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"Don’t hate me but… I made myself up for my post birth photo."

Some women are happy in oversized shirts and no make-up but not me.

Okay, let me just say this.

I hated being pregnant.

I hated it. I felt fat (and not just belly bump fat, legitimately I-think-I-am-the-size-of-a-whale fat). I felt bloated and my skin broke out massively.

I just didn’t enjoy it.

Don’t get me wrong, I loved that I was growing a baby inside me, but the physical transformation I just didn’t enjoy.

So when the birth was approaching I was thinking about two things:

  1. I want this baby out and,
  2. I want to look good.

Yes it was vain, whatever, I didn’t care. I had felt like absolute crap for almost 9 months. When this ginormous buddle of joy finally popped out I wanted to look half decent.

I think the whole thing started when my friend, who recently had a baby, confided in me that she hated her birth photos.

“But it’s a beautiful moment, isn’t it?” I asked.

“Sure, if blood stain clothes, no make-up and 36 hours without sleep sound beautiful to you. Then, yes, it’s beautiful.”

She went on to explain her angst.

“I hate the photos. I look like crap. I hadn’t dyed my hair in months, I had no make-up on and I was wearing a shirt 5 sizes too big for me.”

I get that you aren’t going to look like a super model right after birth but I thought to myself, is there any harm in helping the process? So I decided I’d primp and prime myself for the big day.

First things first. I booked a hair appointment.

And not just dealing with the hair on my head either.

No way was I having the baby without a fresh wax down there. The doctor does NOT need to see that.

I didn’t want to go overboard but I made sure I picked out a nice lip gloss and my favourite concealer to apply before the post birth shots. Even if I did have to endure the 36 hour labour like my friend, I could at least use make up to hide the bags under my eyes.

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"I just want my photos to be picture perfect."

I also booked an appointment to get eyelash extensions two weeks before my due date. I had to after another friend told me she had bothered to put mascara on but then she bawled her eyes out as she was so emotional and she looked like a panda in all her pics. That was not going to happen to me. The extension also combated the tired look.

It didn't take long and I felt ready for the birth, and the post birth photos.

Except there was still the matter of an outfit.

You couldn’t pay me to wear a loose man style shirt. I don’t wear baggy clothes normally, so why would I do it after I had a baby?

I picked a gorgeous little maternity camisole that I would pop on after the birth before the first photo was taken.

"I want to remember that moment forever, and not regret it."

When the day finally arrived I was well and truly over feeling, and looking, like a whale. We had a relatively smooth birth. As my little girl was measured and weighed I popped some fresh lip gloss on, dabbed the concealer under my eyes and pulled my camisole over my head.

My hair was freshly dyed and my eyelashes looked amazing.

The first photo of us together is of me staring at her gorgeous face. My eyes are popping.

And I don’t regret anything I did for once second.

It’s my favourite photo ever taken. We both look gorgeous.

Did you do any primping and priming before the birth of your child? Do you think it's neccessary?

If, like this reader, you have a dilemma that you would like advice about, please email [email protected] with Don’t Judge Me in the subject field. You will be contacted before publication, and your identity will be protected.

Want more? Try these:

The one thing proven to make childbirth less painful.

The “new” ancient birth trend coming to a maternity ward near you.

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