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Coco Chanel may wish she’d kept her mouth shut. Or at least issued a caveat.
“Before you leave the house, take one thing off” the iconic French fashion designer purred. And it’s sound advice. Less is more. Except perhaps when you’re wearing less in the first place.
Go to any club on a weekend and you’ll see them. Young women all dressed the same – flashing the flesh. Big hair. Long nails. Barely there skirts. Plunging tops.
Young women wearing their sexuality with gusto.
The question is, is there anything wrong with that?
News Ltd columnist Angela Mollard says you bet there is. And that if these women are chasing male attention, the ‘blow-up doll look’ is the wrong approach to take. In a column entitled Dress to Impress, she writes about how a 25 year old bloke (looking for more than just sex) might view the passing parade on a Saturday night:
Angela Mollard
‘So what do I see? Blow-up dolls – hundreds of them. All Kim Kardashian look-alikes, with their upholstered chests and hair and eyelashes stuck on with glue. I see cleavage and thighs and – as she downs her fourth vodka – other bits I really don’t want to see.
They’re funny, these girls. Smart, too. But they look and smell like sweaty sausages sprayed with perfume, and they’re deck-stained to the ankle.’
Angela admits that coming from HER mouth, such words sound distinctly nana – esque. But she makes the point that blokes see exactly the same thing. And in many cases, they don’t like what they see – which wouldn’t be a problem at all except that the girls in question by their own admission, are often dressing specifically for male attention.
Taylor, ‘the one who likes dogs’
Yes, [men] do love a molten leg and a short skirt, but those trotters you can’t walk in even when sober need to go. Ditto the hair extensions. Seriously, guys want freshly washed, soft and beachy. You know the chick Zac Efron falls in love with in The Lucky One? The blonde in denim shorts and gumboots? The one who loves dogs? Her.
They like personality and quirkiness but not fierce. Yes, you might like fierce, your girlfriends like fierce, and you’ve been raised on Rihanna’s brand of scowly sexual liberation, but the guys? They like Pippa Middleton’s bum – even though they’ve never seen her bum, only the outline of it, in a bridesmaid’s dress, no less …
… If you’re any sort of feminist, here’s where you shout, “Who cares what men think? As if we dress for them!” And, no, you shouldn’t. But surely gadding about like Barbies at a Hugh Hefner pool party, your self-worth as deep as your spray tan and barely a bra strap to distinguish you from your friends, is as big a travesty to your smarts and imagination.
Come on, girls, you’re 20. You’re not supposed to conform to some tired template of flesh, tramp-stamp and silicone. You can annoy your parents with something better than that.
Read Angela’s full colum here.
It’s a tricky topic to navigate. Should we be judging young women on the way they dress? Encouraging them to ‘put it away’? Or instead allow them to explore their sexuality?
But how did ‘exploring your sexuality’ become so widely translated as ‘dressing like a porn star’?
Comments
156 Comments so far
People should stop worrying so much about what other people dress and look like and worry more about starving, homeless children.
Who cares about what makes us different from one another?
Why not focus more on what makes us similar?
We are flawed, human, and there’s a lot of people out there who need help.
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Women say they don’t want to be thought of as ‘meat’.
So please explain?
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A lot of the comments I have read have either defended the clothing choice, hated it or just don’t care. But, I’m just wondering why they can’t help find alternative options or add onto to the fashion trend.
For example, I’m 18 and I was finding it hard to make sure I dress within the “unwritten” dress-code for girls clubbing while not showing off my figure too much. However, I’ve found ways to make it more “respectable” in other peoples eyes such as wearing bike-pants under my dress or doing a few checks before I go out – such as bending down to see how much my dress rides up.
I know that I would probably be labeled as a whore but I like dressing up in clothes that I would never be able to wear in other occasions. And to those who my insult my intelligence or accuse me for just dressing up to attract guys, I’s just like to say that I already have a Diploma in Nursing.
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Can we stop with the obsession with what other women are wearing? I don’t know or care what motivates other women to dress the way they are in the picture accompanying this article (a picture that is endlessly irritating by the way).
To address something that’s come up a lot in the comments, it’s also incredibly problematic to attribute low self esteem or low IQ to someone depending on what they wear. Very articulate people have already spelled out why this is so elsewhere in this post so I’ll take the more direct route: when I was suffering from severe, self-esteem-shattering, depression, the kind of depression that would lead me to take desperate risks, have panic attacks in cars, drop out of contact with my loved ones for weeks on end etc, the last thing I’d have done was wear revealing clothing. For the simple reason that my skin was covered in fresh, self-inflicted, wounds. Now that I am recovered and the scars are fading (tanned skin actually helps me with that, but that would make me another Kardashian-esque clone, right, Angela?), I feel comfortable showing my legs and arms again. For me, sometimes, revealing clothing is a powerful reminder that I no longer have to hide my entire body to avoid awkward questions, and that’s a really positive thing in my book.
I couldn’t care less what a hypothetical 25 year old man thinks of my legs in high heels and nor do I care what other women think either. I do, however, care that posts like this force scrutiny on women who are deemed by the faultless moral standard that is the News Ltd opinion page to be publicly performing their sexuality. And from there you’re only one half-hearted hop away from “what did she expect was going to happen, going out dressed like that?”. Not okay.
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well said Stolichnaya! Exactly what I’ve been thinking and trying to say too. We as women say all the time, “a woman can do what she wants, be who she wants to be etc etc etc”. And then as soon as women start wearing what they want, doing what they want, the judgmental comments start. According to them, she can wear what she wants within reason, otherwise They’re going to brand you a slut, easy, cheap , a blowup doll, and whatever other derogatory name they can come up with. It drives me a little nuts.
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It’s nobody’s business how someone dresses and why and whether or not it’s going to attract them a mate. If it offends your eyes, look somewhere else.
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With all due respect Scarlet, you’re a little off target.
Sure, dress in whatever you like, but there are still social norms to adhere to.
For instance, some of these girls show way too many bits. Would it be ok for a man to have his penis visible? Or would the sisterhood be shouting about sick weirdo’s exposing themselves? The same standard should apply. I’m no prude, and I appreciate the female form immensly, but really, the way some girls dress leaves nothing for the hookers to wear.
It’s also about being appropriate, if you’re at a nudist beach then it’s creepy to have a fully dressed person there. If you’re at the opera, it’s creepy to see an ultra short miniskirt and hooker heels or a bloke with exposed undies.
My biggest issue however, is that alluring is sexy, not showing bits can be incredibly attractive, but glorified flashing is just cheap and nasty.
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Screw social norms!
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Actually, in my experience, the dress code at the opera in Australia is pretty relaxed. Provided people have proper opera etiquette (which is really just “shut up and turn off your cell phone”), I don’t know whether that many patrons would really care that much. Personally, I would much rather sit next to a girl with micro mini skirt and towering platform shoes than a well dressed lady who reeks of cigarettes (I can tell you from experience, it is hard to appreciate an aria when you are overwhelmed by the smell of stale smoke).
As for your comparison between “skanky” clothes and exposed penises… When I see young girls walking around with no skirt or trousers and no knickers and there is completely exposed vulva in play, we can talk. Until then, I think your argument is a bit of a stretch. Also let’s not forget that in summer, blokes can get away with wearing footy shorts and no top in a lot of public places. Meanwhile, if a girl was to do the same, she’d probably be asked to leave or told off by the police.
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What is interesting is that I can’t imagine anyone EVER writing an article questioning the appropriateness of what men wear and their motivation for wearing it.
Imagine it: “Dudes, do you have to look so skanky? Imagine what women will think of you”.
I’m not saying the questions the article raises aren’t valid. It’s just worth considering why these questions still mainly apply to women.
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My biggest issue with guys would be when they don’t button up their shirts! Its like they think they are Fabio…. And guys don’t listen to advice so no one tries
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Is that because we tend to assume that guys are skanky? That as a general rule, they are happy to have girls hit on them, or they are looking to pick up? I don’t think I’ve ever heard a guy complain about being harassed by girls on a night out.
To be fair, I think we do still judge men’s appearances. I’ve had many jibes at male colleagues for dressing too metrosexual – getting manicures, spending more on clothes than I do. Things I rarely judge other women on (at least not in the same way).
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Have fun.
Wear what you want.
I have only just begun doing this and I honestly wish I’d been told years ago!
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As the mother of an almost 15 yo, I’ll share with you what I tell my daughter. I had a rite of passage into womanhood as she will. I was and continue to be fashion conscious and most would call me stylish (even my daughters do believe it or not). But when we go out and I see girls / young women with their bits on show, I ask her the question on whether it looks “good”. Generally, even with a generation gap that can exist she sees what I see – most often a gorgeous young girl who, because her clothes are that “little bit” too tight, too short, too transparent transcend that point where they’re looking “on trend” to looking trashy and skanky. I tell both my daughters that whether it’s right or wrong, whether we choose to accept it or don’t, the reality is that the world does judge. I don’t necessarily advocate uniformity but I do encourage them to understand that what we wear is our individual way of projecting to the world who we are. I hope that with some honest dialogue both my daughters recognise that a skirt so short that it exposes their underwear or even worse – butt-hang and a top so loose/ so low / so tight as it shows your mammary glands and make-up / body products so orange as to make you look rather ridiculous isn’t a good look for anyone. I don’t mock those who do dress like this, rather I feel wonder if they have a positive female role model in their life who can help them to navigate the very fine line between contemporary and fashionable so their natural beauty and attributes shine as opposed to looking “just wrong”.
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It’s a really slippery slope when we start to judge other women, particularly over what they wear, to when they become legitimate excuses for other people’s actions e.g. rape, catcalling, assault.
Yes, I’ve worn dresses in the past that I now would regard as tops. Whatever I wear or have worn, I bank on other people’s decency to control themselves and not judge me or catcall or rape me. It’s as simple as that.
My self-worth is not linked to how much clothing I wear, nor is it linked to how people perceive me. And the idea that I should dress appropriately to attract the right kind of man?! That is insulting on all levels.
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I think there is way too much focus on moderating women’s behavior and dress.
Why do we never explore why men find scantily dressed women as so sexually attractive? From my experience sexual attraction for men can be way more complicated than just seeing a girl in a short skirt.
Why does that never get the spotlight? It is always put on women. I think its about time men took some responsibility for the fact that by objectifying women’s bodies they are doing themselves no favor at all in the long term.
I really cant help but think of Amanda Todd. As a teenager she was desperate for acceptance, love and attention and looked to the internet for it. She was told she was stunning or something of the sort. Then due to that she flashed her breasts.
When are we going to see the connection between the intense laser focus we place on women’s looks and what damage this does to girls and women’s self esteem?
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“Why does that never get the spotlight? It is always put on women. I think its about time men took some responsibility for the fact that by objectifying women’s bodies they are doing themselves no favor at all in the long term. ”
Uh, this is a woman telling other women to basically stop wearing skanky clothing. The majority (90%+) of the time I’ve heard someone complain over what a woman wears, it was from female lips. Guys were too busy drooling or not caring.
“Why do we never explore why men find scantily dressed women as so sexually attractive? From my experience sexual attraction for men can be way more complicated than just seeing a girl in a short skirt. ”
Because the body parts are kept covered most of the time so it sexualizes them when they are shown and there is probably some degree of natural biological sexual attraction to certain body parts such as breasts, hips, buttocks, face, etc.
Women’s fashion is largely argued n debated by women, the majority of responsibility for policing women’s fashion I dare say is on women’s shoulders. I’ve never seen men care all that much compared to women on average. The men I’ve known in particular are too busy admiring her looks or what she does vs her clothing, hell if she has a nice car that will get more attention than her dress.
It’s normal for men to be visually attracted to overt sexuality as it is normal for women too. Why not ask yourself why women are purposely dressing to impress so much? Are they after a specific form of attention or do they simply like that attire? I don’t see why you’re trying to imply blame on men for this unless men are out there telling women to wear it, en mass.
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All I will say is that I really hate those denim shorts that are in right now, the ones that have the shape of swimmer bottoms where the crescent moons of the bum hang out the bottom. I was standing in the line at the ATM at breakfast time on a Sunday and was confronted by a lady’s butt cheeks!!!
I hadn’t even had coffee yet!
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My partner hates them too. He doesn’t understand the logic behind them.
“You where pants to COVER your butt… don’t you? Isn’t that the whole reason? To cover your arse!?”
They confound him, poor love.
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First impressions (impressions generally) are important. As much as one wants to believe people don’t judge a book by its cover – of course they do. Plus who wants to look like a street walker. There are beautiful, flattering clothes that don’t result in one looking like a dumb tramp (yep, that’s the look – one might say “hot” and you might have the IQ of a genius – but to most it says “tramp”). I really don’t get dressing in tiny, tight clothes but then again, I’m 45.
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Who says they are dressed like a street walker? Do street walkers dress a certain way?
And if you are 45 then your childhood spanned from 67- 83, which means you spent your young adulthood during the 80′s. Have you forgotten the fashion?
There is nothing around today that wasn’t around when you were young. Nothing.
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Umm, been up the cross (as in Kings) lately? I’ve never lived in Sydney and even I’ve seen how the street prostitutes dress and yes they usually dress in skimpy, revealing clothing.
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I thought the article was harsh. No one wins when you use words to bring people down ie, tramp-stamp, trotters, blow-up-dolls, upholstered chests.
I have found that life becomes a little easier when you take the time to walk in someone else’s “trotters”. I believe love is a huge motivator for most people’s actions.
This fashion is a trend set by celebrities. Take a look in any women’s or men’s magazine.
These girls are not harming anyone or anything. Maybe just your eyesight perhaps… but that is your issue.
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I personally wouldn’t dress like that but I don’t see anything wrong with it either. If you can buy these clothes in stores then they must be on trend and teenagers/young adults have been following the latest ‘trends’ for decades….I mean the 70s, 80s and 90s were filled with fashion faux pas. I also think it’s a bit of a stretch to say that these girls are dressing this way to get a boyfriend. To me this is an absolutely ridiculous notion and the assumption makes me angry because it is reflective of the outdated (or maybe not so much) view that ‘a girl’s only role in life is to find a man that she can eventually marry’…Ridiculous!!! And the statement that all men like the ‘freshly washed, soft and beachy’ look is a bit of a generalisation, isn’t it? How would you even know?! I really do believe these girls are going out dressing like this just to have fun and be young! Surely you guys can remember what it was like to wear something that your parents and every other adult absolutely despised. It’s part of the learning process and I can assure you in 10 years time they’ll probably be cringing at their outfit choices too. Leave them be!
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Legs or cleavage, not both is the rule I’ve always followe
Being one of the not much cleavage and the quite nice legs, legs are always my go to. Some might classify what I wear as “too short,” but going out always involves about 10 minutes of mirror checking – if there’s even a tiny chance I feel like I’m giving the world a glimpse of my underwear I’ll change.
Also, I cannot understand how girls go out during winter in tiny dresses without a jacket. Now I can understand the reluctance for tights or pants, I know it gets hooooot as while dancing (a couple of dances and I’m a mess) but it isn’t that hard to hold a small jacket while you dance. And if dancing isn’t involved – wear pants! Pants can look gooood
I think it’s about working out what suits you and what makes you feel comfortable, not just wearing trends. Peplum doesnt suit me (waist is in the wrong spot for everything!) so I dont wear it. I dont feel comfortable showing random pieces of skin in cut out dresses so I dont wear them. There might not be that many choices out there, but it’s not that hard to find things that youre comfortable wearing and make you feel good.
Late night, non-sensical ramblings – there you go!
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I agree, legs or boobs, not both.
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I agree with you about exploring to find clothing you feel comfortable in, but as a woman who resolutely goes out clubbing without a jacket in winter, I just suck it up and deal. I spend way more time in the club or a taxi than I do on a cold street, plus I don’t want to have to awkwardly hold a jacket while I dance (especially if I’m dancing with someone!) or while I’m trying to manage a tray full of drinks. Like you, a couple of dances and I’m a mess, and for me, I dance basically like a maniac, so these days I don’t even take a purse with me when I go out either. Gotta cut down on the baggage!
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We judge Islam for dressing women in burqas, we don’t like old Chinese women sitting next to us on the train speaking Chinese, we feel wronged when we dress a certain way and people look at us. Society has gone mad.
I actually DON’T see why it is acceptable for someone to dress in such a way as I can see whether their knickers match their bra. It’s not my life, I can’t choose their clothes for them, but I wish they would coordinate with big overcoats.
I don’t think that a person being underdressed is a valid excuse for rape, but I do think underdressing leaves you open to unwanted attention, being gawked at, having lewd comments made at and about, wolf whistles, and for people to have the general impression that you are just ‘out for a good time’ Even if these things are not acceptable behaviour, even if these assumptions are untrue, I think they are to be expected, and anyone who truly, honestly would like to avoid such attention would surely be aware that other clothing options exist and are available to them.
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This is a good conversation to have. I’m not sure why anyone would actively wear shorts that give them a camel toe, or wear a skirt they have to keep pulling down to keep their butt cheeks in it – but they do, and its their prerogative. But knowing that we already have a few major social issues around self image, anorexia, bulimia in young women, I’m interested to know more about how the pressure to present in short, tight, sexy clothing impacts on these issues.
I get that not everyone who wears short, tight clothing feel the pressure, but i’m sure there’s a good percentage out there who don’t eat for a few days before a night out in a short skirt, just to make sure they fit into it.
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I admit that I roll my eyes at these girls,it looks horrible and tacky,yes.But it is their life and not mine. If they are having fun,so what ? I am not the one wearing it. I am 28 and long past the clubbing stage and only wear something that short to the beach or when I am at the gym.
I like to dress casual and elegant but if they want the “trashy” look then they should wear what they want.
And even if they dress like “sluts” they are not targets for rape.A woman should wear what she God damn pleases without being a target of a monster who can’t respect women.
Yes they look stupid and need a lesson with makeup and style,but as I said: not our life.
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I think there is an assumption here that women dress this way to find a boyfriend. Who’s to say they don’t just want some sex or a one-night stand? Who’s to say they’re not dressing that way because they want to look a bit extreme and enjoy showing off their bodies (with their friends) while they’re young? How many of these women are actually doing this to get a boyfriend and, more to the point, has anyone actually asked them?
My idea of dressing in less nowadays (I’m 24) is a lot more conservative than 5-6 years ago, but when it happens, it’s usually because I just feel like showing off a bit! Nothing more, nothing less. Just saying “I have this body and I’m proud of it”, particularly as I exercise a lot to have it! All that aside, have you ever tried going dancing in long sleeves? Or in pants? It gets HOT and SWEATY and UNCOMFORTABLE. Flats and sensible heels I can understand, but honestly when you’re REALLY dancing, you want to be getting some air on your skin!
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I have friends who dress completely different from day to night. During the day they will dress in mainly jeans and t-shirt however once the weekend hits they are finding a short tight dress to put on. I’m not sure what it is? I still go out a fair bit but I don’t feel that I change my appearance as much as they do just to hit the clubs. It may be because i’m taken and they are single but i’m sure i’d still dress the same way even if i was single. My friends who dress like this are single, blonde and skinny and I honestly think that they believe they will attract more attention by dressing this way. But I always tell them that it’s going to be the wrong kind of guys and the wrong kind of attention. But hey, each to their own! To me, I think they look more gorgeous naturally then in these dresses that don’t show the amazing fashion sense that they have.
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I was at a house party with a bunch of friends on Saturday night, most of us 24, some a little younger. Some were heading out afterwards, some of us had to work the next day so made it an early night. Common theme? We all wore flats, dresses were cute, and sure, a bit short, but not slutty. Make up was understated. God I’m glad we’re at that age where comfort trumps all.
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Maybe if the hookers started wearing knee-length skirts and sensible shoes we could tell them apart from the young girls.
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I’ve attended far too many Year 12 formals to date, but every year is a mixture of trash, class and niceness.
I’ve never asked the boys what they think, but I hear them talk in class the following week. Trust me, they have nothing good to day about bullshit shoes, too much make up or constant dress re-adjustment.
I figure that hearing nothing about the nicely dressed girls says a lot. They wouldn’t want to go out with someone who was being trash talked by a bunch of their mates, so they only talk about the chicks who don’t mean much to any of them.
I know what kinds of girls I want my boys to take to their formal…
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There is a fine line between sexy and slutty. It’s truly about how the girl wears the outfit, more than the outfit itself. Two girls can wear the exact same supposedly ‘slutty’ outfit, and one could pull it off sexily and elegantly (you can have both) with her styling, make-up and carriage, and the other could fall under the former category. A discerning observer should be able to tell difference, because it is about the girl’s attitude and self-belief, that will shine past all the skin-tight clothing or lack thereof.
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Wasn’t sure whether I should comment, but I will.
I judge every single person by the way they dress. The way someone presents themselves speaks volumes for their personality.
I’m 19 and I would NEVER go out dressed like a lot of girls my age. Of course people are going to judge you and infer that you are stupid and trying to get laid if you wear a skirt that shows your bum with your boobs hanging out. No one takes you seriously.
I care a great deal about the way I present myself to the world. Yes, I’ll dress sexy if I’m going out, but sexy doesn’t need to be tacky or vulgar.
And in all honesty, I have more value than just my sexuality. I have more to offer the world than just my body.
Each to their own I guess, but I hope people realise that you are judged on the way you dress.
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Oh Chelsea, can I introduce you to my son?
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Oh that’s so flattering Suki! I need to meet more guys that care more about personality than looks
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Oh that’s so flattering Suki! I need to meet more guys that care more about personality than looks
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I agree Chelsea! There are a lot of self righteous women that will insist they have the right to not be judged by what they wear… but I think we all have to get a grip on reality here. You’d be judged if you walked around in public in your underwear (as insane probably), and you’d be judged if you walked around in dirty clothes with holes (as a homeless person or junkie). You’d be judged also if you didn’t bother ironing your clothes as someone who didn’t care enough to make an effort.
And so too, if you dress in things that you usually see on a prostitute as someone who is superficial or has poor self worth.
Mean? Maybe… but this is life.
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superiority is such an ugly trait in people. Judging homeless people for not having clean pressed clothes is just sad.
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I like you’ve missed Lucinda’s and my point. We’re simply stating that people will be judged based on how they dress. Nothing about feeling superior.
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people will be judged on how they dress? what an awful point to try and make.
god help the homeless who can’t afford clothes on their backs, or families recovering from mortgage debt wearing clothing donated by charities.
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I think it’s ridiculously naive to think we don’t judge people based on their choice of clothing. Of course you can’t know for certain what someone is like based on their clothes, but first impressions say a lot, and I’m not ashamed to admit I will make a judgement based on presentation.
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I didn’t say I judged homeless people, you need to re-read my comment. I said people will judge someone whose clothes are in tatters AS BEING HOMELESS. As in human nature is such that we make judgements about what we can guess about a person from the way they present themselves. Everyone does it. That’s why first impressions are so important. It has nothing to do with superiority. I have more compassion than most, trust me.
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Not everyone does it I’m afraid, Lucinda, Thank god. I work with women and children who have fled domestic violence situations. They come to us with nothing but the clothes on their backs. I would hate to think of people judging them, for nothing more than their clothes not fitting right or being un-ironed. Have you heard of the saying “don’t judge a book by its cover”. I think it’s a good one to remember as you go through life.
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For goodness sakes Penny, I said I did NOT judge people personally based on what they wear. I said people CAN and WILL infer what they know about someone from their personal presentation because it is human nature. I was NOT having a crack at homeless people, I was pointing out that human nature is such that people make judgements about things they see. They do, even if subconciously. Let’s not all pretend to be saints here.
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It would be a wonderful world if people were more tolerant and less judgemental.
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Snog Marry Avoid comes to mind! But hell if your 18 and have a great body why not show it off and enjoy some attention because it wont last forever.
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I’ll be the first to admit that I find the idea of “fierce” dressing somewhat bewildering. I dislike spray tans, hair extensions, bright, towering heels and bright hot pants, but I guess if you just go out and have fun, well why not? Just because you’re dressed a certain way doesn’t automatically mean you’ll act like a trash bag. You see pictures of people looking very second hand after a big day at the races and they usually start out pretty dressed up early on.
I know we had a kind of uniform in the late 80s/early 90s which included miniskirts and towering heels and fluffy hair, but behaved ouselves (usually). I’d be disappointed if we were judged similarly because no one was ever hurt.
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I feel like a nana when I say the same things about how 20 somethings dress, but I was recently in the nightclub area of my city watching two very scantily dressed girls walking down the street in front of me teetering on porn star shoes. I nudged my friend and we shrugged our shoulders about the “younger generation”. Next thing we know one of the girls goes belly up on her teetering heels and exposed the unfortunate fact that she wasn’t wearing undies under her micro mini.
Of course my friend and I shook our heads. Expecting leering from the young 20 something guys around us, I was very surprised to see the same reaction of disgust from them, and comments about what she was wearing as being a ridiculous.
Maybe I’m not such a nana after all?
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When did you women become so judgemental?, is it because you cannot wear these outfits anymore? Short memories, ladies?, what did you wear or not wear when you were in your late teens, early twenties. Its like a uniform to them, short shorts, etc.
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As a 26 year old whose memory is pretty good, I can guarantee that I did not wear anything like that as a teen or in my early 20′s. And I’ve got the photos and comments from people around me to prove it.
Also, it’s a bit rich to rag on about others being judgmental when you’ve basically implied that those of us who find it disgusting are just jealous because we don’t look like that. You have absolutely nothing to back that up.
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I may cause an uproar, but personally I think that while everyone has the right to wear whatever they like, and I respect that, I also think girls and women need to think carefully about a) what flatters their body shape and b) what kind of impression they are giving when they wear something that looks like swimwear or has their arses hanging out the bottom. Men don’t walk around wearing next to nothing and if they did walk around in a night club in hotpants women would stare and grab and assume they were a stripper. If you want to wear something that makes you look like Malibu stripper Barbie and bare your arse and boobs to everyone in a 10km radius, no problem. But just don’t be surprised if men stare and attempt to grab or if people don’t take you seriously.
That is my opinion… and even if people don’t say it, I guarantee I am not alone.
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As poor Coco Chanel met with her maker some time ago, I would seriously doubt that she is currently wishing any appendage of hers to be shut. For any reason.
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I wore the uniform as well in my late teens/early 20s. Not this one and it’d change a bit depending on season and year but it was definitely a uniform of the time and where I lived. Same as how we see so many high school pics of girls from the 80s and 90s look quite similar – to the point where if someone mentions a trend from back then many of us say “hell yeah, remember that?” and laugh as we tell our own stories – these women today are making their own entries into the Fashion Hall of Fame/Shame that they may some day look back on and cringe and laugh at as well.
So yeah I’m not going to judge. It seems like WAY too much time, maintenance and cash for a younger version of me to ever have been able to keep up with the extensions, nails, spray tans, etc but can’t be a hypocrite and say they look any more ridiculous than those of us did ‘back in the day’. I’m more concerned if young women today are being extremely careful when they go out and are looking out for each other regardless of what they’re wearing. Surely that’s more important.
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I am curious about the posts authored by the ‘Mamamia Team’ rather than an individual writer. How can a whole team jointly write a post? Or is it a way of protecting an individual from personal backlash when commenting on controversial topics?
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Hey Elle,
There’s not too much too it really. Often several team members have contributed to the post or helped put it together
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I think the question is, is dressing the way they do, getting them what they, personally, privately, really want? To the degree they want it?
If yes, knock yourself out. If not, then I’d suggest a different approach to achieve that.
Personally I am not for it.
But I hear my mother make comments about women not showing cleavage after they’re 40. And as a child, I remember hearing the ‘knitting circle’ make comments about how a woman’s hair should become short once she reached 30.
I’ve hit the 40 mark and show cleavage and have long hair, like most of my peers do. And I come from the time that says (as does Victoria Beckham), show one or the other – ‘cleavage or legs’ not both. Which is not being adhered to with girls today.
So every generation brings about change that is unappealing to the one preceding it.
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I have a stunning teenage daughter with a body to pull this off but i would hate her too (the shorts, the skirts ok). This outfit doesn’t say “confidence” or “fierce” to me.. Instead it screams insecurity and a need for attention and affirmation. I’m trying to teach her that she has more to offer than the length of her legs. ps I think it’s really interesting the girls all have the same shoes..
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I cannot take anyone who dresses like this seriously. Why would anyone want to look like this on PURPOSE? Yes I admit to tending to automatically assign to that stereotype a lower IQ, who usually dumb themselves down at school and work and usually have a lack of self worth, self importance and opinion. They’ve grown up watching women in videos doing the sexy dancing dressing in barely nothing singing about love and guys and etc etc and having zero positive female role models. They’ve watched silly giggly women in commercials almost have an orgasm over anything on sale or a cleaning product, clean toilet etc etc. They usually spend their lives looking forward to meeting the man of their dreams just like in the movies and planning their marriage and rest of their dream lives married and being a domestic goddess to their man for happy ever after as the fairy tales have promised. Then they’ll be dressing their little princesses in all the pink stuff with Hot! written on their toddler bras and undies. The cycle continues. Yes I know…but fed up with teaching too many girls in high school who have zero opinions, absence of any original thoughts and define themselves through looking sexy and getting /having a boyfriend.
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You know what? I dress like that a lot, I love the short skirts and sexy dancing and pink. And I am in a stable, long-term relationship (with a woman, so I’m not ‘dressing for men’) I don’t want a big princess wedding and I’m currently completing my PhD. So there’s that.
I am sick of this attitude that it is fine to degrade women if they dress and look a specific way, you have no idea what they’re like because you’re all too damn busy feeling superior. Jesus. ENOUGH ALREADY.
(And yes, I am adhering to dinner party rules; I’d say a lot worse at an actual dinner party, to be honest).
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They can dress like that as much as they like, as long as it is an appropriate occasion and they don’t complain about not getting the nice guys… you’ll only ever get what you put yourself out for…
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I don’t judge these young girls for the way they dress, good luck to them, but if they’re after a bloke, and by that I mean a DECENT bloke who will treat them as an equal and with respect, then I think they’re going the wrong way about it. When I was young hitting the clubs I dressed in very skimpy clothes. Did I meet any blokes? Sure, heaps! But were any of them keepers? HELL NO! Once I calmed down, stopped clubbing and started a more ‘wholesome’ approach to my look, that’s when I started meeting nice guys!
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What I notice when I am out and about on a night on the town, is not so much how little fabric there is covering them (except they must be freezing in the middle of a melbourne winter) but that the outfits people are wearing are so all the same, its like a uniform… I get that they want to fit in, to be attractive, and my own personal thoughts on whether they achieve that are really here nor there, but I do think its great to express your individuality in what you wear, to find your own style. 15 yrs ago, there seemed to be a much great diversity in personal style… something that seems to be not so accepted today!
Lastly, I cannot believe that clothes make anyone more or less of a target for assault… to say that they do is selling people short in the way of brain power and personal control… are they really that weak… I certainly hope not!! People who assault others, do it for their own sad reasons, nothing to do with what ever their victim is wearing.
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I agree with everything you have written here about the ‘uniform’ look etc. But about clothes making you a target – and I’m probably going to get shot down in flames here – if a scumbag of a guy is looking to assault someone, I figure they might just focus on the weakest member of the ‘pack’, so to speak, to use a nature analogy. So if a young lady is scantily dressed to begin with, gets drunk & messy, starts falling over, lady parts becoming visible, and she’s wearing super high heels that she can barely walk in sober, let alone drunk, it’s *conceivable* that she might become a target for attack – over others. As I’ve already commented below, I don’t have any particularly negative judgement about the clothes (the shoes – well, I have a different opinion about them!) – but combine them with binge drinking and loss of physical control… I don’t know.
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I think it comes down to either looking trashy or elegant.
Personally, I think girls that dress with super short skirts, fake tan, too much makeup, the same old bleached blonde hair etc look trashy. My guy friends think the same way and think they are dressing that way because they have low self esteems and want people to look at them. They also tend to think that those girls are just out to get laid.
On the other hand when I see a girl that is dressed really well and elegantly I think, wow! she’s beautiful. I tend to see the same reaction from my guy friends.
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Dont forget the ridiculously high shoes! Nothing elegant about them either
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What?! I like fierce. Fierce is who I am.
Jeeezzz, stop telling me what to do! I’ll figure it out for myself, because that’s what being young is about!
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“Fierce” is what you will look back on with embarassment in 10 years time. We’ve all been there. I was told. I wish I had listened. You have no idea how much I wish I had listened.
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So what if she’s embarrassed in 10 years time? That’s not a way to live, worrying about being embarrassed in a decade.
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Oh, honey…
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I think its interesting how so many women are SO interestedin what other women wear or how they behave. Whether or not it is proper or flattering according to their standards. Women can wear whatever they want & I am not going to align them with pornstars, playboy or make judgemental comments about their fakeness.
Maybe they like being fierce and sexy! Maybe it makes them feel confident. And as for men they’re diverse and attracted to all different looks/styles.
Attacking and judging women does nothing positive. It just encourages the control of women to dress and behave how others think is ‘right’ or ‘proper’ and shaming them when they do not adhere to it.
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Just as long as the look doesn’t end up in the office, or at least MY office (it will, you know it will), I say ‘whatever, have fun, stay safe’
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I am a nana, I think more power to them!
I thought we progressed beyond judging others on personal appearance & making wide sweeping assumptions purely based on clothing?
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I mentioned in another post that when I decided to go out one Sat night dancing with the girls and wear comfortable clothes (red jeans and pumps), people assumed I was a lesbian as I stood out from all the other girls. Interesting social experiment to try.
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I’m on the fence with this issue. Part of me thinks “if you’ve got the body confidence, enjoy it” (ie wear what you want), and part of me thinks it’s just trashy. But I guess there’s a line somewhere.
The skirt in the picture above, for example, I find alright. The super short shorts of the other two girls? Well they sit a little higher that what I’d deem publicly appropriate unless your at the pool or beach.
I guess I respect the confidence needed to wear these clothes, but question the common sense/safety of the girls wearing it out.
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Wear whatever you want and own it, accept responsibility for whatever it may cause.
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Clothing doesn’t cause anything. People make decisions about their behaviour, and their choices are not controlled by the sartorial decisions of others.
While I might not like the look of bummies as evening wear myself, I don’t see many consequences that the wearers should need to “accept responsibility” for except for probably feeling a bit cold on a chilly evening.
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and maybe falling over whilst wearing the aforementioned high heels.
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“accept responsibility for whatever it may cause”????? So what you’re saying is, if you get assaulted while wearing clothes that don’t cover you from neck to knee, it’s your fault!! It’s a sad day when we blame the victim, missy.
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Don’t think she meant it along those lines no one believes woman deserve to be raped etc, I think she meant it along the lines of lack of respect from others, falling over in those heels, maybe ending up with the wrong guy. That’s how I read it, i didn’t even think she was suggesting that when I read it. Sometimes words don’t really portray our meanings very well but it’s very harsh to think a person would believe rape was deserved
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For a while when I lived in Airlie (aka party town) I went out…a lot. And what I found was the nights I received the most attention, and the girls who got the most attention, were the ones dressed in jeans, not the ones dressed to impress (or otherwise). I don’t mind a short skirt or tight dress if it looks good, but usually it doesn’t.
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Interesting trick…a woman telling other women what she doesn’t like by pretending to be giving men’s thoughts. Is that because she thinks women will listen if they think men don’t like this fashion trend?
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So what if young girls want to wear short skirts, tight clothes, get their boobs done, get spray tans, dance all night. Big deal. And it does make you sound old fashioned, judgemental , a little jealous, and a whole lot jaded.
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I have to disagree. I’m 34 and my body looks a lot better than a lot of the girls who wear the too short/tight dresses and shouldn’t be wearing them. What most people are saying is that it looks trashy and not elegant or sophisticated. Sorry, but a lot of them look like hookers. You can still go out, party the night away and look hot without looking like a tramp.
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I have to disagree. A lot of short tight dresses look cute and fun, not trashy. You just have to be young to wear them. I’ll save the “elegant and sophisticated” look for when I get old or in my 30′s. Most young people don’t care what old people think of them or their clothing choices anyway.
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I’m 34 so I guess I am old as well. I have a 15 year old daughter and the one thing I tell her to do is really explore her sense of fashion and creativity while she is young. There ARE things that you can only pull off when you are young, that look ridiculous on older women. Not short and tight dresses though – short and tight dresses look pretty desperate no matter what the age. Sorry.
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Only old people say short dresses make a girl look desperate. I think old people sometimes forget when they were young and carefree. Sorry.
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Keep telling yourself that… I’m sure Angie from big brother does..
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LOL! I don’t watch big brother!
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Dear pickled, I do wear short dresses but they aren’t hooker dresses. Also at 34 years of age i have the body for them where as a lot of these girls don’t. Sorry but cheap Lycra is not flattering on these girls.
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Dear Mel, good for you for rocking short dresses at your age. But with so many judgemental people out there, I hope you don’t get judged as being mutton dressed like a lamb. BTW, I don’t judge anyone. To each their own I say. But If you judge others, be prepared to be judged yourself.
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Hardly mutton at 34 years.
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What are ‘hooker’ dresses?! I can’t believe how judgemental you sound! Maybe people look at you walking down the street and think how unflattering your dress is or how inappropriate it is for a 34 to dress that way. Leave the girls alone!
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