real life

The 7 worst pieces of parenting advice I've ever been given.

I feel like I’ve been a mum for a long time.

Seven years of small people tugging at my pants wanting a drink of water, seven years of tiny toes poking pushing against my back in the middle of the night, seven years of snuffly noses and crayon drawings on the walls and seven years of advice.

There has been good advice that I couldn’t have survived without, well meaning advice that made me smile but I politely ignored, and, to be frank, a whole heap of shit advice too…

Here are the top 7 worst pieces of advice I was given:

1. Don’t pick your baby up much for the first few months or they will get used to it.

Can you imagine what you would miss out on if you followed this awful piece of advice? The rationale is that your baby will get used to cuddles and get spoilt.

I can’t think of anything better than spoiling your gorgeous newborn with cuddles. Milky warm sweet cuddles with the wonderous creation you have brought into the world.

2. Don’t make eye contact with your baby too much or they will be over stimulated.

This piece of advice is derived from a fairly controversial parenting book that I am not even going to mention because all it does is divide Mums into those who do and those who don’t.

We won’t even go there.

There may be times (like at 3am when you are desperate for a few moments peace) when it is appropriate to keep the lights dim and not gaze into the inky blue sea of your little ones eyes but don’t miss out entirely. There is a whole world of love in those baby blues.

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3. Stay at home for every sleep or they will never have a decent rest.

Things then get a little complicated when baby two, three or four come along and you just have to go with the flow. Babies will sleep in a car occasionally if they have to, they will sleep in a baby sling, they will sleep in a pram and they will be okay.

Don’t beat yourself up about going out and letting your baby learn to sleep in a different environment. You need a life too.

4. Give your baby only water at night after the first month and they will sleep through the night.

A very well meaning lady told me this “tip” when I was in the depths of despair with my colicky tongue tied baby.

Imagine the screaming of a hungry four-week-old if you followed this advice.

I smiled and desperately hoped she didn’t pass on her “good intentions” to too many other mothers.

5. Don’t let your children sleep in your bed or they will develop a bad habit.

It begins to happen after that transition from a cot to a big bed. Deep in the night you hear the footsteps, the pitter-patter of little feet sneaking into your bed and squeezing in, enveloping the warmth.

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My children can’t seem to help themselves, the allure of the big bed beckons them from their dreams.

It’s a privilege that won’t last forever. No teenager wants to get within 10 feet of their parents bed. So enjoy it while it lasts.

(All the while “sternly” reminding them of the “importance” of sleeping in their own bed.)

6. Shave your baby’s newborn hair all off so it grows “thicker”.

You are kidding me, right? I thought the first time I was told this little nugget of advice. People actually do this? Oh, the horror!

7. Don’t let your child crawl too early or pull up to standing, as it will damage their bones.

Okay, I am no doctor but surely everyone knows that kids crawl when they are ready. It doesn’t matter what the age is. If your five-month-old wants to crawl there is no point in stopping them. They are going to do it anyway.

They all reach developmental milestones at different ages and holding them back is only going to make for a cranky baby. Nothing more.

What’s the worst piece of parenting advice you’ve ever been given? Can you top these?

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