The scariest online personal ad you’ll ever read.

Looking for love? Bet you're not looking for this kind...
Looking for love? Bet you’re not looking for this kind…

 

 

By MAMAMIA ROGUE

So there’s this classifieds site in the US called Craigslist.

It’s basically an online space where people can advertise any and all things: stuff for sale, personal ads, available jobs, a cactus plant that looks like Jesus –  basically any of the random stuff that used to be in newspapers before people stopped using newspapers.

One of best sections on Craiglist is a tab caleed ‘Missed Connections’, where people can post ads looking for the stranger they think know they shared a brief romantical moment with.

It would be lovely to think that each of these ‘missed connections’ ends with two people kissing on a bridge in the rain, standing next to a precocious kid called Buster who’s playing Adele on a boombox.

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Unfortunately though, the world of Craiglist is a tad seedier than that, and most romance that begins on the site skews more towards the SAW franchise side of things rather than the Disney movie side of things.

Which brings us to ‘I want to waffle your wolf’, a Craiglist ad posted in ‘Missed Connections.

It’s an ad that has gone viral for being… Well… We don’t want to spoil it. We’ve provided a helpful breakdown so you can see for yourself:

“hi i am trying to find the man who works at waffle and wolf in williamsburg”

Seems legit. She saw a cute guy at a waffle place and wants to see where it goes.

“i am trying to find the man who works at waffle and wolf because you look so similar to my father. i lost my father in a drunk driving accident when i was 12 years old. but he has darkish reddish hair, wore glasses like you, and was thin. he was my best friend.”

Oh! Well, that’s a little too much information but it is kind of sweet that this guy reminds her of her dad. Right?

“i am writing to you because i know that he had a lover in new york. before he died, he worked for the ny times and would visit her. i only know this because because i found his travel receipts before he passed on and i threw them away so my mother wouldn’t find them. it’s too much of a longshot that we are siblings, but you look like him, which brings me to this…”

OMFG. Could this be her long-lost brother?!? Does she need a kidney or something? Or maybe she’s just a lonely gal looking for her family? This could be like the Craiglist version of the Mamma Mia musical! What comes next?!?

“my number one fetish is incest-fantasy.”

Hold up.

“i don’t want to have sex with my family…”

Wait… What’s happening?

“…but i like role-playing this fantasy. my boyfriend is not ok with it. i’m not 100% comfortable with it either. and i don’t know why it gets my off like it does. i don’t want to have sex with you, but i want to meet you and maybe have a non sexual encounter where you speak to me as my father and we can resolve my grief. if you are up for a sexual encounter, we can try that too.”

LucilleBall-WTF

Run, waffle-boy-who-looks-like-her-dad-but-could-also-possibly-be-her-newfound-brother/lover, RUN!

Here’s the ad in question, via The Daily Dot:

craiglist-incest

Yep. Definitely not a Disney-esque love story. Or maybe ‘brother role-playing dead father fantasies’ is totally his thing too and we’re all just being way too judgemental. Maybe they’ll live happily ever after.

Maybe.

Have you ever had a bizarre online dating/romance experience?

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