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Avocados the size of newborns are growing in Hawaii and we should move there ASAP.

Fellow avocado lovers, smashed avo enthusiasts, guacamole addicts, I have news for you. Quite literally, BIG news.

And no, before you ask, it has nothing to do with buying houses.

Hawaiian farmer Kenji Fukumitsu (also known as avocado god) is growing some newborn size avocados in Hōlualoa on Hawaii’s Big Island.

Now, let’s just do some quick maths here.

The average avocado weighs in at around six ounces, palm sized and ready to spoon out on your buttery bread. Fukumitsu’s gargantuan avocados are a record breaking six pounds and two ounces. That’s approximately 16 times the size of a normal avocado, 16 times more green, mushy goodness.

That equals so much bloody avocado to spread on toast. Or buckets of guac. Pick your poison.

Even more unfathomable, he didn’t just produce just one, one off bundle of joy avocado. He has a tree that has been in his family for the past 80 years that’s been producing monster avos like these.

And here we have our normal sized avocados next to the six pound baby. (Image: Big Island Video News.)
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"We had so much, all falling down," Fukumitsu told Big Island Video News (BIVN) in an interview. "And the pigs eating it, so I share them with some of our friends."

Excuse me sir, can I be your friend?

“We didn’t think nothing of it,” he continued, whilst I watched the video drooling. “We just pick and eat it. And we sold some.”

Okay okay, so maybe they have quantity, but is it quality?

"If you eat it during November month, they're very watery. But after that, it's good."

Why are his avos so big? "That I don't know," was his stumped reply.

Maybe it's time for the rest of America to give Hawaii a ring to supply them with their whopping avos, considering there's a shortage since guac is the party food of choice for Super Bowl parties this year.

Hold my damn normal avocado while I book a oneway ticket to Hawaii to have a life supply of baby-sized avocados.


Actual footage of me in Hawaii. (via GIPHY)

My very own avobaby.

Or I can make an avocado edible house, then no one will say anything about avo-lovers not being able to have a house ever AGAIN. Now I can have both.