It’s not everyday you get told you need to take Rogaine (the hair regrowth treatment for balding men) for your sad, over-plucked eyebrows, but it very recently happened to me.
There I was at a fancy schmancy beauty salon being told they could fix my eyebrows if I committed to a six-month complete eyebrow reassignment program (or something of a similar name) because my eyebrows were quite frankly, under-performing at their face framing duties.
My internal dialogue went into meltdown, and a little something like this: Shit, are my eyebrows that bad? I had no idea they were that bad. How could I not know this? Seriously, HOW COULD I NOT KNOW MY EYEBROWS ARE THAT BAD?
Is there something wrong with the mirror in my bathroom? And this is me growing my eyebrows back. Can’t she see all the hairs there? No, she can’t, because they are blonde, and therefore invisible. This eyebrow program sounds like a pyramid scheme. How am I going to get out of this? Smile and nod, yes, smile and nod and back away…
I should also mention the salon had done a makeup application after my facial I thought my eyebrows had taken on a rather Hannah Horvath/Mexican wrestler (Google it – you won’t regret it) quality to them.
So when I heard about the latest and wackiest cosmetic procedure that’s apparently, according to some surgeons, ‘on the rise,’ I get it, I really do.
According to Daily Mail, a recent survey found that enquiries into eyebrow implant surgeries have increased 45% from 2010 (or since Cara Delevingne and her magnificent eyebrows has been modelling), with 70% of these women citing over-plucking as the main cause.
Since the surgery costs £1,500, roughly AU$2,800 a pop, you can see why women are just enquiring about them and not actually going ahead with it.
Let me explain.
I came-of-age in the nineties. That weird time when the best movies were made (Clueless, Heathers, Empire Records – don’t even try to debate it, you know it’s true) but the fashion was dismal and the beauty trends, awful.
I’m talking dark matte lip stains, over-powdered goth white make-up and super-thin eyebrows anyone over the age of 29 is still recovering from.
Drew Barrymore was my spirit animal back then. I wanted to be her so much that I put daisies in my hair, wore velvet midriffs and black chokers and plucked my eyebrows into oblivion.
For the follically challenged who, like me, aren’t keen on dropping nearly $3,000 to transplant the hair from your head to the middle of your face, there are other options. There’s tinting, tattooing and Benefit’s Brows-a-go-go is amazing. Because as Beverly Piper, owner and director of Lash Perfect sadly says, “Fashions do change but gaps in brows will never be in.”
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