Ugly enough for you?
By SARAH WILLS
I like big knickers.
Quite frankly, the bigger the better. They must be cotton with full-coverage and a broad gusset. I prefer neutral shades of beige and white (which eventually end up an attractive shade of grey). The only aspect of whimsy is stretch lace instead of firm elastic, eliminating the potential for the dreaded muffin top.
Once when I had a couple of girlfriends visiting, my husband walked outside with the washing basket (+10 points) and asked for help to hang my undies (-10 points), whereupon he gleefully used six pegs for each pair (-157 points). What. A. Catch.
Anyway, back to the point. Open my undies drawer and you’ll find:
- eight of the above described: two white, two beige, two pink (a mishap with red pants thrown in with a whites-and-lights wash), one grey, and one black.
- one pair of large black light control tummy-suckerinerer undies. (Note: light control.)
- the pair my husband will never ever in a million years see: industrial-strength beige tummy and thigh control pants, which I have only worn twice for black tie occasions. (Umm, under my dresses of course, not as my formal wear.)
You will not see any G-strings, French cut duds, hipsters or bikini briefs. Once upon a time, however, they were all in there in a rainbow of colours. They had tags that involved secrets with Victoria, and being in a state of pleasure. Did I mention that my current array have all been purchased at Target?
What I want to know is when did this happen to me? I admit I’ve always been a fan of cotton (c’mon, ladies, let it breathe), but when did the size and shape move from scant to scary?
“Once upon a time, they were all in there in a rainbow of colours.”
While I’m on a roll, I should also confess my favourite bra is a nude maternity bra. I’d have no problem with this…if only I hadn’t stopped breastfeeding 14 months ago.
New clothes purchased are billowy, sometimes with elasticised waists. In fact, they’d be perfect for any subsequent pregnancies. My own mother told me to throw out all my three-quarter length pants. The other day I couldn’t be bothered doing my makeup and hair so I threw on some workout clothes and pretended to have just been to the gym – problem solved.
Oh, dear. It’s official: I’m stuck in a clothing rut.
My previous wardrobe, which has been stored in our spare room since 2010, is filled with lovely designer dresses, pretty tops with belts, high-waisted trousers, and stilettos galore. It’s not that they don’t fit again, they (finally) do. The problem is my current knickers, maternity bra, and free-flowing garments are all so comfortable.
Is this a temporary wardrobe malfunction of first time motherhood? Will I grow out of it?
Make me feel better with tales from the dark side of your underwear drawers and ‘mummy wardrobe’, please!
Before commencing her own breeding programme in 2011, Sarah Wills spent 10 years working in PR following years at university studying journalism and theatre (as you do!). Currently a mother of one, Sarah knew she was a grown-up when her favourite shows became anything at 8.30pm Fridays on the ABC. You can find her blog here.
Comments
45 Comments so far
Cotton g-strings. Live in them. Still sexy yet comfy. Must be sure the waist is stretchy and doesn’t dig in. I would wear nothing preferably, but because I probably should, a cotton g-string is the winner. I own nothing else!
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I will tell you one thing I found I needed to change after having a child. Is panty liners – I do not know what those miniscule things are supposed to cover but if you find the panty liners just too small, I recommend the black and Gold label you can get from Food-works or IGA.
I also went through a stage of granny bloomers and it was quite frankly because I didn’t feel good in the others. Not comfort wise or appealing and once I not only lost weight but toned up I started going back to them.
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Before kids I didn’t own anything other than matched sets of knickers and bras, post kids I’m happy if I can find a clean bra and undies. I still cringe at the memory of taking our newborn and 3 year old to target for some new maternity bras and having the talking one announce to the world ” look how big these are” while holding said bra up.
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I wear Bonds cotton hipsters & have for ages. I wore them before during & after my pregnancy. It’s only the size & the colour that change. When I was a new mum with PND, I decided I needed some new underwear within that first year. Now my white ones had gone a bit grey & the beige ones weren’t looking much better so in my infinite wisdom I decided to purchase grey undies because the great thing about grey undies is that they can’t go grey. They are already grey. Underwear draw imitating life/mental state!
Recently I decided that some of the grey ones were looking more threadbare plus bait too roomy, some got turfed some kept for period days. I bought the next size down in some different colours. Now I own blue & teal & pastel pink with mint green band, bright floral with yellows, pinks, purples & greens. And I do wear them all & they do give me a boost because they are so colourful.
What gets worn rarely are the lacey ones but hey, my libido is so low that these only get pulled out for special occasions anyway!
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I’ve never been one for particularly fancy, girlie clothes: be they bras, undies or heels. First and foremost, it’s gotta be comfy!
One of my girlfriends (a few months after her first) said to me, “Now I understand why you’ve always looked a bit daggy. Danni, why didn’t you tell me how much more comfy these sort of clothes are?” Ummm, I did. It’s just that now you’ve grown a bust (she went from an A to E cup during pregnancy), you understand what I’m talking about.
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I wore g strings in the 90s when the tops of them went up to your waist. They were bloody uncomfortable then and I gave up on them fairly quickly.
I wore daggy undies when my kids were little, but as they’ve grown, I’ve gone back to decent undies. Maybe not all lacy, but still nice ones, not just big beige/white.
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Sarah, all of my fun, old-life clothes are housed in the wardrobe in our spare room. I call it the skinny museum. I like to visit it sometimes and think of how glamorous i must have been, back in the day. I am currently pregnant with our third and have basically lived in maternity wear for 6 years. But after a girlfriend of mine told me that she had to throw out all of her track suit pants as she realised she was dressing like her toddler, I took a good look at my wardrobe too. Gone are all the grey undies, sure the new ones are big (massive even) but they’re not threadbare. I also bought some nice maternity bras and knicker sets from lovable (practical) and hot milk (sexy but still mat. wear). I still wear way too many slip on shoes and the heels are well gone and i do tend to put my pjs on just after I have dinner at 5pm, but am trying to have something of a normal wardrobe. I look harried and exhausted enough, my ‘giving up’ wardrobe just added to it tenfold.
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Yes, holidays can be so much harder than being at home especially with 3 kids. Thought out the year try and get some short refresher moments to keep you a bit charged. Good luck.
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As a mum of 3 kids 5 years and under, I have 3 undie draws (areas), 1/ everyday wear (very comfy and in attractive), 2/ my in between pregnancies and lost all the baby weight draw, and finally 3/ the sexy one, which hardly ever gets worn. As much as I hate my everyday undies, they are really comfy and I love my life.
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Ok three things;
1. My mother-inlaw bought me pretty and sexy undies for Christmas (this was not my only present).
2. A client (and friend) was asked the other day by another school mum… why does that mum wear gym gear all the time ( I’m a PT, no excuse really I have time to change but choose not to.
3. After changing out of my work clothes the other day I walked into the loung room to tell hubby I was ready to go (we were taking miss two into darling habour). He looks at me and says… You need to o shopping!!!!!! I had showered and changed, but into a clean set of gym gear!!!!!
Reading this made me think about the above three events… I think I also need help!!
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I don’t mean to be rude in any way, shape of form.
But this is my worst nightmare realised
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Don’t worry, because if you ever get here, you really won’t care.
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The only time that a knicker drawer scares me is when I look down and see numerous skidmarks staring back at me !
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I have to use more Napisan on my husband’s undies than the kids’ undies!
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I’m waiting to read what Bradley has to say!
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Yes to comfy cotton undies as a first time mum! However I have worked in underwear stores and have a draw full of ridiculous knickers I just can’t seem to part with (or wear)!
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This happened to me when I was pregnant. I continued to wear the massive Kmart undies long after baby was born. I would still wear them now (& sometimes do) but my husband HATES them. Big knickers are sooo comfy. This article made me laugh. I’ve also done the work out gear thing. You are not alone!
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I have one white bra and one white pair of underpants. All the rest of my underwear is black. I have probably thirty pairs of Bonds hipster microfibre underpants and about twelve almost identical black bras. The microfibre feels really nice, and I’m not doing the hipster thing for sexiness (if anything, it looks the opposite at the moment), but because I find it more comfortable.
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Do you wear white clothing? I find that having a couple of beige undies and bras helps with white/pale clothes.
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I have about 12 pairs of identical black knickers as well, and the same bra in both beige and black. I also have 4 identical sports bra, 2 white and two black.
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I am with you on the nanna pants. It sounds like your husband and you have found other ways for fun with knickers! And there is nothing sexy about g strings on post pregnancy haemorrhoids.
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Get out of my undie drawers!!!
Two kids, two years apart has seen my self-assessed sexy factor plummet. Bonds maternity bras, suck your guts in nanna jocks, breast pads, I’m the full spectacular.
I’m hoping I’ll get my sexy back at some stage but for now with what im dealing with, I’m considering it a victory if my nanna jocks are clean
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Jacqui… As well as nodding along in silent agreement to Sarah’s piece, you have made me laugh out loud… Couldn’t have said it better!!
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Lol I love this “The other day I couldn’t be bothered doing my makeup and hair so I threw on some workout clothes and pretended to have just been to the gym – problem solved.”
Sometimes I do this too ! Thinking it is a great idea because then I can exercise ‘later’ and it’s so comfortable! And I am 23 and not a mother!! I also wear comfortable undies most days but do have some g strings and lacy numbers for special occasions
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I like being a ‘grown up’ favourite shows ABC Friday night! Never fear re underwear – I have all the cotton basics – & was happy about it – but the last 12 months have become addicted to the sexier styles. Age of kids I think is the reason. Once they stopped lounging all over me 24/7 (which was fine at the time) – I started to feel my body was more mine again… and so came the nicer underwear (still prefer cotton knickers) & clothes.
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i buy a 10 pack of full briefs for $9 at BigW (lots of pretty colours though- so thats something!) and have really taken a shine to those crop top ‘ahh bra’ style bras.
before children i had lots of pretty lace sets of matching bras and knickers. now it is about feeling comfortable rather than pretty. oh well.
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Three years after the birth of my DD I am somewhat embarrassed to admit that I am uncomfortable unless I am wearing sucker in undies that go from under the bust. All of them black and all from Nancy Ganz, Miraclesuit and Spanx. (Miraclesuit are the best ones) I have several pairs and wear them every solitary day. I always like to wear an attractive lacey bra on top. I seriously doubt the husband would notice one way or the other but it is for me that I wear them – not him. My fake abdominals I call them. Prior to childbirth I wore plain black cotton bikinis from M&S so I guess it has changed for me too… just not in the same way as other commenters.
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I’m the first to admit I have a thing for granny undies. Love the SHIT out of them, so comfortable! I’m in my early 20s and while all my bras are really pretty and lacey, I’d prefer to wear comfies any day
I dunno what it is… but I adore ‘em! Wear them with pride, I say!
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Before I had kids I never wore a bra, had fantastic perky boobs, and only ever wore the tiniest of g-strings. After kids, I need a construction harness just to lift my boobs above my belly button!! But I still try to buy matching underwear sets (the undies need a bit more coverage these days!) because I feel more ‘put together’ in pretty, good quality underwear.
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What is this magical comfy maternity bra? I’m trying to buy some now and so far I hate all of them! Help??
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Hi Preggo,
It’s from Target. (Surprise, surprise!) No underwire. Slight padding. A little nude flower in the middle for a spot of fancy
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Target hey? I’ll have to drag my gigantic self there and try some on. Thank you!
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Let me tell you a story about Target maternity bars which are seriously the best. I only bought one prior to my first bub as my boobs didn’t grow too much prior to his birth and I thought I’d wait unit l saw how big they got before buying another. I had this naive vision of taking my cute sleeping baby out to Target to buy more in the days after his birth. Little did I know I would be 11 days in hospital, in horrible pain and barely able to breathe for 6 weeks (before I was allowed to have my gall bladder out) or that milk would get everywhere and I’d need another bra! So, I asked my (very shy) husband to go to Target and buy me another couple the same. He was so worried about getting it wrong that he had the good idea to take a photo of the one I had (while it was on me) and then take himself off to Target. Can you imagine how he looked – this big tall man wandering around the bra section consulting his camera? He was mortified and terrified he’d be kicked out for being some kind of pervert!
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there is a brand of maternity wear called hot milk-very stylish and pretty-rarae for maternity bras-try looking for a stockist online but make sure you get fitted properly
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I wore Lovable maternity for both my pregnancies. Very basic, no frills, no padding, soft cotton, super comfy. I also bought a couple of Elle Macpherson maternity bras, not as comfy but very pretty. Keep shopping, you will find something that fits and feels good!
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To make you feel a little better, although not about the undies issue. I’m 18 and a lot of my favourite shows are at 8:30pm Fridays on the ABC.
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I say enjoy while it lasts
It’s nice to really not give a carp what you ‘should’ be wearing, as underwear or outerwear. I’m almost positive you won’t feel this way forever – there will come a time when you want to feel like someone new and different, you’ll chuck out your billowy things and cotton knickers and go for a completely different look. In the meantime, it’s low maintenance and gives you plenty of brainspace for enjoying your little one/s!
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This sounds like I could have written this. I went out for the first time post-baby, and wore a ‘proper’ bra instead of a comfy feeding bra. I felt so great. Hopefully this means I am at the transition point and some of my pre-baby clothes, and panties, start to make an appearance again. But make-up, hair and jewellery…..lets just take it one step at a time
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Oh darling we must be twins. 16 months after my first and i can’t quite put away the comfy maternity bras and giant Best&Less undies. I have recently bought a new underwire bra and it is a boost literally and confidence-wise to have my rack restored to it’s former heights.
Thanks for the great article.
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So timely Mia. Spent a week on gold coast with the family (3 kids) and was exhausted from all the stimuli! It’s funny isn’t it how we can struggle with just relaxing on hols and doing nothing and yet it’s really what our bodies & minds often need so that we can return feeling refreshed rather than worn out! I managed to read 2 great books which I thoroughly enjoyed and yet still craved the routine of home life.
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I love this story ! I have 3 children, 4, 1 and 10 weeks old, l feel like this has been me For the last 4 years !! I am very hopeful there is an end to this phase too ! I was at the park with my sister a few weeks ago in my trackies and loose t shirt – she was wearing a cute country road dress, bright sandles, jewellery – hair done and light make up – I said please tell me you are going out – no just an everyday outfit – she has 4 kids ! She said l will get there – so l am clinging to that hope for now ! Thanks for your story – made my day !
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I have 50 – yes, 50 – pairs of cotton knickers. They’re all from the same UK shop. All of my underwear is plain and I like it that way. If your bum isn’t comfy you’re doomed.
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Don’t despair! You will grow out of it. 18 years after my last baby, I’ve now rediscovered hipsters in a riot of colours, lacy bras and other things I hadn’t worn for ages!
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35 years after my last baby, I wouldn’t be seen dead in baggy panties! G’s for me, matching bras
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When I bought my first batch of maternity bras/undies/trackies , my husband looked genuinely confused when he asked if my grandmother was coming to stay for the weekend. LOL
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