Warning: This post deals with sexual themes and is NSFW.
Whatever your burning sex or relationship question, sex worker and relationship counsellor, Madison Missina has the answer. This week, she discusses how to boost your partner’s confidence if they’ve been put down sexually in the past.
“My boyfriend and I have been together for about four months. Everything is great, but orgasms require a bit of work. We have a lot of sex, but only get to see each other a few times a fortnight due to work and distance.
“He seems to have issues from the past, he says he has a small penis, he doesn’t, it’s just a regular sized one. He also says that he can’t reach orgasm from oral sex.
“I think some of his issues are his baggage. He has had a previous woman tell him that they weren’t sexually compatible because he isn’t very good.
“I have never had issues before, I can have multiple orgasms regularly, but I am struggling. I really like him and don’t want this to become our issue.
“How can I convince him to relax and just let things flow?”
It’s one of the beautiful parts of our feminine energy that we want to nurture and mother others, we see their pain, their baggage and we want to help them sort through it and leave it all behind. Do you see the problem here yet?
When we nurture and try to help our partners with their baggage we are mothering. Mothering is the act of someone superior helping the inferior one out through guiding and caring. That is beautiful and meaningful when it comes to child rearing, when it comes to training a new employee but in relationships we really should be seeking out an equal power balance.
Top Comments
I think just because one person said he wasn't good in bed - well he may not have been good for her but doesn't mean he's not good for you. Just like we are all attracted to different people, and different people smell amazingly sexy to each of us (due to pheromones), same for sexual performance. Plus sex is a skill like anything else - requiring practice, technique, communication etc.
Good advice, plus I'd say get him to go see a sex therapist, or regular psych to work on his issues.
She really did a number on him, huh. When will people treat each other the way they'd like to be treated?
Are you serious: why don't you just get the scissors out instead and stop muckiing around!??!