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Botox.Filler.Glasgow 177x236 Needles are the new lipstick.

Botox

Needles are the new lipstick. Yes, while you were sleeping, female standards of beauty have once again shifted beneath your feet. Or rather, your face.  Somehow in the past few years, injectibles have become as common as cosmetics and it’s messing with my mind. Possibly yours too, even if you don’t realise it.

It’s not just Botox. Paralysing facial muscles with botulism is no longer enough. Now you must also inject fat “fillers” into lines, wrinkles and any bastard area on your face that dares lose its youthful plumpness. Even if you’re only in your thirties. Or twenties.

For some women, fat reconfiguration is virtually a fulltime job. If they’re not trying to strip it off their body, they’re sticking it into their face.

But here’s the worrying bit: if so many women are getting regularly jabbed but so few admitting it, how can we trust what we see on the red carpet? Or in real life?

It’s fairly easy to spot a woman who colours her hair and it’s a rare one who denies it. Most of us trade details of our colourists as enthusiastically as our nannas traded recipes. “You MUST go see Roz,” we gush. “She’s brilliant with blondes.” Sharing is caring. And deception is redundant. Who CARES if I colour my hair?

But there’s a conspicuous cone of silence over Botox and fillers. The vast majority of women won’t admit to having their face injected. Not to their friends. Not to their partners. And certainly not when they’re famous.

In fact, most women, if asked directly, will not only fail to acknowledge the role of needles in their beauty routine, they’ll actively deny it.

20081009 courtney 250x375 177x236 Needles are the new lipstick.

Courtney Cox admitted to using Botox but "very sparingly" compared to most.

So why have so many celebrities suddenly begun to confess? Not to fillers – not yet -  but to Botox. Jennifer Aniston, Dannii Minogue, Sophie Monk, Nicole Kidman, Cindy Crawford and Courtney Cox are just some who recently admitted to having botox. Co-incidentally, most of them insist they’re not doing it any more. And remarkably, most swear they only “tried it once” and didn’t like it. Ahem. Once?  A week?

Sorry, that was mean. But frankly, the lying is getting tired. We all have eyes and the signs of injectibles are becoming more recognisable as they become more ubiquitous and overdone. Stick whatever you like wherever you like it but please stop pretending you look that way because you drink lots of water. It’s insulting to the rest of us who try the water thing and find nothing changes except the amount of time we’re on the loo.

Of course, it’s not always water. Sometimes it’s “macrobiotic food” or “yoga” or my personal fave, “fresh air and laughter”. All fabulous but not an accurate description of your beauty routine if you’re also using injectibles.

Some of this comes down to semantics and your definition of cosmetic surgery. I’ve noticed that all the women who do have Botox and fillers define surgery as something involving a scalpel. How do you define it? Must surgery involve cutting? An anaesthetic? My litmus test has always been blood. Is there blood? Does something puncture your face? Then I consider it surgery. Or at least a cosmetic ‘procedure’.

Celebrities who squirm animatedly when asked about surgery and insist they would never cut their face often omit the fact their faces are pumped full of fillers.

sophie monk surgery 300x194 Needles are the new lipstick.

Sophie Monk, before & after

This is problematic. Not because every woman is not entitled to her privacy. I believe she is. And this is where my argument falls down a bit, admittedly. Even in my own head.

It’s just……well, what about the sisterhood? What disservice are you doing to other women when you lie about your life – pretending you don’t exercise or that you don’t have help with your kids or that you baked that store-bought cake from scratch or that fresh air is your beauty secret?

It’s a bit like celebrities who gush about their ‘miracle’ pregnancy at 48 when (in most cases) the only miracle is that so many people believe them. Obstetricians offices are full of anguished couples who had no IDEA it would be so hard to fall pregnant in their forties. “But Geena Davis had miracle twins at 49!” they insist. Sure she did.

Yeah, I know lying about your face isn’t as serious but it is crap for women’s self esteem which does it tough enough thanks to retouching gone mad.

But wait. I’m not writing this column from on top of a soap box. Maybe a shoe box. Or a matchbox. It’s not my wish to demonise anyone for doing anything to their face.  I know dozens of women who’ve used injectibles, I certainly think no less of them and one day I may even go there myself. It doesn’t make you a bad person, just a human one who’d like to see something different in the mirror.

I just worry that the line between natural and surgical is slowly being erased by a syringe. As Sophie Monk told Who magazine this month, “I get (Botox) around my eyes and my forehead. Everyone in LA gets it so it becomes very normal.” Is that the world we want to live in?

So. Just to recap. This is in no way a diatribe against individuals who choose to inject their faces with filler or Botox. What concerns me is the changing, not altogether honest standard of beauty. What’s ‘normal’ is changing. And now it seems to be including syringes.

What do you think? Have you used injectibles? Might you one day? How do we balance an individual celebrity’s right to privacy with the recalibration of female beauty?

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237 Comments so far

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    Penny

    I do it – I love it – I don’t care if you do or don’t do it. I care if you’re a nice, kind person but not whether or not you use Botox, fillers or anything else. My boobs and Botox are some of the best things I ever did and it’s no secret nor do I advertise it.

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    Brad Hollingsworth

    Yes, in fact I have had Cosmetic Injections. Botox and Fillers are a wonderful way to give the face more youthfulness. Many years ago I knocked out my front teeth and since then I have had them replaced by our local dentist (is this cosmetic work, well it is, Botox and Fillers are no different)

    I work every day liaising with customers and self esteem is a key element in allowing me to feel confident when promoting ones self. I used to be negative on Fillers and Botox but now I’m a positive.

    I‘ve been seeing Kas @ Renaissance Skin Care, they have rooms at Berwick and Frankston. I would clearly be happy to recommend her business, I wanted additional unit’s last visit and she pulled me back ensuring that I achieved a natural look. Ring Kas, customers 0417 309 872 for all your cosmetic needs.

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    anastasia

    it might not be the world we want to live in but sadly it is the world we are living in – this so called Celeb crazy pop culture makes out that if you are
    young, poreless, flawless and super thin than you will be happy – we all know this is not the case but it sadly doesnt register as
    clinging onto a youthful image seems the way society is heading – everything is geared towards the young – magazines, advertising, music, movies, fashion, pop culture…
    …i turned 40 last month and am now starting to feel more inclined to try Botox and Fillers only because it seems like its so common and popular that surely everyone and anyone is doing it so yeah I might give it a go someday…juggling part time work, kids, home, diet, fast paced life has taken a toll on my face so if the service is there and people are raving about it (not so openly) then sure I might try it someday…

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    the Original Camille

    When your 25 yo cousin has an arm amputated, your own wrinkles stop being much of a worry.

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    Liz

    I haven’t had time to read all the comments … so I’m not sure if this had already been raised. There is some quite compelling evidence emerging that the botulinum neurotoxin (which is all Botox is) can cross the blood-brain barrier (ie. the fabulous mechanism in our central nervous system that is designed to keep such nasties out of our brain). This article provides a lay summary of one of the studies published in Science
    http://www.newsweek.com/2008/04/12/a-new-reason-to-frown.html
    The FDA now requires the boxes of the injectible substance to carry a black box warning to this effect. I’m not sure how attractive the potential brain damage associated may be?

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    gogaino

    I truly don’t care if they do and lie or don’t and also lie.. if they want to spend their money and time that way, go right ahead.
    For me, the bigger issue is the long term effects of putting these chemicals in your body. We don’t know for sure what they are or what they will cause. Until we do, I’m happy for those women to be the guinea pigs!

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    Flutterby

    Sitting firmly on the fence that divides young and old (for me, 41), I understand the temptation and reluctance to indulge in a fountain of youth. I feel young, yet I’ve had a stressful life and am starting to get frown lines.

    The need must be even greater for models and actresses. Most have spent their entire adult lives under-nourishing and overexercising their bodies. The result of that on your face is NOT KIND. So, rather than striving for some normality, the answer would be to fix the problem rather than the cause.

    I’m struck by the thought that as I gain more character, I become less visible. Every year, I am accorded less and less humanity. I guess by the time I retire I will be able to haunt people, like a ghost.

    How horrible it must be for the famous to disappear?

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    Jessica

    I am in my late twenties and though I have not had botox done as yet, I have had other “procedures” done e.g. veneers, spider vain removal, laser hair removal and mole removal. I plan to have botox when I need it and I plan to have some surgery in the future. I have always taken pride in my appearance and find it so strange that so many women hate taking care of themselves and are proud of not doing anything to improve their appearance.

    In Europe it is normal for women to look polished and take care of themselves, as it is in many parts of US, it’s just here we regularly hear women boast about refusing to buy make up and colour their hair, proudly saying they carry an extra 20kg and refuse to do anything about it. I don’t get this, why is it that when we want to improve our lives in every other area we are encouraged to do so but if we want to improve our physical appearance we get judged so harshly by other women.

    I never want to become a frumpy overweight housewife so I am simply doing what I deem necessary to ensure that doesn’t happen. I am not sure what the old cliche regarding ageing gracefully means, I just know I don’t want to have breasts hanging around my knees and a face that resembles a shar pei. I do it 100% for myself, not for men or anything like that (I’m in a long term happy relationship) because I feel good when I look good. Simple as that.

    And in case anyone thinks people like me are just bimbos who only care about their looks, can I just add that I have post-graduate qualifications and work in cancer research.

    And no, I don’t understand why celebrities lie about their treatments and procedures when we all know that, with few notable exceptions, it is a requirement of working in Hollywood that you have a nose job, breast implants, botox and lip fillers.

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    Felicity

    To use my own lovely Mum as an example, she slaps on everything she can find in her bathroom cupboard (and that of the dermatologist!) to halt any signs of aging. I do it too. Yet she has a HUGE moral objection to botox, skin resurfacing and the likes. We always banter about this subject because I fail to see the difference between using lotions and potions and using something more “serious” in/on your face. The ultimate goal is the same, to look younger. I understand the invasive nature of the alternative procedures but this isn’t what bugs me or what draws the distinction; what bugs me is the fact that people rattle on about being happy to age gracefully yet 9 times out of 10 they are on the moisturiser, eye cream and anti-wrinkle cream bandwagon.

    Isn’t it essentially the same thing wrapped up in a non-invasive package? And therefore isn’t it slightly hypocritical to judge people for using expensive fillers when you are using their cheaper cousins and essentially hoping for the same result?

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      Ms. Butlertron

      I get where you’re coming from, but I don’t actually expect my moisturiser to do the same as botox. I expect it to moisturise and even out my oily T-zone. I’m happy to try and delay the signs of ageing, but I don’t really want to interfere too much with the process, if that makes sense.

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    Sharnanigans

    I have written my response to this article here
    http://www.sharnanigans.com/2011/02/mamamia-here-you-go-again/

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    grace

    I think Sophie Monk looks better in the ‘before’ shot!

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      the Original Camille

      i think the ‘before-shot’ looks faker than the ‘after-shot’. I reckon it’s a ‘between’ shot ie. she’d already had surgery. Those cheeks don’t look right.

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    Corinne

    I joke about using Botox, I have a few lines that could probably use it. But then I can’t really be bothered. The cost, the pain, the upkeep. I can barely keep my roots under control, let alone my wrinkles.

    Plus, I’m getting older, so what? Why does aging have to be this terrible thing? Why does beauty have to equal taut and line-free? Why is having a face that shows your age and experience a bad thing?

    I actually feel sorry for people compelled to do it and maintain it. But hey if they want to, go right ahead. They don’t need to feel compelled to tell me about it either.

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    katonamat

    See, this is why my girl-crush on Gwyneth Paltrow is justified. At least she admits that she gets botox, eats nothing and does 1 1/2 hours of exercise with a personal trainer to look like she does.

    You might think that sounds ridiculous, but all celebrities do things like that. It’s just that Gwyneth has the lady-balls to admit it.

    Unlike another favourite celebrity friend of ours… miss demi…

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      Elly Klein

      Heh heh – ‘lady balls’. :-)

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    Edwina

    I use botox and proudly tell everyone.I am 26 and started about 18 months ago. Yes I think it is a sign of the times that I want to do these and I’m sure my grandmother would not approve. But i havea stable income and am independant, I want to look great and botox is a gift to myself every six months. I think Gwyneth and courtney cox look fantastic- of course they are lying about using- but i definately hope I look like that when I am 40!

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      Tara

      So you started using Botox when you were 23/24??? That is so sad…I’m 22, and my number one skin concern is still pimples! I can’t imagine getting Botox any time soon. It’s a depressing world we live in if women in their twenties are worried about looking old.

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        Felicity

        I am 24 and still have the pimple issue but I have to say that I don’t see how our concern with pimples are any more justified than Edwina’s concern with aging. They are both superficial skin issues (if they bother you that is) that are able to rectified by modern medical intervention.

        Their seems to be a heirachy when it comes to visible skin problems (again, only if you see them as a problem!). Pimples are socially acceptable treat and I am going to go out on a limb here and say that you probably try to get rid of yours like I do with creams etc. yet when Edwina “treats” her concerns, she is sad and worried. Just a thought.

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          the Original Camille

          After 20 years of pimples, I discovered a magic combination:
          try Cetaphil, non-comodogenic facial products, non-chemical sunscreen (the one elle McPherson peddles) and mineral make-up! Pimples- be gone!!!!!

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          Anonymous

          Perhaps there is a hierarchy between pimples and wrinkly skin during people’s twenties because wrinkly skin really isn’t an issue for people in their twenties. I too feel it is sad that at 23/24 people feel the need to already get Botox.

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    Molly Rae

    To afford botox or any other cosmetic “procedure” I would have to go back to work and put my kids in daycare. Once you get botox done, I’ve been told you have to keep going. For me, I would rather stay at home with my kids and grow old gracefully, sure other women will look younger but they’ve paid for it so I won’t compare myself to them. If people tell me I look good I’ll be able to think “what a compliment” instead of putting it down to the poison injected in my face.

    I don’t judge others for having it done but I am saddened that it is becoming so common – I hate to think my daughter is growing up in a world where we place so much emphasis on looking good instead of being good, doing good or feeling good. People argue that if it makes you feel good then get it done, but for me I would feel sick at the thought of handing all that money over – but that’s just me, a non-paid stay at home mum who hope her smile will win people over, her wrinkles will put others at ease and her days at home with her children will not cause too many frown lines. Also, if I’m going to argue to buy organic milk despite the cost, I can’t then argue that I want to inject poisons and chemicals in my body.

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    Fashionista

    I think it is a worry that there is an insidious pressure for those in the movie/television business to “maintain” their younger looking self. What happened to your face gaining character?

    Me, I’d rather spend the money on shoes.

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    Safzoro

    I can’t stand looking at retouched botoxed faces. I met a doctor last year with a face that looked like a spitting image puppet characature, with huge puffy lips and no expression. She was a thyroid specialist with a side business in anti-aging procedures. It was ghastly, and certainly didn’t inspire confidence.

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    Cordeline

    I would consider ‘surgery’ to involve a scalpel – yes. Therefore I consider Botox to be a comestic procedure, not comestic surgery. It’s not like you can compare Botox to have a brow lift I don’t think.

    I’ve had ‘injectable’ treatment on veins in my legs (thankyou pregnancies). It was most definitely a cosmetic procedure, but not surgery – not at all.

    Why did I do it? Because when the veins appeared in many clusters on my legs after 2 pregnancies, they, quite frankly, made me feel miserable and extremely self-conscious. I certainly never kept it a secret.

    Yes, I did change the way I was looking from ‘normal’ self. I don’t apologise for changing my ‘normal’ self in this way. Not at all.

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    Kylie Andersen

    I can understand why Mia is somewhat to and fro on this issue. I definitely feel the pressure to look youthful and attractive and at 38 there are wrinkles and grey hairs appearing. But I also think it’s really important to face aging as a natural part of life, and perhaps something we can learn from. We each have to navigate this for ourselves though, so each to their own. For me, I am trying to cultivate the sense that the look of our physical bodies is not hugely important in the grand scheme of things.

    Full disclosure from celebrities is a bit of a vexed question as they’re not obliged. Since, at this stage, we do know what aging looks like outside of celebrity perhaps we should just assume that if they look remarkably young for their age it’s not natural and then we can choose not to buy into it.

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    Sophiebee

    Why should it be your business what I do to my face/body?

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    WhatSisterhood?

    Thats the most ridiculous argument – actually not quite sure what the point was but it seemed ridiculous.

    We must reveal our private information to make other women feel better? Was that it?

    So, does that extend to other areas of my life? Should i have to reveal my salary so other women can benchmark themselves against me? Should i have to tell whats going on inside my relationship so other women can assess whether theirs is normal? What about my sexual preferences? My political beliefs?

    What we share should be up to the individual, not an expectation or pressure to make other women feel better about themselves.

    I dont believe in the sisterhood – ive been stabbed in the back by women too many times.

    Self worth comes from within not by measuring yourself aganst others.

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    Nat

    I just want to look good for my age not 10 years younger. My mum uses creams from the dermatologist (which are so much cheaper and do more than those at the cosmetics counter) and looks great. She also does microdermabrasion which I’m going to do too when I’m older.

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    Lu

    I think the trick is for it to be subtle. If you can tell someone has had something done or looks different but you cant put your finger on what it is, they have gone too far or had a bad job. I would never do anything because I really cant be bothered and dont think I’m that vain. I have a friend who has had laser resurfacing on her face and she looked terrible and was in so much pain for about 5 days afterwards I would never want to put myself through that. She looks great now though.
    I am 41 and have been told by different people I look much younger. I put this down to the fact that I have fair skin so after one bad sunburn as a teenager (trying to compete with my gorgeously olive skinned girlfriends at the beach) I have always covered myself in sunscreen and if I go for a swim or to the beach I wear a rashie. Also I am not as obsessed as I used to be about being slim. I’m probably 10 kilos heavier than I used to be. The bonus of that is my wrinkles are filled out in my face! I know people who have botox and they all work hard at being skinny. I think if they relaxed more, ate more and put on a bit of weight the wrinkles they are trying to get rid of would be gone anyway.

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    Alana

    ‘Recalibration of female beauty’ is a great term. I think it’s also a recalibration of age. I was watching Joan Rivers on TV one day and I was thinking ‘yeah, she’s 70′ and then I thought hold on my Gran doesn’t look like her!

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    Laws for Clouds

    I’m too scared to get it done. If people with all that cash and access to the greatest surgeons and dermatologists can come out looking like that, what results am I going to get at a botox party in hicksville?

    As far as celebrities go, keep it to yourself if you want, but don’t outright deny it. Just go with the Kylie Minogue line ‘Beauty secrets are called that for a reason’.

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      rene

      I completely agree! If they don’t want to disclose their beauty secrets then that is fair enough but it is the outright lying that irritates me. I have always admired Kylie Minogues answers when asked about her beauty regime :)

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    Georgie

    I think a major concern is the extent to which we are becoming obsessively concerned with altering our appearance to great extremes & especially so with females. We feel this “need” (not a “want”) to spend stupid amounts of money on something that quite frankly does not make u happier, is an ongoing struggle, is more than a monthly wage for most of the worlds population & is making plenty of predominately white males extremly rich… It seems us westerners are getting more & more out of touch with reality & what they are getting sucked into buying…

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    L.

    So basically this is what you’re saying
    -Women get botox and injectables but don’t own up to it and are therefore skewing the concept of what is ‘real’ or ‘normal’
    -But women should be entitled to their privacy and shouldn’t have to share their little beauty secrets if they don’t want to
    -But celebrities should be honest with us because they’re deceiving the sisterhood and insulting us all.
    -But I don’t think of anyone less for having it done, in fact, I may get it done.
    -But Botox is becoming normal (according to Sophie Monk) and do we really want to live in that kind of world?

    Sorry but its all a little back and forth isn’t it. Like an argument with yourself, or like you just wrote down your stream of consciousness.

    Women are entitled to their privacy but not celebrities and not about things that are ‘sisterhood issues’? Who decides what these issues are that are so vital that celebrities don’t have their right to privacy anymore??
    Nobody is 100% full disclosure with the world about everything, not even you Mia. Sure you may tell your closest friends but why is it the worlds business if women have a little ‘refreshment’, have hired help with their children, their house, their lives in general?

    I think personal privacy and the ability to disclose the amount of information you want trumps the ‘sisterhood’.

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      Anonymous

      Exactly right! Well said!

      It’s nobody’s business what a woman does or doesn’t do to look/feel better! By judging them on their choices – to tell or not to tell – flies in the face of so-called “sisterhood”!

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        Anonymous

        Well written and opinion stated. Here here

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      Lu

      but I think the point she was getting at is that when they are asked if they have had any work done and deny it when its obvious they have had lots of work done, they must think we’re stupid or blind to believe them!

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        Jayne

        But frankly, its such a rude and intrusive question that, I probably wouldn’t answer it honestly either (particularly if you knew the answer would be broadcast around the world). It’s no one else’s business what work they’ve had done and they are under no ‘duty to disclose’ to the public.

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    Margi Macdonald

    Did anyone else see Helen Mirren on The Graham Norton Show on Saturday night? A famously sexy woman, Ms Mirren’s face is exquisitely wrinkled, her demeanour impish, charming and graceful. Her hair and clothes were a knockout. She’s 65.
    My hope is that each of us could be that comfortable in our own skins.
    As for the Botox and filler-revolution; I have a friend who’s a Family Lawyer, she’s seen a lot of unhappy people in her time, and has noted that many fixed-face-folk have set their faces to display an equanimity they probably don’t feel.
    For me, I miss the tiny cues and non-verbals that a fully expressive, malleable face presents to the world, and I’m really interested to know if a few social scientists have studied the communication and interplay that occur between people with fully expressive faces, and those whose faces don’t express every nuance.

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      Nadia

      Yeah, go Ms. Mirren! Too true, she looks amazing.
      Maybe because she has no children! ;)

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    Elly Klein

    I wonder what a 2011 version of Mel and Kim’s hit 1987 song would sound like:

    Take or leave us
    Only please believe us
    We are never gonna be… injectable

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    Gig

    Trout pout, frozen forehead; I know you wouldn’t expect me to understand, so what happens when after having all this crap injected into your face, you actually do age? Which you will eventually. Do the chemicals and animal fat, that animal fat you were so careful to avoid in your diet, do they affect your ageing in an adverse way compared to a woman who has had the grace and courage to grow old with dignity?

    If men suggested you do this to your bodies, you would be livid, ‘what inject our faces with animal fat so we look younger?’

    For those of you that do indulge in this bizarre treatment, what do you think of pics of movie stars with trout lips, and frozen foreheads, unable to smile or laugh? Doesn’t this register with you?

    Or are you in denial, ‘it won’t happen to me’. Funny that Nicole and Melanie paid a lot more than you, and they suffered the side-effects bigtime.

    Nobody, not men, not women, want to see people they care for injected to within an inch of their life just to pretend they are younger than they are. It’s an embarrassment, a travesty of life, as Benita mentioned earlier. Life is to be revered, not kicked in the face with the futile vanity of animal fat injections.

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      Gig

      PS or btw

      older people with botox or cosmetic surgery don’t look better, they look ‘rearranged’, it doesn’t fool anyone, and I reckon everyone would be happier if they stood up and said, ‘hey, I’m old, get over it!’

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      For Crying out Loud!

      agree… but (big big BUT) if it makes YOU feel better about yourself, then that’s the only thing that matters, I believe. Not if you are doing it to “fool someone” or to make yourself believe you are younger, but as Mia said, to feel a little more confident or prettier, or whatever, then what’s the big deal?? their face, their choice! and if you dont agree with that, then… oh well… who really cares?
      The lying about it, on the other hand, yes, THAT could/should be criticized, but the decision to do it, i dont see how that’s your problem.

      btw, no, i do not have surgery or botox or fillers of any kind, but do not judge in any sort of way anyone who does.

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        Crikey

        Melanie who?

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          Happymum

          Melanie Griffith.

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        Lulu

        “if it makes YOU feel better about yourself, then that’s the only thing that matters”

        Well, yes & no. A lot of things which people do ‘to feel good’ aren’t healthy for them. And (speaking for myself) some of us don’t like being lied to.

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          For Crying out Loud!

          If you read, I stated clearly in the end that the lying part is what I also dissaprove of. And I dont think botox or fillers are unhealthy unless they are taken to the extreme. But thats just me.

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    Ms. Butlertron

    Ingrid Bergman in ‘Murder on the Orient Express’ at age 59. She won her third Oscar for the performance too.

    You’re welcome.

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      Ms. Butlertron

      And again in ‘Anastasia’ at age 40/41. She got her second Oscar for this one.

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        Ms. Butlertron

        And just for a comparison, here she is in ‘Gaslight’ at age 29, for which she won her first Oscar.

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      rainbow

      a picture is worth a thousand words

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      Lulu

      Exactly, Ms B.

      The other day I watched “The Mirror Crack’d” on TV, starring Elizabeth Taylor. She looked middle-aged – because she was. Beautiful, glamorous, all of that – but middle-aged. Not immobile, frozen, waxen. That film was made only about 30 years ago, & something seems to have changed so much & so quickly since then.

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        Lee

        But Lizzie was already up to facelift number 3 at that stage !

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    Georgia

    I’m currently 20. I’m really scared about what ‘normal’ will be when I’m 30 or 40. Like, incredibly frightened.

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    Alyssa KT

    Some friends regularly have “injectibles parties” and are constantly inviting me.
    Which I actually find insulting.
    But I can’t tell them I’d never do it and why because then they’d be insulted.

    Why is it suddenly so trendy and acceptable?

    And am I going to look older than them in ten years? Hard to say yet, I’m much happier finding out for real though. No to fakeness.

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      Daniella

      What the hell is an “injectibles party”?!? Does everyone sit around with Champagne injecting each other??!

      :O

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        AlyssaKT

        I will never know for certain, but I imagine it’s a lot like a makeup party, with one “qualified” person doing the injecting of one person at a time (like a demonstrator at a makeup party would apply makeup one person at a time) while everyone sits around getting a little drunk and telling each other how good they look/will look…

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    Crocodile skin

    I have always been of the opinion that I would never want “plastic surgery” as I grew older. I am happy to get wrinkles and age gracefully and whilst I don’t begrudge movie stars doing whatever it takes to stay in the game, I have always felt sorry for those who have gone too far..they obviously see something else when they look in the mirror (Priscilla Presley comes to mind).
    However..(am in tears writing this) I am 53 years old and in the past 6 years I have gained about 15kgs in weight and then lost it again (not sure if that has anything to do with it)..I am now the fittest I have ever been and eat more healthily than I have ever done. But… The skin on my arms is like crocodile skin, leather, wrinkled beyond belief. I am so conscious of my arms now, so embarrassed. I have never had great skin, but it has become so wrinkled and withered that my arms look like that of a 90 year old woman. My 80 year old mother-in-law has much much nicer looking arms than me. I find myself checking out the arms of every woman I see..I am devastated and would not hesitate to have “something done” to them if there was something to be done and I could afford it. I don’t want them to be like a 20 year old’s arms..I’d be perfectly happy with a 53 year old’s arms.
    I feel so fit and healthy..the best I’ve felt for years..but I am devastated that this physical defect is upsetting me so much.
    I can’t wait for winter so I can cover them up. I wish all I had to worry about was a thin upper lip (have one of those) and a frown line…(have quite a few of those!)

    As for the celebrities..they can do whatever they want as long as some magazine doesn’t tout them as looking “so fabulous” at 64 ..when they’ve been helped considerably along the way.

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      Crikey

      I guess that’s the fine line isn’t it…I use botox because I’ve got abnormal frown marks in between my eyebrows – abnormal beyond my age so I have botox to make me look my age (and less angry – I don’t want my kids thinking I’m constantly mad at them when I’m not.) Are procedures OK for those with something abnormal but not for those who look perfect? How do we know these celebs don’t think that they look abnormal?

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        Lulu

        But if botox use becomes routine, then ‘normal’ aging will look abnormal.

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    ber

    I understand those that believe this is an individual’s personal choice or that who’s had work done versus who hasn’t is not a topic worthy of discussion… but I do worry somewhat that, by normalising what is, in many cases, quite traumatic procedures that have varied results, we are promoting the idea that natural is not fine. In many cultures, women succumb to quite debilitating physical procedures (foot binding, neck rings, lip stretching) for the sake of an imposed beauty ideal. Should we follow suit..? I don’t think so.

    Unfortunately — whether it’s fair/logical or not — celebrity comes with a certain burden of responsibility. Men and women alike compare themselves to other men and women. As a woman in the public eye, is it helpful to advance an unachievable physicality on the one hand and pass it off as good genes and kittens and fresh air on the other? I don’t believe this does a whole lot for the empowerment of, and camaraderie among, women.

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      ber

      I’m sorry if my first sentence doesn’t make much sense. I’m a writer – for shame! – but I also have arthritis and am on a lot of pain medication at the moment. Fuzzhead galore!

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    SA Belle

    When did looking your age become so passe?
    Teenagers who look 30, and older women with less lines on their faces than my 3 year old….

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    Melissa

    Have done Botox. Have used Restalyne in my lips. Have openly admitted to both when asked and also openly shared with close friends when I wasn’t asked. Isn’t that the real issue here – the strange need to cover up the facts? What’s the go with lying about it…very strange…

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    Anonymous

    I’m not for botox or injectables and focus on being happy and confident in my own skin, but gosh, sometimes it’s hard to stop comparing oneself, botoxed or natural…

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    Rosie

    I too struggle to figure out what problem I have with this “trend.” Am i jealous? Am I mad they don’t admit it? Why do I even care or notice??? It drives me mad! But after watching Nicole Kidman on 60 minutes tonight, I could not take my eyes off her disfigured top lip, and I started to realise my problem with it all…..THESE CELEBRITIES WERE BEAUTIFUL IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!!! I think they are crazy to mess around with beautiful features! Especially when they put stuff in their lips??? Like the only part of their bodies that can’t be skinny is their lips??? Slap on some red lippie and smile with confidence and I am sure everyone will think you are beautiful!

    This reminds me of an episode of Oprah a little while ago…Her guest was an actress who was famous decades ago and then she ran away from the spotlight… She honestly looked like the make-up team had deliberately aged her, you know with like a rubber mask and heavy, dark, crackly foundation…. I was having trouble figuring out if this was the case or if it was real??? I soon realised it was real, and it looked so shocking because we do not see celebrities who have AGED physically on TV anymore. I couldn’t believe how ‘odd’ she looked on the shiny screen without a shiny forehead and with “wrinkles” (I feel like this is a dirty word?!!) I then realised how odd it was that I was shocked! How accustomed I am to not seeing a person who has let themself age naturally??? It certainly is a strange time we live in…

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      Rosie

      PS. I also find it frustrating that when these “actresses” smile, the only thing that moves is their mouth widens, and their eyelids close. That’s it. That’s all that moves. Then when they cry, it’s pretty much the same. And also when in labour….same. I don’t want to see a movie void of expression!

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        Anonymous

        They also tend to be vocally hyper to cover up the fact that their face doesn’t move!

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      Carolyn

      Yes to this, we have come to expect the shiny waxen face of women of a certain age in Hollywood in much the same way we have come to expect a certain size. This is where the danger lies, normalising something which should have us terrified.

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    Lorrae

    Almost overnight, at the age of 43, I developed a crease on my chin, which I called my cranky crease ( as it seemed to appear after a couple of depressive & challenging months). I decided to try Botox. That was 3 weeks ago & I came out of Clinic with not only chin full of Botox but lips plumper with fillers. I’m going back in 2 weeks for some more. I happily told my close circle of friends I was doing it & those that know, noticed the difference. Others just thought I was “looking good”.
    Do I feel better? Yes ( even if the crease still needs more fill). Time will tell whether I continue with it – big test will be whether I can still kiss – ha :-) )

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    snarkle

    You know, my first thought was “Oh here we go, women will write about Nicole Kidman” and sure enough, post #1 was first cab off the rank.

    As long as Hollywood or wherever insists that the fountain of youth be the one we all long to drink from, noone over 20yrs old will admit to using because it means that they are not confident of getting parts or attention on their own merits. It’s beyond normal – it’s become a rule of the game.

    Full disclosure: I’ve used botox and fillers a number of times, and had a lower eye job. Did I tell myself it was to feel good about myself and not to bend to societal standards? Hell yes. But I was a model at the time and I saw bookings go up when I did it, and down when I didn’t keep up the botox. It fed the idea that it was necessary, absolutely. Like getting your roots done.

    Using botox and fillers is 100% about staying competitive as a woman – be it against other actors, model or celebs; or against other women in the dating world, or against whatever image you have in your mind of what old age looks like. After all, isn’t it “better” to lie ‘up’ about your age and have people tell you that you look much younger?

    Get it done if you want, or not – but don’t kid yourself people can’t tell. You’d be surprised the number of men who have no laugh lines anymore on TV…it’s not just the women!

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    anon

    I wish women who get injectables realise that when their faces match their genitals it’s time to STOP. That joker smile is HORRIBLE. Trout pout is just gross, their faces look like their labias. yuck

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      Bo

      Sweetheart, I don’t know why your labia looks like an over botoxed face but maybe thats something you need to sort out privately? Personally I never see a woman with botox and think “OMIGOD – she stole that look from my vagina!” but hey thats just me :)

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        Ness74

        I read this and ended up having to clean my computer screen.

        Note to self: don’t drink water whilst reading Mamamia comments!

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        anon

        huh? Take a look at the sophie monk photo above. her lips look like her labs. As do a lot of women/actresses with injectables in their lips. Injectables don’t neccessarily mean botox, they also include restalyn and other shit that goes into mouths and cheeks. i never said botox.

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          Bo

          Sophie Monk is one woman, she doesn’t represent ALL women who have had injectables. As to your other comments, I was clearly taking the piss because I think you’re being really narrow minded and rude about people who choose to have cosmetic surgery. If you don’t like it – fine. But keep your harsh vagina comparisons to yourself, thanks.

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            anon

            *rolleyes* I can’t believe I have to explain this to you. Sophie Monk is a mere example of a growing number of celebrity women whose mouths resemble their labias. Should I stat a complete list? Melanie Griffith, Meg Ryan, Christa Miller, Hunter Tylo, Lindsay Lohan, Jessica Simpson (though she seems to have calmed down on it), hell Nicole Kidman is heading that way with her upper lip bursting out. Crikey, no one can make a joke without people saying I’m wrong. Open up your friggin women’s magazines or just turn on your tv.

            I AM right, there are women like that. It is an observation and they do look like that. it’s hardly narrow minded

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              Bo

              I totally agree that *some* women take it too far. But you lumped everyone in the same basket with your overly emotive comments. As for taking a joke? Ummmmmm……I’d say you’re the one that can’t do that :)

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            anon

            it’s also LABIA not vagina and my original comment said that women STOP before their faces resemble their genitals. sounds like you’re protesting too much because you do get them and are being overly sensitive

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              Bo

              I don’t get them actually. I already have big lips that I inherited from my Spanish background – which look like labia according to you!! Maybe you’re the one that thats overly sensitive about your looks – after all you’re the one attacking women who choose to have cosmetic work to feel better about themselves. Get a life!!

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              Anonymous

              Gee why does everyone beat up on people for having an opinion on this site. Anon had an opinion and she is entitled to it without being beat up on. So sick of reading comments and people getting attacked for them on this site. Love the stories but getting really sick of the nastiness.

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          SSS

          I presume you’ve seen Ms Monk’s ladybits, then, have you, to make the comparison?

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            snarkle

            Was going to say, mine don’t look like that at ALL! Would be an enormous help to have all that padding should I get a dose of ‘roids though! LOL

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      Me

      agree

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      redballoon

      Well, labia is just latin for lips, so…

      (btw labia is already plural)

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      Felicity

      Haha… I thought it was funny ;-)

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    Ness74

    Nope, never been ‘botoxed’ or ‘filled’ and don’t plan on ever using them either.

    I love my character and laughter lines (although I am very lucky, because at almost 37 I have a relatively wrinkle free face), but as they start showing up I will embrace them as they show life experience (sad and happy).

    I don’t care if people want to use them, but it is not my thing, the only thing that concerns me is all the filling, paralysing, tweaking and tucking is creating a whole lot of people that all look eerily similar.

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    Bo

    God, we love to judge don’t we?

    I’m 21 and I’ve had fillers. Sue me! (but my only assets are a pair of louboutins and a cute, if demanding, cat).

    I got them under my eyes because I have always had really pronounced circles under my eyes no matter how much sleep I get or what I’m eating.

    I got them because it was something I was teased about when I was younger and I wanted it gone. They were quick, painless but very expensive (about $700). I loved how they looked and I would get them in a heart beat if I could afford it again. When I’m a bit older I probably will have botox. At the moment I’m supporting a friend who is considering getting a boob job. If it makes her feel good about herself, who the fuck cares?

    All of you pointing the finger and making nasty comments let me ask you this: do you colour your hair? wax your body hair? wear fake tan? use “anti ageing” moisturiser? wear makeup? have hair/eyelash extensions? If so, why are you allowed to be “vain” about having these things and demonise people who have botox? For the record I think too much surgery is terrible and celebs lying about it tacky (and yet you “couldn’t understand” why Nicole Kidman inspired so much vitriol Mia? hhhmmmmmm)

    When I have mentioned the possibility that I may be getting jaw surgery (which would involve 9 months of braces) on MamaMia I have received many supportive comments urging me to do it. Yet if I’d written in for advice about getting injectables as a 21 year old, it probably would have been met with shock, horror and patronising comments.

    Let people do what they want with their own bodies. I’ll never do something to myself that I consider unsafe – I’m not silly. And I’ll never look like Michael Jackson. But aside from that if it makes me feel better about myself then I don’t see how its anyone’s business but mine.

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      Anna

      Im 25 and have had botox injected to elevate my brows and juvederm injected in my top lip.

      I dont feel at all compelled to justify my reasons to anyone.

      Its so easy to be judgemental of others choices when its regarding something you wouldnt personally do. Most of us are guilty of this.

      For this reason I dont give consideration to anyone elses views on injectables any more than I do to someones opinion on the way I dress.

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    WillaWay

    I actually find the new normal scary. Scary that women in their 20s are doing it. Scary that I will look abnormal in some professional and social circles, and soon, if I choose not to do it. I might be treated like a grandmother, someone who doesn’t take enough care with their looks, someone who doesn’t care about their looks or is letting themselves go – because I don’t want needles in the face and neurotoxin in my NS.

    Is anyone else scared about becoming a dinosaur? How much money are women spending on manicures, pedicures, facials, hair, injectibles each month. More than I earn, I think, in some cases.

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    Benita (MissBenben)

    NOT.EVER. Not even remotely close to being on my radar. I’ll be 34 in a couple of months, and I am getting crows’ feet and some wrinkles on my forehead. But you know what? I look at those crows’ feet and it reminds me of all the sleepless nights I spent up feeding my babies. I look at my wrinkled forehead and recall the pangs of worry when my firstborn went off to school. And when one of my kids makes me laugh, or a friend rings with good news, I know the lines around my mouth will be on show for all the world to see. My face is my life. Every triumph, every sadness, every sleepless night watching my babies sleep (or watching my babies cry endlessly :p)is etched on my face and I will never erase it.
    It’s funny – I live out in remote western Queensland. Because of the harsh climate, a lot of women (and men) look older than we are. But when you see them, with their weatherbeaten faces, crows’ feet and laugh lines, it just adds so much warmth and character to them. Their face tells a story. I love that about people. Faces are such beautiful things.

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      Gig

      Beautifully put, Benita.

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      Anonymous

      I am from the country too and the difference in emphasis really helps you to see the difference in priorities we now place on image – vanity used to be seen as a ‘vice’ – I believe in the power of image too and doing things that make you feel good but let’s face it, and I have got caught up in it in the past too, it’s not character building, takes a lot of energy and mind space to pursue, and it’s energy we could be using elsewhere. In terms of what really makes us happy you won’t find cosmetic procedures on the list of essentials

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    Bradley

    This gave me a laugh the other day. I visited a local shopping centre only to discover that a gym has opened up right next to McDonald’s !

    You can sit there, scoffing down facefulls of Big Mac’s, fries and coke whilst watching the aficionados pump iron. I don’t know if the close proximity is meant to make you feel guilty because you’re eating the burger or superior because you aren’t.

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      Shannon

      Haha! I thought it was bad that ours opened up *next door* to Maccas, but right in front? Everyone can look at each other and enjoy some mutual judgment. Harsh.

      But clever. I bet a lot of people join those gyms after seeing it while in the Maccas line and feeling guilty. At least…two girls from my work joined because of that.

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    Bradley

    Look….I’m beautiful. So what if my mirror keeps on saying otherwise !

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    I don't get it

    I really don’t get it. What does it matter if someone lies about their ‘beauty routines’ or whether or not they exercise or whether they have help with their kids or whether they’re passing off shop-bought cake as home-cooked? To me it seems like the problem is with the people doing the asking. Their need to know someone elses business so they can compare it to their own. If people weren’t so hell-bent on comparing themselves to others it wouldn’t matter if someone looked better then you and claimed it was natural or coped better than you with daily life while lying about not using childcare. It makes me very cranky, this whole thing of constantly comparing ourselves to others. It doesn’t bloody matter, none of it bloody matters. In my opinion.

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      dearestdear

      great observation….after commenting earlier today on this story I thought some more about it & came to exactly the same conclusion…we only care about others “cheating” because we are comparing ourselves to them & feel they have an unfair (undisclosed) advantage…cakes, botox, parenting….

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    Skye Pallin

    Who cares? This is secret women’s business and a personal choice. That today our soul-starved level of sensationalistic journalism revolves around banal headlines of who hasn’t had this or that, bottoms photoshopped vs untouched etc betrays what was once sacred sisterhood business. I think it’s unfair to compare procedures/cosmetic surgery of the average Australian woman to insecure OTT Hollywood actors – it’s not comparable. So why would you decide to expose such a story in national press for both women AND men to read? In a woman’s mag, OK. But does my husband really need to ask me “Honey, have you ever had any fillers? What are they? I’ve just read this article and it says most women deny it.”. Do I lie that I choose to do a little bit of this or that at the age of 48 to look better? Mia Freedman, you should try discretion, more considered thoughtfulness and the ramifications of your opinions instead of being such a tiddle-tat. I think it was wrong of you to publish this when you should’ve given it more time and more thought about the consequences to well-balanced, healthy, beautiful Australian women who choose to age gracefully – with a little bit of help.

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      Hmmm

      You ask who cares, and it seems to me that you do. A lot. It’s the women who are open about it who don’t particularly care what people think. Why should it be secret? Why shouldn’t it be discussed? There are many things done to women’s bodies because it’s become “normal” and some of them absolutely need to be challenged and discussed. We cover things up when we feel uncomfortable about them. I would HATE my partner to be using botox and fillers and not telling me about it. What next? A solo holiday and coming back with a new face but denying she’s had surgery? It is deception at a most fundamental level in an intimate relationship.

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        Melissa J

        Well there is a big difference between not telling your partner you have had plastic surgery/procedure/whatever, and not telling the entire world. I don’t think it’s covering things up to not want the whole world knowing your business. But not telling someone who is a big part of your life what is going on with yours seems like there is a bigger problem than just that.

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          Hmmm

          The original post implied that some women don’t tell their life partners about botox and fillers and that Mia shouldn’t have raised the subject in such a way that it could lead to awkward questions being asked. But I respect honesty in my close relationships. I agree with you about not needing to tell the whole world if you’re Jo/Joe Bloggs. Celebrities who deny getting anything done are pathetically transparent. There’s an argument that as long as we can see through them, what’s the harm? Unfortunately I’ve had personal experience of a gullible person being badly affected by believing such claims and refusing to listen to logic and reason, so I’m not quite so “What business is it of ours?” about it.