Tonight, two brave women — and a man who freely admits to abusing his wife — tell their story to Channel Nine’s 60 Minutes.
Trigger warning: This post contains details of domestic violence and may be triggering for some readers.
Every morning for years, Sharon woke with dread about what was going to happen that day. Perhaps she’d be choked again. Maybe, this time, her face would be smashed into a mirror. There was a chance a knife would be dragged across her throat.
This wasn’t an empty fear; these things have all happened before.
“I married a monster,” a tearful Sharon tells 60 Minutes reporter Tara Brown.
“If he hadn’t have gone to jail, I’d be dead.”
Sharon was abused by her then-husband Steve so many times that she “lost count” of the times he tried to kill her. Despite living in a perpetual state of terror, she explains it wasn’t as easy to walk away from the relationship as some would expect.
“The longer it goes on the more dangerous it gets,” a tearful Sharon says, speaking in an exclusive interview to be aired tonight on 60 Minutes. “It is safer to stay with them because you know where they are and you feel comfort in the fact that they know where you are. You’re not going to upset them by them not knowing where you are.”
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I was curious if he was violent with her when they were teenage sweethearts, as she she seemed to be surprised by his violence later, but they may have only been briefly together as teenagers. I ask this question because can a non violent teenager (if that was the case) turn into such a violent man?
Whatever the case it is appalling that this poor woman (and the other lady interviewed) had to go through such hell.
First you meet the Salesman and then, after he's sure he's got the deal, the Landlord shows up.
So no; while he's grooming the victim he's charming and persuasive. Once you're trapped, he exercises coercive control to keep you where he wants you.
It usually starts with emotional abuse, the whole "you're not good enough...You'll never find anyone else, this is it for you" ...When you're told that enough, you start to believe it's true, that you are better off with this person. That's when the violence starts, you dont leave 'cause you feel this is the best you're ever going to get. In the back of your mind you know it's not right, but maybe, just maybe you think you deserve it, you haven't been grateful enough, you havent tried hard enough... Then, it gets so bad you flinch away when he raises his hand, you almost expect it at the drop of a hat, It escalates, and if you dont leave by then, one of you will end up dead. The abuser may beat you to death, or you may snap and do something drastic to escape.
As others have said he doesn't seem to be totally taking responsibility for his appalling behaviour but on the other hand some of the things he said he seemed remorseful. I wonder if it is a case of that he knows he is wrong but can only partially admit to it because he can't face the full horror of his actions. Or maybe the whole thing, even the bits he seemed remorseful,are insincere. But if so I wonder why he decided to talk about it, I am curious as to what is his agenda?