By EM RUSCIANO
Dear anyone outraged by Miley Cyrus,
I am outraged by your outrage and this post is probably going to outrage you also – so brace yourselves.
Admittedly, it has been a big few weeks for Miles.
She obviously has a bee in her bonnet about shaking the Disney squeaky clean image and announcing to the world that she is all grown up. I did that by having a 21st birthday party, she is choosing a route that involves twerking with dwarfs, violating foam fingers and gratuitous tongue gestures.
Each to their own right?
But today I wish to focus on her new video clip “Wrecking ball” as I feel that ALL the words have already been written about her VMA performance. It’s time for us to talk about something new. THIS:
The clip opens with some super-close-up delicate single tear crying from Miles (with strands of saliva hanging from her teeth to show she really means it).
My initial thoughts were: Miley has lovely coloured eyes, what is that shade of lipstick I need it and holy HELL her teeth are dazzling!
Then we move into some glamourous demolition action, while wearing white undies (sure, that may break a few health and safety rules if it were a real work site).
Then Miley pops herself onto a real life wrecking ball (I love a literal music video clip) and is shown both with underwear and without.
There is a bit of writhing in rubble and some interesting mouth action with a mallet.
Yes, the mallet could be a phallic symbol or it could just be that it was in her hands and she was going for sexy. OR Miley may just have a thing for demolition tools.
Stop it with the outrage because it’s boring and she looks good. From what I can gather, the song is about feeling raw and torn apart and I think Miley achieved that feeling marvelously. I am also in true amazement that Miley has NO thigh spread induced cellulite as she sits on that giant cement ball nude. You know what I mean, when you sit on something in shorts and you skin gets smushed and dimples appear. She is so damn pert.