opinion

"My new family Christmas tradition might be offensive, but it brings the laughs."

Thanks to me, there’s a new tradition in my family: the cringy Christmas T-shirt competition.

If you’re thinking of adopting it, a warning. It will end in one of two ways. Either your family rolling around in fits of laughter, or them banning you from future events.

Here’s ho-ho-hoping it’s not the latter.

We started it last year, let’s just say Nan wasn’t a fan at first. Surprisingly it’s back for another year.

The brief? Wear a Christmas themed T-shirt on December 25 that is sure to make us laugh. The biggest laugh, wins. Sounds hilarious, right? What could possibly go wrong?

Google ‘novelty Christmas shirts’ and you’ll realise very quickly that this can get inappropriate, fast. Aunty Sue wet her festive pants.

Tees with slogans like, “It’s the most wonderful time for a beer”. I also loved “Sleigh my name, sleigh my name”.

Listen: Meghan Markle’s Christmas is about to get very interesting. (Post continues after audio.)

When I saw the slogan “I got Ho’s in all different postcodes”, I realised some of these T-shirts would quickly put you on Santa’s naughty list.

My family is a competitive bunch; I opened a can of worms. Christmas got awkward, embarrassing and hilariously offensive. Also, it was on for young and old. Don’t go thinking the kids were left out.

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Here are the T-shirts that were contenders in my families Cringy Christmas T-shirt competition of 2016.

Where are my ho’s at?

where-are-my-hohohohs-at
Image via Etsy.

When I think of you I touch my elf.

when-i-think-about-you-i-touch-my-elf
Image via spreadshirt.com.
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Well hung.

well-hung
Image via Etsy.
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Pull my cracker.

pull-my-cracker
Image via Etsy.
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Let’s get Blitzened.

lets-get-blitzened
Image via Pintrest.

Although "Pull my cracker" was a hit and some family members did get "Blitzened" to enable them to wear such offensive T-shirts... I'm proud to let you know, I won.

For those of you wondering what I wore, behold the greatest Christmas T-shirt ever and hands down winner.

Christmas t-shirt competition
Image: Supplied.
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If you dare, find these gems online at; Ebay, Etsy and Cafepress.

What’s your tradition at Christmas? Surely it can’t be as out there as Kristen’s! We’d love to hear about your family Christmas traditions in our comments below.

Kristen Henry is one half of The Kristen and Wilko Show on MIX 106.3 in Canberra. Follow her adventures at kristenhenry.com.au.

Listen to the full podcast here: