Over the Easter and ANZAC break, we’re going to bring you some of our most popular (and our favourite) posts in recent memory. They are stories that made us laugh, made us cry, or made us want to pump out fists in the air. Enjoy.
I wish to start with the following disclaimer:
I love my girls; they are my everything. Especially since I’ve become a single mother, I have come to rely on them for certain things even more. They are good kids.
I just can’t be bothered parenting sometimes.
There, I said it. I know you know what I mean and if you don’t, send me your secrets, you wizard.
Yes, I love my glorious rat bags unconditionally, lights of my life blah blah blah, but on occasion, I just want to facepalm them both and say: “Not today.”
I don’t feel like enough of us admit that sometimes being a mother is just shit.
It can be lonely, frustrating, tiring and thankless. Of course it can also be exhilarating, rewarding and downright delightful. Sometimes I think I may explode from a love/pride combo. But that stuff is easy to talk about.
What I’m getting at is this: I think it’s ok to admit that your kids, can on occasion, PISS YOU OFF.
Sometimes my kids are jerks, but because of some weird sense of loyalty I don’t really admit that to anyone else. I am also guilty of gushing over every single crappy little thing they do. Until now. I’m putting an end to the lies!
I wrote the following memo to all children. Feel free to keep it to yourself or read it as a bedtime story to your cherub and/or cherubs. You can take the swear words out if you’d like, but I find some well-placed coarse language makes my kids pay attention. Here we go:
Em’s memo to all kids
1. What is with the drawing on every scrap of paper and presenting it like it’s a fecking Picasso? Is that a fish or a car? Either way, if you want it stuck on the fridge: do better.