further detail regarding their relationship is private.

The Directioners are particularly upset because Zayn is objectively the best looking of the British boy band, a fact scientifically proven when he dressed up as a girl in their latest music video, and was turned on by himself:

But the best part of this whole saga is the reaction from super obsessed and very devastated Directioners on Twitter.

Here are some of our favourites:

2. Prince William has given a revealing interview about new fatherhood and his desire to raise his son in the bush. Details here.

3. Dr Phil asks if it’s okay to have sex with rape a drunk girl. But don’t get grumpy about it because he was JUST ASKING, you guys!

On Tuesday, TV ‘Doctor’ (qualifications debatable) Phil tweeted this:

If a girl is drunk, is it okay to have sex with her? Reply yes or no to @drphil #teenaccused

At which point a number of groups and commentators understandably voiced their concern. Because of course the answer is a big fat ‘NO.’ Because: consent. So, why was he even asking the question? It turns out he was just conducting a poll for a show taping. Because that’s what doctors do – they research stuff. In a statement, The Dr Phil Show clarified:

This Tweet was intended to evoke discussion leading into a very serious show topic based upon a recent news story, hence the #teensaccused label. It was a poll question, not a statement or a joke.

As he has maintained over many years, Dr. Phil believes that the position of those incapacitated in any fashion; be it drugs, alcohol, age or mental illness can not and do not have the capacity to give their consent to anything, especially sex, which could have life changing repercussions.

This was a research post in preparation for a show, not a personal post and Dr. Phil deleted it the second he saw it. It was clearly ill-advised. We sincerely apologize that it suggested anything other than what was intended, data gathering. As you can imagine, Dr. Phil is very upset that this happened.

4. Melanie Griffith has slammed Hollywood, saying that it’s nearly impossible for her to get decent movie roles at age 56. Click here to read her damning words.

5. Cher releases her first music video in 12 years. Gives Miley Cyrus’ recent kooky clip a run for its money.

Newspaper hair. That is all.

6. David Beckham just can’t keep his pants on … Click here to see his latest striptease (you know you want to …)

7. Kelly Clarkson’s beautiful engagement photos.

Kelly Clarkson has tweeted pictures of her gorgeous engagement photo shoot.

The 31-year-old singer is pictured with her fiancé, Brandon Blackstock. The pair met when his stepfather became Clarkson’s manager. Take a look:

And, while you’re here, here’s a gallery of other celebs who have celebrated engagements recently:

8. A man is in critical condition after trying to stop thieves stealing his life-sized cut-outs of David Hasselhoff. Bizarre details here.

9. Simon Cowell: “I’m proud to be a dad.”

Simon Cowell has said that he is looking forward to becoming a father for the first time.

The 53-year-old told the BBC that, although he had denied wanting to have children in the past, he was looking forward to the experience, saying: “It’s something I hadn’t thought of before, but now I know I feel good about it.”

The X Factor UK judge made headlines when the pregnancy was announced. The mother of the child is New York socialite, Lauren Silverman, the wife of one of Cowell’s best friends, businessman and property developer, Andrew Silverman. The Silvermans are currently in the process of applying for a divorce.

Speaking about Lauren, Cowell said: “She’s a special girl.”

10. Best news ever: The virtual wardrobe in Clueless is real. REAL!

Clueless is a really nuanced and well-considered adaptation of Jane Austen’s Emma. In fact, we could probably write an academic response to the translation of the struggles of women in Georgian England into the 1990’s Californian landscape one day…

As if!

We’re way too taken with the clothes for any of that textual analysis rubbish. Because, let’s be honest, the best part of Clueless is the awesome virtual wardrobe from which Cher Horowitz selects her inspired outfits.

And now, friends, you could have one too. It’s called a Swivel, and it’s the virtual dressing room that could be your own virtual wardrobe. It’s currently only available in select retail stores, but they’re hoping to release a commercial version.

Here’s a video explaining how it works.

And, here’s a gallery of our favourite fashion moments from Clueless.

Ragin’: