FLUFF: Portia and Ellen DeGeneres' marriage trouble? First they've heard of it.

FLUFF UPDATE: Beyonce releases a new album without telling anyone.

So, Beyonce just released a new album. Without telling anyone.

Like, she actually just uploaded her new eponymous album to iTunes and said: “Here ya go, universe.” (Note: she may or may not have actually said that.)

Fourteen new songs. Eighteen new videos. And a booklet.

This from Just Jared:

“I didn’t want to release my music the way I’ve done it,” Beyonce said about why she released it as a surprise. “I am bored with that. I feel like I am able to speak directly to my fans. There’s so much that gets between the music, the artist and the fans. I felt like I didn’t want anybody to give the message when my record is coming out. I just want this to come out when it’s ready and from me to my fans.”

We’re not sure if we’re furious that such a momentous occasion has been sprung on us with absolutely no time to emotionally prepare ourselves, or jubilant that Queen Bey managed to pull this off.

1. Ellen DeGeneres puts marriage trouble rumours to rest.

Ellen and Portia DeGeneres’ relationship has been the subject of cover upon cover of tabloid magazines (read: drunkenly written fairy stories) as of late, with multiple titles claiming that their marriage is on the rocks.

Which is awkward because, according to Ellen DeGeneres, the first time that she heard of her marriages impending failure was when she was sitting in the hair salon, next to a pile of tabloid magazines:

If you can’t watch the video, DeGeneres told her show’s audience:

It caught my eye because Portia and I were in the corner and I thought, ‘Oh that’s so sweet, they’re honouring us. But then I read the headline underneath. And it said: ‘Ellen and Portia Marriage Crumbles.’ And I was like, ‘Oh, what happened? They seemed so happy.’ And then I was like, ‘Wait, I’m Ellen.’ And I should know if that was happening.

DeGeneres then said: “There’s not one ounce of truth to any of it. I’m very happily married. In fact, the only thing we ever argue about is who loves who more.”

And, that’s that, folks.

2. Decorating your Christmas tree? Victoria Beckham proves that you’re doing it wrong.

The heels, the black dress, the step ladder, the Viva Forever doll… we have no words.

3. Prince Harry and Chelsy Davy’s text message conversations are leaked to

the public. And, yeah. We can kind of see why that ended.

The trial of former News of the World editors Clive Goodman and Andy Coulson continues today, revealing that the Prince’s ex-girlfriend used to be just a tad obsessed with him while he was away.

Emails between the two editors reveal that Chelsy Davy (remember her?) was bombarding Harry with calls and texts when he should have been “concentrating on training,” The emails also said that Chelsy was “driving him nuts” and that she was refusing to “leave him alone”.

Apart from being distracted by her, it seems Harry may also have been caught cheating. No, not cheating on Chelsy. The conversations tracked by News of the World showed that Harry was cheating on an essay he was supposed to write while at Sandhurst. Harry reportedly asked for an aide to help him write the paper.

To be honest, we’re going to cut Harry some slack here: what use is a team of aides if you can’t make them do your homework?

4. Golden Globe nominations are out! Were your favourites nominated?

So, Golden Globe nominations are out. And we’re all feeling that usual mix of “yay, award season” and “um… why have I never heard of any of these movies.” But, don’t worry, Australian Entertainment lovers, most of the nominations will be making it to our screen in the next couple of months.

And, just because we know how damn frustrating it is when all you want to know is who was nominated for Best Foreign Language Film and the article you’re reading has only published the top awards, here’s the full list:

MOVIES

Best Picture: Musical or Comedy

American Hustle
Her
Nebraska
The Wolf of Wall Street
Inside Llewyn Davis

Best Picture: Drama

12 Years a Slave
Captain Phillips
Gravity
Philomena
Rush

Best Director

Alfonso Cuarón, Gravity
Paul Greengrass, Captain Phillips
Steve McQueen, 12 Years a Slave
Alexander Payne, Nebraska
David O. Russell, American Hustle

Best Actress: Drama

Cate Blanchett, Blue Jasmine
Sandra Bullock, Gravity
Judi Dench, Philomena
Emma Thompson, Saving Mr. Banks
Kate Winslet, Labor Day

Best Actress: Comedy

Amy Adams, American Hustle
Julie Delpy, Before Midnight
Greta Gerwig, Frances Ha
Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Enough Said
Meryl Streep, August: Osage County

Best Actor: Drama

Chiwetel Ejiofor, 12 Years a Slave
Idris Elba, Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom
Tom Hanks, Captain Phillips
Matthew McConaughey, Dallas Buyers Club
Robert Redford, All Is Lost

Best Actor: Musical or Comedy

Christian Bale, American Hustle
Bruce Dern, Nebraska
Leonardo DiCaprio, The Wolf of Wall Street
Oscar Isaac, Inside Llewyn Davis
Joaquin Phoenix, Her

Best Supporting Actress

Sally Hawkins, Blue Jasmine
Jennifer Lawrence, American Hustle
Lupita Nyong’o, 12 Years a Slave
June Squibb, Nebraska
Julia Roberts, August: Osage County

Best Supporting Actor

Barkhad Abdi, Captain Phillips
Daniel Bruhl, Rush
Bradley Cooper, American Hustle
Michael Fassbender, 12 Years a Slave
Jared Leto, Dallas Buyers Club

Best Foreign Language Film

Blue Is the Warmest Color
The Hunt
The Past
The Great Beauty
The Wind Rises

Best Animated Film

The Croods
Despicable Me 2
Frozen

Best Original Song

Altas, The Hunger Games
Let it Go, Frozen
Ordinary Love, Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom
Please Mr. Kennedy, Inside Llewyn Davis
Sweeter than Fiction, One Chance

Best Original Score

All is Lost
Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom
Gravity
The Book Thief
12 Years a Slave

Best Screenplay

Spike Jonze, Her
Bob Nelson, Nebraska
Steve Coogan and Jeff Pope, Philomena
John Ridley, 12 Years a Slave
David O. Russell and Eric Warren Singer, American Hustle

TELEVISION

Best Television Series: Drama

Breaking Bad
Downton Abbey
The Good Wife
House of Cards
Masters of Sex

Best Television Series: Musical or Comedy

The Big Bang Theory
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
Girls
Modern Family
Parks and Recreation

Best Actress in a Television Series: Drama

Julianna Margulies, The Good Wife
Tatiana Maslany, Orphan Black
Taylor Schilling, Orange Is the New Black
Kerry Washington, Scandal
Robin Wright, House of Cards

Best Actor in a Television Series: Drama

Bryan Cranston, Breaking Bad
Liev Schreiber, Ray Donovan
Michael Sheen, Masters of Sex
Kevin Spacey, House of Cards
James Spader, The Blacklist

Best Actress in a Television Series: Musical or Comedy

Zooey Deschanel, New Girl
Lena Dunham, Girls
Edie Falco, Nurse Jackie
Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Veep
Amy Poehler, Parks and Recreation

Best Actor in a Television Series: Musical or Comedy

Jason Bateman, Arrested Development
Don Cheadle, House of Lies
Michael J. Fox, The Michael J. Fox Show
Jim Parson, The Big Bang Theory
Andy Samberg, Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Best Supporting Actress: Television

Jacqueline Bisset, Dancing on the Edge
Janet McTeer, The White Queen
Hayden Panettiere, Nashville
Monica Potter, Parenthood
Sofia Vergara, Modern Family

Best Supporting Actor: Television

Josh Charles, The Good Wife
Rob Lowe, Behind the Candelabra
Aaron Paul, Breaking Bad
Jon Voight, Ray Donovan
Corey Stoll, House of Cards

Best Television Miniseries or Movie

American Horror Story: Coven
Behind the Candelabra
Dancing on the Edge
Top of the Lake
The White Queen

Best Actor in a Television Miniseries or Movie

Michael Douglas, Behind the Candelabra
Matt Damon, Behind the Candelabra
Chiwetel Ejiofor, Dancing on the Edge
Idris Elba, Luther
Al Pacino, Phil Spector

Best Actress in a Television Miniseries of Movie

Jessica Lange, American Horror Story: Coven
Helena Bonham Carter, Burton and Taylor
Rebecca Ferguson, The White Queen
Elisabeth Moss, Top of the Lake
Helen Mirren, Phil Spector

5. Lea Michele on Ellen: “I’m just trying to do my best for him.”

Lea Michele has given her first TV interview after the loss of her fiancé and Glee co-star, Cory Monteith.

The 27-year-old actress, who was appearing on the show to promote her new single Cannonball, said:

I really feel like I’m still trying to figure out all of this.

It’s been only a few months, but my mom has experienced a lot of loss in her life and she told me at one point, she said, there is an empowerment that comes with grief, at some point you find it.

It’s very hard but you will find it and I think at a certain point you can choose to sort of fall from this or you can choose to rise.

And that’s what I’m just trying to do my best for him because I know that that’s what he would have wanted, and to just do my best and to you know, hopefully make something positive for where I go in the rest of my life.

Watch the whole interview, below:

6. Oprah: “If I had kids, my kids would hate me.”

In a recent interview with the Hollywood Reporter, talk show queen Oprah Winfrey has confessed that she has never viewed motherhood as a priority. 59-year-old Winfrey said: “If I had kids, my kids would hate me.”

Winfrey went on to state that her children would have suffered as a result of her demanding career saying that “something (in her life) would have had to suffer and it would’ve probably been them.”

She explained that she same rationale justified decision to never marry long-term partner Stedman Graham, explaining that if she and Stedman had gotten married, they “certainly wouldn’t have stayed married.”

However, Oprah has taken on a type of motherhood role though her Leadership Academy for Girls in South Africa. This provides her with a way to communicate and care for the girls, frequently visiting the school in South Africa and emailing the students.

7. The world’s top Tweets for 2013 show what we really care about…

Celebrity deaths and One Direction. That’s what got us talking on Twitter this year.

Twitter has announced their annual report on the top Tweets of 2013, and the results may surprise you.

The most retweeted Tweet of the year was Lea Michele’s Tweet thanking fans for their support through the death of her partner Cory Monteith, at 408,266 retweets. In 2012 the top position was held by Barack Obama, for his ‘Four More Years’ Tweet.

Second place went to the Tweet confirming the death of Fast and Furious actor Paul Walker from his official Twitter account, at 400,367 retweets.

However, while tragic celebrity deaths took out the top two spots, One Direction band members dominated the rest of the list, securing the third, fourth and fifth top Tweets of 2013.

Niall Horan’s 20th birthday Tweet was retweeted 375,000 times while Zayn’s photo of bandmate Harry Styles asleep scored 344,000 retweets. Zayn also received 336,000 retweets for his Tweet thanking fans for their congratulations on his engagement to Little Mix singer Perrie Edward.

8. Hands off The Queen’s nuts, you guys.

In the best story to come out of Buckingham Palace since… well, whenever Prince Phillip last opened his mouth, The Queen reportedly sent out a memo during William and Kate’s wedding asking the policemen on patrol to lay off her nuts.

The nutty revelations have come after emails sent by News of the World staff were read out at the trial of the (former) paper’s editor, Andy Coulson. The emails also revealed that Her Majesty really does love her nuts, saying that staff often leave out “cashews, Bombay mix and almonds” for her to snack on.

At first we were really confused by this story. But, then, we imagined our grannies having their nuts stolen by workmen in their houses and it all makes sense.

9. Another day. Another lot of Photoshop fails…

Pretty Little Liars star Ashley Benson has spoken out against the show’s latest poster. Benson shared this via Instagram:

And the fails just keep on coming. Upworthy has made this awesome GIF of a recent cover that Jennifer Lawrence did for Flare Magazine:

Ugh.

Here are some more Photoshop fails. You know, just in case your soul needs an extra crush today:

10. Sydney has a new breakfast radio team.

It’s official: taking over at Kyle and Jackie O’s 2Day FM slot are none other than… Jules Lund, Sophie Monk and Merrick Watts and Mel B. Yep, the Spice Girl.

The news was tweeted last night by entertainment writer Peter Ford, and Melissa Hoyer, the entertainment editor for news.com.au.

Jules Lund previously worked on the afternoon drive-home segment with Fifi Box, who will take over the Today Network’s breakfast show in Melbourne.

Sophie Monk joined the Today Network in September as a co-host for their weekend breakfast show with Dave Thornton. Mel B is a former Spice Girl who also had a stint as a judge on The X Factor.

Merrick Watt’s previously worked on the Triple M show, The Highway Patrol, with Julian Schiller and Rachel Corbett, however, it will not be returning in 2014.