It’s been a big week on The Bachelor.
Not only have there been intruders allowed into the house, but one of them seems to have actually won Sam’s heart. Competition between the girls is getting really tense – so tense, in fact, the roses on the platter at the rose ceremonies almost curled up and died out of sheer discomfort.
Here’s our weekly round-up of The Bachelor’s top Diamond Grade Moments – the Cringe-worthy, the Cute, the Cunning, and the Charming.
I have to say, one of the intruders is looking like a serious contender to take out the whole competition. Lana, a communications assistant from NSW, has really hit it off with Sam. After the friendly (and by ‘friendly’ I mean ‘horribly competitive and humiliating’) competition in which the girls had to show Sam their skills at coaching children in a PE lesson, Sam chose Lana to go on a single date. WOAH.
The old girls were NOT happy. Sam and Lana slow-danced to Jamie Lawson (he was there, live… Interesting career choice, Jamie) on a romantically lit deck. There was touching. There was deep eye contact. There was the exchanging of roses (well, Sam gave Lana one. She did not give him any. Rude). Judging by the look in Sam’s eyes, the other five girls were completely forgotten. Sam and Lana forevzzzz.
One word. Diamonds. GUYS. REAL DIAMONDS. Sam took sweet Sarah on a solo date, and before they could get down to the business of sitting on a couch with their own private opera singer as entertainment, they went for a little limo ride. Sam started reminiscing about an earlier beach date when Sarah had lost an earring and taken it like a trooper… and then he produced some replacement earrings.
Sarah was so excited about her fancy diamond present, she said “Honestly, I would have been fine going home after he gave me those earrings”, which makes me think she is my soul sister. Good priorities, girl. Jewellery first. Anyway, their date was pretty darn cute, with flowers including a special rose-ceremony rose, and a good ol’ fashioned make-out session.
During an artistic challenge, Heather and Lana were teamed up to make a sculpture of Sam sultrily laying on a couch (standard date, who hasn’t done that? Pffft). And their sculpture of Sam was… Creative? Interpretive?
Terrible. It was terrible. Fortunately, it was the good kind of cringe-worthy moment – the kind that makes you giggle with sympathy, rather than lean back with horror. Well done, girls. Whatever the opposite of ‘nailing it’ is, you did that. It was brilliant to watch.
Look. I don’t want to throw shade at Sam, but I think he cheated. He CHEATED, guys. In Wednesday’s rose ceremony, Sam was supposed to boot out one girl, as goes the romantic sentiment of the show. He narrowed it down to Sarah, Nina, and the second intruder Rachel. Three girls, two roses. And then he freaked out, got all sweaty and dizzy, left the room (while the girls stood gobsmacked), chatted to Osher, and returned with THREE ROSES. He got to keep all of his six girls. Hmmmm. Cheeky Sam, cheeky Osher.
But fortunately on Thursday, he remembered how to be ruthless, and kicked out intruder Rachel, with whom he didn’t seem to have any kind of connection with anyway.
What a week. My personal favourite moment was this quote from Rachel, speaking about the group date:
“I don’t want to stand with five other females and compete for a man’s attention, it’s just against every bone in my body.”
Ummmmmmmm. Don’t want to state the obvious, Rach, but… maybe next time you should apply for The Block.
Anyway. We’re really getting to the pointy end, now that Sam is throwing words like ‘future’ and ‘children’ and ‘home visits’ around.
Five girls left. Stay tuned.
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