Does the order in which I gave birth to my three children determine their personality?
Doctor Gail Gross, a Human and Education Expert and author who recently wrote an article for The Huffington Post, firmly believes that not only does it determine their personality, it also defines them.
Birth order is as important as gender and almost as important as genetics. It gets back to the old nurture vs. nature business. In my experience as an educator and a researcher, I know that no two children have the same set of parents, even though they live in the same family.
Why? Because parents are different with each of their children, and no two children ever take the same role.
If so, surely the size of the family is also is of consequence? If this theory is correct, then an only child for example, is going to be vastly different to say a child born into the Duggar family who at last count, had 19 children.
If we were to generalise though (and I’m about to) and compare Dr. Gross’ findings with my very own circumstances, a mother with three children, then I guess I’d have to agree with her findings.
Which are as follows:
First Child – The Achiever
The first child is, in hindsight, the one with the most amount of pressure applied upon them. It’s like they have a giant spotlight shone upon them by not only their parents but also their immediate family and close friends. Are they sitting up at 6 months? Can they walk by 12? I remember celebrating (and calling my husband) when I taught my first child to wink at me. TO WINK AT ME. The kid probably just had something in her eye.
This is the child that you diligently read to each night, record each tooth loss and seriously consider calling Mensa when they wave goodbye for the first time. Plans are being made for this kid and let’s face it; they can’t help but be aware your expectations. Even if by the time number two comes around and they are no longer your sole focus, they want to impress you. They will forever live to please.
Is my own firstborn testament to this? Well, the result of an E+ in Maths might suggest otherwise, however if you look at the A+ she has recently received in English, History Art and French, then yes, this may indicate that she’s just choosing to succeed in a different area. That and I’m about to invest in some heavy duty maths tutoring.
Number Two – The Peacemaker
To be fair, I am number two of two. I am or should I say I was, the peacemaker. I seemed to be a sounding board for all of my mother’s railings against the world and all of our family’s failings. Meanwhile I totally wanted to be a number three child, wild, loose and allowed to just part-ee.