As I write this, I’m laying in my mum’s oversized bed, with my Labrador sitting by my feet and the television on for a little background noise.
This is not the way I had envisioned spending a Thursday afternoon. Normally, I would be chained to my desk in the city, buzzing to finish my stories for that afternoon’s deadline. I would be making phone calls, writing emails and arguing with the sub-editors over grammar.
But not today. Today I woke up about 10.30am, had a nap a few hours later, and whenever I needed to use the bathroom, I would need to physically lean on my mum to help make the short distance.
A lot is made of how ‘busy, busy, busy’ we all are, but I never really thought about my own level of action before I woke up with a fever two weeks ago, and have been stuck in bed ever since.
I have Glandular Fever. I know it’s not a medical tragedy and that I’m fortunate it’s nothing worse. But when my doctor called to give me the results of my blood test, I burst into tears.
This simply wasn’t good timing; I don’t have time to be sick! I’ve got stuff to do! And at the risk of sounding like a competitive wowser, I’m really just too busy for this.
When I mentioned this to my mum, who has extraordinarily nursed me ever since I became sick, she looked at me like I had announced I was converting to Scientology and that, yes, Tom Cruse isn’t at all insane.
“You’re joking, right? You’re too busy to me sick? Oh Lani, I’ve never heard anything so stupid.”
My first instinct was to defend myself and my little outburst, but I’ve got to admit she has a point. I’m sick, but I’m getting the best care, and with any luck, I’ll be back on my feet in a couple of weeks. But it’s so strange to be immobilized like this, to be so swiftly taken down – it’s like I’d forgotten I’m human, in a rush to be and do everything.
Four weeks out of action – away from work, friends and society – seems like a life sentence. I can’t help but think what I’ll miss out on. I’ve always been afraid that if I ever stop, I’ll somehow forever be trying to catch up again.
But being forced to stop – not slow down, but stop, completely – has me questioning how fast things are done now. Food is so fast an anti-movement, slow food, was created. Movies and television shows are downloaded in minutes and reviewed on Facebook within hours. News stories are broken instantanlessly via Twitter, leaving less and less time to gather information, and instead fed the hungry beast that is the public and also the competition. It’s so fast it makes me dizzy just thinking about it [and that’s not just because extreme dizziness is one of my symptoms].
Every time I’ve been sick in the past, I’ve arrogantly decided I didn’t want to be sick and I would rush back to work too soon, hang out with friends earlier than I should have. My health, I thought, could fit in with my life, and on my terms. Glandular Fever has been, as they say, my poetic justice. It’s forced me to realise there’s something even more powerful than a calendar filled up with social engagements and deadlines.
In the meantime, while I wait for the night sweats to go away and the overwhelming fatigue to fade, I’ve decided to not try and rush anything. I’m going to stay in bed and rest, drink as much water as possible and not exert myself by even watching too much television or read too much. It’s not something that comes natural, but I’m going to give it a go. As my mum would say, “there’s nothing more important than your health”. And at the risk of giving her a big head, I’m afraid she’s right. Again.
Alana Schetzer is a Melbourne-based journalist and writer. She doesn’t like being sick. She tweets here.
Have you ever been forced to stop?
Comments
71 Comments so far
Such a timely article. I had glandular fever when I was 13 but didn’t realise and worked through it. I ended up being diagnosed with M. E. a year later and have struggled with energy issues since.
14 years on I’m now 32 weeks pregnant and this week, my body has forced me to slow down – the exhaustion I feel this week is as debilitating as how you describe in your article. I’ve felt like I’m “failing” for not keeping up with everything (work, socialising, housework), but your article has given me some perspective. Thank you
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I had glandular fever in year 11, when I was 17. I took a month off school and when I recovered I went back to my hectic life. Two years later, I got another fever, and bam. Chronic fatigue. You think taking one month off life is bad, try taking a year off everything except sleeping and eating. Even now, three years after my diagnosis, I can hardly do anything. If I exercise (which can be walking around the shops) for half an hour, I will need a four hour nap to recover. Your doctor may have told you that in a month you will be back to normal but that’s not always the case. I rushed myself back and my body never really recovered, which is why I now have chronic fatigue. My best friend in year 11 also got glandular fever when I did, took six months off school and ended up repeating year 11. She now is completing her uni degree and has a normal, active life while I get tired walking to the shower. Never put anything, not your career, friends or family as best you can, before your health when it comes to fatigue because once your body gives up, as mine has, it can be for ten or more years and you are no good to anyone then. Best of luck.
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at the risk of giving her a big head, I’m afraid she’s right. Again.
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at the risk of giving her a big head, I’m afraid she’s right. Again.
http://www.heathrowluxuryhomesforsale.com/
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I got glandular fever about 11 years ago just before I had children, I was like you, running around working, socialising, not eating properly and one day I just woke and couldn’t get out of bed, scared the hell out of me, once I got the diagnosis I saw a Natropath who helped so much, but it took me a good year to feel on top of things and since then I now know my limits and always get a good nights sleep, good luck, you will be up and about before you know it xxxxx
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I am 34 and since I was 29 I have been attached 3 weekly to a dialysis machine awaiting a kidney transplant. I am a mum of two beautiful, vibrant, emphatic and intelligent young kids who have never known a ‘well’ mum. My illness has given me so much, much more than it has taken. I enjoy feeling the sun on my face, cuddling my children and the strength and comfort I feel in my husbands arms. It is not that this didn’t happen before it is just that the effect is x100 when you don’t feel invincible. I wish I could get a transplant and be well, travel and run around with my kids, but until then, those that can, please treasure it on my behalf!
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I had glandular fever a few years ago. The doctor at the emergency ward said it was the worst case he’s ever seen. My throat closed twice and i was hospitalized for close to a week. Even months later the smallest things from just walking to the kitchen or taking a shower would cause me to sleep for hours.
My mum was my rock, she helped me eat, drink and yes, she even bathed me.
All i can say is you need to get some ‘sustagen’ into you. Its found at the chemist and its about $25 for a massive tub. Start drinking it with milk and it’ll help build back your immune system.
But above all else, rest. Enjoy your dogs company!
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Glandular fever is horrible. I had it at uni, not too bad, just the chronic fatigue (luckily I didn’t kill myself the number of times I nearly fell asleep driving home from uni) but then had it again about two years ago and it was hideous. For me the second time the worst symptom was crippling muscle pain, so bad I didn’t want anyone to touch me because it hurt so much. That and the tiredness led to some serious emotional turbulence. However I stupidly pushed through it only to have a second crash. I’ve never seen my parents look so scared as when on Christmas morning I burst into tears at the breakfast table and curled on the floor because moving anywhere hurt and even getting to the couch was just too far.
GF doesn’t leave you, it can lie dormant and come back at any time (sorry to be a downer). I think it is your body’s way of slowing you down. Now when I’m pushing like crazy, I have that little voice in the back of my head say “don’t forget GF, it could come back, slow down now”.
My only advice, take things slow and when you do go back to work a vitamin B tablet at lunch is brilliant to keep you going through the afternoon. Oh and remember it really attacks your liver so cut out all alcohol and fatty foods that are hard work on your liver.
Consider this time to catch up with some movies/books etc! Oh and give people this: http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory-written-by-christine-miserandino/ to read so they understand how you feel.
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I LOVE THE SPOON THEORY!
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I just had to reiterate the warning that many others have mentioned below – be very cautious about throwing yourself back into life once you are feeling better! I had glandular fever at the end of my first year of uni, and a few weeks after I had recovered I got a bit overtired at my (very low-key) birthday party – and I had a relapse.
Best wishes for your recovery!
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I am living your worst nightmare! Just like you I thrived on doing a million things at once & I was damn good at it! I got married a year after meeting my dream man & 4mths later POW… Fibromyalgia. Think about all your symptoms plus 12 out of 10 graded pain 24/7. That was 10 yrs ago. I still am only a shadow of my old formidable working woman, but I find ways to feel forfilled, under my new terms, I have to do everything differently. But, unlike your lucky self, mine is an uncertain future, with no cure or even treatment.
My advice, use this time and imagine if you didn’t get better, right a list of the most important things to you. Keep it. It may one day play an important role in healing yourself again.
My best wishes on a speadie recovery, then enjoy what you have!
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Sarah, my story is very similar to yours. Diagnosed with Fibro 12 years ago. Managed to slowly finish my law degree and even practice for a while. Had 2 beautiful children (but had to be in a wheelchair or crutches to get around during pregnancy! Nasty!). Now each day is spent trying to do the best I can for my kids, my husband and myself depending on how much pain I am in. Sleep is elusive. An inordinate amount of money is spent on pain killers, physical therapy (& wine when necessary!!). Not sure I’ll ever actually be able to work again. I tried to start a Masters last year but my body had other ideas. Not many people know too much about Fibro do they? But you learn to adjust your goals and expectations of yourself and put on a happy face, hey? Best of luck. x
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I have refelex sympathetic dystrophy or Chronic regional pain syndrome.
I can completely relate to your suffering and my specialist says Fibro is what i want to have instead of rsd.
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Glandular fever is so evil. It took 2 years of my late teens and university became impossible. I hope you feel better soon!
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being told I have an 11cm malignant tumor in my spinal cord with the removal causing paralysis of my leg – that’s a stop to things. Six months of physical rehab followed. Thankfully, the paralysis was temporary and the 30% chance of permanent paralysis didn’t eventuate :- ) 8months on, my mobility is back to 90-95% of what it was, a fantastic result, but still a life changing one. My scans continue to make sure the tumour hasn’t and doesn’t return
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May your scans continue to be clear.
Surgery (x 2) for a benign brain tumour brought me to a grinding halt, although the second time was more of a pause. I got to watch seasons change and others doing my “jobs”, while I rested and did rehab as well.
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I ran myself into the ground a few years ago, and ended up with Glandular Fever and tonsilitis all in one. I could barely stay awake for 5 minutes, and I had trouble getting water down my throat, let alone actual food.
My mum took me to a chinese medicine man, who loaded me up with a bag of what appeared to be leaves, twigs and dried beetles. He told me to boil it twice with water, then strain, and drink it at least twice a day. I am as skeptical as much as the next person about alternative medicines, but within two weeks of being diagnosed, I was better – eating properly, able to stay awake all day etc. I recommend anyone give it a try – you’ve got nothing to lose, and it certainly worked for me.
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And that is what we call ‘confirmation bias’. Look it up.
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Or anecdotal evidence. Either way, it doesn’t affect your life and if it helped her, who cares?
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I had glandular fever when I was at uni, right in the middle of my exams.
It took a good 6 months before the fatigue went away and I started feeling better, so you do really need to look after yourself and take it easy. I don’t think I got out of bed at all for the first 4 weeks.
Your mum is right.
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When I was 18 I was diagnosed with a chronic auto-immune disease. When I’m in remission I feel healthy and can live life like a ‘normal’ person, but when I have a flare, it can take months to really get better. Learning to say no, recognising your limits, that is one of the hardest lessons. Realising that sometimes you just miss out. That your body has physical limitations that other people your age don’t have deal with. It sucks! I can’t tell you how much stick I’ve received from friends for being ‘lazy’ because I only do 3 subjects at uni. I don’t care. It’s my body. It’s precious. When did it become such a rewardable trait to trash our bodies by “soldiering on” when we get sick?
GOOD ON YOU for coming to this realisation and deciding to rest in bed until you feel better. Sometimes the healing process is a marathon and not a sprint. If there’s ever a time to put your own needs above your employer and your friends this is it! Hope you’re feeling better in the near future x
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I agree with what many others have said below – just be aware of not pushing yourself too hard, even when you think you are better, when the immediate symptoms have cleared up, and you want to belt head long back into it.
I learned my lesson the hard way last year. After several sinus infections, a very bad chest infection and a virus – all of which I ‘pushed through’ – I ended up with post viral fatigue with is like being hit by a Mack truck every single day. I count myself lucky in that mine only lasted six months, as others have said below, it can last years. I didn’t even have the energy to lay on the couch, if that makes sense. It was an effort just to be.
I now realise that rest is just as important as exercise. That early nights and plenty of sleep are a must. That good nutrition and taking care of yourself like you would a loved one (funny how we never do that?) is vital.
Good luck getting over GF. And please make sure you ease yourself back into it!
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This story is me to a t! I’ve had glandular fever for the last month – so severe that i won’t be able to have any booze for a year. It has been one of the worst experiences of my life! To feel so pathetic all the time and not actually have any cure for the illness is the worst part.
But, in saying that, I’ve lost weight and after a month of virtually no social interaction – have valued the smallest things, like having a tea with a girlfriend or getting a sweet text from my boyfriend. So, it’s not all bad!
Hope you get better fellow glandular survivor!
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Almost 10yrs ago, i was crazy busy. I was a young manager, working my way up in a telco, i was acting in amateur plays and rode my motorbike for fun in between. Next thing I knew, I was in hospital being lined up for brain surgery, I’d had a strange seizure that was caused by the pressure a brain tumour was putting on my brain. That was a big 4 month stop, fortunately my work took good care of me and life kept going, we didn’t lose the house, the theatre company found a new secretary, my motorcycle friends came to visit and tell me about their rides.
When I started work again, I tried to stay in the same role and played the game for a while before i admitted that my brain just didn’t work the same way anymore and I just couldn’t do it. I couldn’t act anymore, my facial muscles were damaged by the surgery, so I just didn’t have the same command over my expressions. I took a long time to get back on the bike and never had the same confidence. I still look back and see the person I used to be, and miss her.
My then fiance and I got married, we have two beautiful children who I stay home to raise, I love being with them, but miss the stamina and wit I used to have. Illness, and particularly life changing illness, is a hard thing to live through, but better than the alternative!
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I had glandular fever half way through my first year of Uni. My mum took her long service leave from work and looked after me. I slept and drank her homemade smoothies for 6 weeks. I lost a lot of weight and when I finally returned to Uni I felt incredible. I had lots of energy and most importantly it gave me the time to appreciate the course I was doing wasnt what I really wanted to do. So I finished the year and transferred to something more enjoyable. I’m grateful that I had a mum who looked after me and a family who supported me until I got better. Stopping is the only way you can recover and feel well again. And for me made me realise I didnt want to spend my time doing something I didnt like.
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Can definately relate I was struck down with pneumonia last I was very ill with an annoying cough that was at first misdiagnosed and unrelenting fevers it took me 8 weeks to recover, but unfortunately I passed it on to my husband and baby who was hospitalised.
Needless to say I had the flu vaccine this year … hopefully the kids won’t bring home too many diseases either. The wake up call has been well and truly headed if I feel unwell I take it easy for a day or so to recoup.
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I really enjoyed reading this piece as I was struck down with dibilitating post viral fatigue 2 years ago and I too was far too busy to be sick. Life is very different these days. I regularly miss out on things like social events and can no longer work. We will both appreciate our health when we are well again. Good luck and get well soon
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wishing you good health soon.
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Our society expects us to “soldier on” at work no matter what and we feel under pressure to do this. Even the ads tell us to. The bottom line is that we have to listen to what our bodies are saying. When you are a mother, we usually do have to keep going but most of us who work can be replaced temporarily.
It’s easy to feel guilty about having time off but that is what sick leave is for. If you have something that is contagious, you are not a hero going to work, you are a menace! When it is all said and done, who is even going to remember how you pushed yourself let alone thank you.
I found that if I started getting migraines, that it was a sign that I needed to rest..my body was telling me something. It took me a while to work it out but eventually I did and it paid off in the end. Rest for a day, change what you can and then get back into it. And don’t feel guilty, the stress of guilt undermines your good intentions.
As far as GF goes, so many people end up with post viral syndrome or chronic fatigue and that is way worse than than a few weeks off. As a previous commentor noted, things like cancer can gain a foothold in a compromised immune system. Work won’t seem quite so important then.
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Giggles – you got the better of the sub-Editors this time
But really, sorry to hear of your illness and I wish you a speedy recovery.
I hope readers might be interested in this snippet: my Psychiatrist practices what he preaches by taking a week or two off every 12 weeks. Obviously, this amount of time is not an option for everyone, but he demonstrates by example his belief in self-care as a significant part of physical and emotional health. Self-care and nurturing should also be viewed as being respectful and caring towards those who depend on you, personally and professionally – not some kind of indulgence to feel guilty about. Be kind to yourself
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Please be REALLY CAREFUL about pushing yourself too early. As others have said, glandular fever can lead to other long-term illnesses. At 20 years of age my super healthy, athletic partner got glandular fever and he pushed himself to work through most of it. He got chronic fatigue and still has it six years later.
Take heaps of care of yourself, take in lots of nutrients and don’t go back to normal life early no matter how boring it is! Please!
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I am in two minds about this article and the comments it has attracted – as I always am when I read something similar.
I love it when people can communicate the isolating experience that is illness, especially “invisible” illnesses.
But I always worry about the implication that a busy life is responsible for these illnesses. I have a chronic illness which is finally managed, but spent over 4 years seriously ill. I can’t count the number of people who were convinced it was because of my “Type A” personality, the busy lifestyle I led etc etc. My illness was nothing more than bad luck – and as it turns out probably bad genes. I could have been a lazy slob and got sick. I could have lived an even more hectic life and got sick. Sometimes people just get sick. Sure, my life is less busy now than it was before my illness, but this is clearly a response to physical limitations my illness imposes, not any life-changing epiphany about how my life caused my illness.
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In 2010, life was great, busy and going Places with work, and was pregnant. 12 wk scan came around – no heart beat! I hadn’t factored that into my bust schedule. Had that day off work, went to work the next day ducking in and out for doctors and scans. Was in my uniform when I went to the doctors, and she asked ‘why?’ I said I have to, no other choice. She said I needed d&c that afternoon and to take the week off, again I said I couldn’t (as much as I wanted to, I felt I couldn’t). Went back to work after docs til 1pm, then went straight to hospital for d&c, back to work 2 days later.
It took it’s toll on me, not resting, grieving and putting myself first. I stayed a work only for another week and then quit. I hated what I did, I feel guilty that I was putting work way before me, my family and health.
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This happened to me last year. Not glandular fever, but six months of severe fatigue and debilitating headaches until I was able to find two doctors who took an interest instead of just saying ‘nothing is coming up on your blood tests’, and now with a mix of treatment has started to help.
There’s a comment below about people thinking you ‘can’t hack real life’ and that to be recognised as doing something, anything, you have to be doing a million things. I totally agree with that and I was exactly the same, only 12 months ago saying to a friend ‘maybe I need to be more like [person A] as she gets involved in everything and has networks all over the place and look at where that’s got her’, and I felt like I needed to be like that just to be recognised.
But after being exhausted and sick and feeling guilty for not being at work, I have finally come to a place where I recognise what my limitations are. On those mornings I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck, I no longer push myself to go to work, because I’m really no use to anyone. Now comes the mental and emotional toll however, of feeling like I’m mentally ‘spent’, and I’m still working through how I really feel about that.
Take the time to rest and get better. I can just add to the stories below that if you try to push yourself, at some point your body is going to go ‘enough’. Hope you’re feeling better soon, Alana.
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Please look after your self during this, I had GF a couple of years ago pretty much work through the majority of it instead of working, I know have lymphoma. All the doctors say my body never properly recovered from the GF and that opened the gate for the cancer. I’m only 21
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If you don’t have your health you have nothing.
True words and as a result of liver disease in my 20′s and about two decades of carb and sugar addiction my health is now suffering. Food should be your medicine so I’ve just switched to a paleo diet and I’m already feeling a lot better. Just cut out processed crap, wheat and sugar, the results will astound you.
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I know it sounds trite but I really do believe that we don’t realise how important our health is till we lose it. When you’re chronically ill trying to manage even some of the most basic of tasks can be exhausting. And chronic illness is so isolating too. And expensive. And if your finances are in the hands of centrelink god help you with the plethora of forms, repetitive paperwork and waiting in that interminable queue for the mandatory appointments. It’s been a while since I was there but I still shudder at the memories!
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Glandular Fever had me off work, at a pivotal place in my career, for 3 months in my early 20s. It gave me temporary Viral Arthritis: painful swollen finger joints, an enlarged Spleen etc. I was bored stiff – but I got better, eventually resigned from my profession and travelled overseas for 2 years…
Now – many, many years on I have two Chronic Health conditions, one of which may have been caused by the Epstein Barr Virus. So Lani… please follow up this G.F with a Naturopath or someone who will look at your big health picture. And listen to your mother – or she may take your laptop away!
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I’m sorry to hear about your illness but I must wag my finger at you and say ‘what on earth are you doing writing an article for Mamamia when you’re supposed to be resting?’ I hope your Mum catches you and removes your computer so that you can keep on resting…lol
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Well the sad thing about this is that the writer DOES NOT EVEN KNOW OR HAVE ANY PERCEPTION WHATSOTVER OF LIFE WITHOUR A COMPUTER, LAPTOP, iPAD OR iPHONE. There was A LIFE ONCE REALLY!! Now that would be a great Reality Shpw!! You saw it here FIRST!
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shOw**
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19, uni student, partying hard- got pnumonia. This caused my mild to moderate asthma to become severe uncontrollable life threatening asthma and I spent the next 3 years in and out of hospital- going in for a month at a time. Designated Zero life expectancy and Zero quality of life. On a Disability Pension. My parents were given “The Talk” and told to arrange my funeral. At one point they sent me home so I could die in familiar surroundings.
I finished my degree while in hospital after a specialist told me not to bother as I wouldn’t live long enough to finish it.
I worked very hard to improve an managed to get back to full time work- worked my way up to being Commercial Administrator of a mine. Woke one day in lots of pain. Week later go to hospital as it feels like I have gallstones but I had had my gallbladder removed 5 years earlier. Have surgery- they don’t know what it is. I go back to work, still in pain. 3 months later my pain is severe and 24/7 and I can no longer work. Back on Disability. 5 years of tests and 16 specialists later they finally find the tumour. 5 years of me sleeping 16 hours a day, having to be in bed because standing up makes the pain so much worse. Having to be on opiates and many other medications.
Takes me almost a year to be able to wean off all the medication.
I am now pregnant and (oh god this sounds like it’s turning into a country song) my asthma is reacting badly to the pregnancy hormones so walking up my front steps leads me to an asthma attack.
Your health is EVERYTHING.
If I had health- I could make money
If I had health- I could work out and make that body I want
If I had health- I could nurture my friendships
So what ever you do take the time that is needed. With my pnumonia I didn’t slow down, so I caught it again- and it lingered for months, and maybe if I had paid attention to my body I never would have been in the asthmatic mess I am
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Oh dear. I was hospitalised with pneumonia last year (intensive care life support for a week), and hated the whole hospital experience so much I decided to just get straight back into life, even though I was told to slow down. Ten months later I still don’t feel fantastic and am starting to feel burnt out in my career which I have always loved… your story is an excellent wake up call for me to slow down and preserve my health. Thanks for sharing
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Really sounds like you’re struggling… part of me wants to know WHY you would put your body through the stress of pregnancy and then add to your life’s pressures with the financial, emotional and mental strain of a child…. I guess you shouldn’t “put off” life because of an illness but at the same time I can’t see how that was the best move. I do hope you recover soon.
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In October last year I was hospitalised with a rampaging blood infection, complications of cellulitis, I spent 4 days in icu, they called my family in for the “talk” and it was touch and go. I then spent 3 months in a hospital bed, unable to move much. I am still in hospital, undergoing rehab, learning to walk again. I have just mastered the art of going to the loo by myself. I might be out of here in another 3 weeks.
My life stopped when I got sick, I had to defer my university course, I am now on a disability pension, I will be going home with a walker and I’ll need home help.
I still have trouble processing what has happened to me, and there have been lots of tears and depression and anger.
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Love to you, boodie. x
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Thank you, its been a long journey for me, and I will never take my health for granted again.
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I was healthy, well, studying at uni, raising my sons….all just fine and dandy!
I went to hospital for day surgery, no big deal, I took my uni textbooks with me and expected to be out in a few hours. The surgery went horribly wrong, I almost died and ended up in intensive care for five days and had three blood transfusions. It took months to recover. I was supposed to be doing my first round of prac teaching and I missed the whole thing.
I couldnt walk more than a few steps for weeks. It took forever to heal and the scar is still numb. I couldn’t believe how much I took my health for granted.
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Sucks the first time you find out you are not bullet proof.
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In 2005 my life came to a massive halt. I was a really sporty mid-highschool teenager until February 2005 when I was (finally) diagnosed with multiple stress spinal fractures.
I ended up in a back brace for 6 months of the year (before and after spinal surgery), I basically didn’t attend school that year and I was banned from sport until September 2006. I spent my days at home watching ready steady cook and whose line is it anyway?.
I look back and realise everything I missed out on (including a guy who decided not to pursue anything with me because of my injury – jerk!!!) but at the time I was actually ok with it because after years of pain, doctors and physios I was finally on track to getting better. Plus I was allowed to go to my formal without my back brace even though I still had 3 months of wearing it to go!
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This is me right now! I have 3 kids and work full time. Last week my husband was away for work so I was extra busy. On Thursday night I felt really tired and achy but put it down to my hard week. Friday morning I dragged myself out of bed got my boys off to school and daycare then drove myself to work in the city. It wasn’t until I was sitting at my desk shivering with a fever that I realised I was sick and had to go home! Somehow I got myself home and into bed and have been there ever since. My Mum came and picked up my boys and took them home with her. My husband finally arrived home late Friday night. I don’t remember when I have ever been so sick! I don’t have any choice not to stay in bed as I don’t have the strength to get up and do the housework etc that I know is piling up!
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Lani – I totally get where you are coming from, I had planned major surgery earlier this year and very much unlike me had complications (I don’t get complications!) Losing the ability to bounce back and beat the estimated time for recovery shocked me. I guess we are all human. Good luck with your recovery.
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2010 – my first year of full time work,a 22 yr old brimming with energy. all that came crashing down on the 23rd of december when, while at a specialists (endo) appointment my thyroid made a rather dramatic dive from hyper/over active (hence the energy/high metabolism) to seriously hypo/under active (diagnosed as hashimotos disease). luckily that it turned on that day, i was able to get the medication i needed immediately.
i spent christmas – new years – early january in a fog, sleeping 20 hours a day. thank goodness for my doctors seeing the change as it was occurring, as alot of hashimoto’s patients live for years without the change being picked up, losing memory, weight gain, fatigue etc.
dec 2010 taught me to slow down, and i’m still learning how to do that.
after going back to uni for my masters in 2011, i pushed it too far again, and spent another (why is it always?) christmas in a fog 2011/2012 with post viral fatigue
i’m working on lifestyle factors (diet, light exercise, sleep) but am still constantly confused and battling with what is best for my body. but hell, did i get over my body image issues fast when i learnt about my hashimotos! seemed so peripheral all the sudden
edit: oh yeah, and then there was that time last year i spent 6 hours having seizures on a plane (syd-lon) – emergency landing in bankok – 3 days in hospital with low blood electrolytes – wish i would learn my lesson already!
slow down!
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I agree completely. Anyone can be replaced in any job – a well functioning healthy body cannot be taken for granted nor restored to full health if it’s abused …
Oh and ps. I think those news stories are broken instantaneously …..
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I had Glandular Fever last year but was misdiagnosed for so long that I ended up pushing through and failing a subject at uni and then felt the effects of it all year…. THEN when I was finally over it and doing a 2 month trip through Thailand and Europe, I got Whooping Cough!! I wasn’t really able to rest then either…
Be glad that you have the opportunity to rest, because if you don’t, glandular in particular can have a lot of long-term effects.
Get well soon
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I was driving to work everything in my life was perfect I was getting married, we had a house a dog life was at it’s best! Suddenly I was hit at high speed by a young driver. I haven’t been to work since, I have spinal, neck, hip injuries, migraines, neck spasms. We had to move back with my parents it doesnt look like I can do the career of my choice again and the worst of it is been going on for 18 months! I can’t drive myself around and what gets me down the most is we can’t have children yet due to my injuries! And the other driver didnt even get a fine! Life can change in the flash of an eye, in just a millisecond and I’m lucky to be alive and to be walking! Never take anything for granted!
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Wow Rachel, that’s pretty full on. Were you able to get married on time? Will you recover ok? Gosh. Thinking of you.
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I was determined to get married I hobbled down the aisle had a walking stick at our wedding a wheel chair at the air port on our honeymoon! Injuries are permanent I will get better to a certain degree but nothing like I was before! I can only lift 5kg I can’t even lift my nephew! Thanks for your concern i have a gluten free food blog and would love to write a more detailed article on here trying to get young drivers to slow down. Maybe you could run that by Mia? I’ve had glandular fever and it’s not nice, just think of my who needs a hand showering or walking at times! Take care and get better soon!
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Hi Rachel
wow – good for you for sounding so positive. Seems like things are very challenging.
I am not sure why, but it seems you might think I’m part of the MM team? I wish! I’m just another reader/commenter. However I think your idea is a great one for an article. I suggest you email lana (lana@mamamia.com.au) and run it by her. Best of luck!
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Thanks for your support I find staying positive is what gets me through even when things seem horrible I think of someone worse off then me! I guess as your column was up here I thought you were a writer for mamma Mia but thanks I will email her it’s something that isn’t publicized enough! Take care of yourself and thanks for the tip! Xx
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Hmm, I wonder if my name is coming up incorrectly or something. I’ve never written a column!
I agree vehemently re getting drivers to be more sensible.
Great work re staying positive – it’s a life skill!
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That was my mistake I made an assumption! Sorry what is your twitter tag I would love to chat to you. Particularly as we both communicate by twitter! Thanks for everything! I couldn’t reply on the last comment that’s why I’ve done it here.
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Ok, now I know there’s something weird going on with my login as I’ve never used twitter!
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I have epilepsy and it is very well controlled, generally a seizure indicared to me it is time to slow down, a hospitalization signals time to reassess and see where maybe I could change things in my life where I’m stressing unnecessarily.
However it was in 2011 when the biggest lesson came. I was working in an important Government office and it was a very busy time for us and I was doing the work of more than one and I had been sick and body just shut down and I went into status epilepticus and spent a week in intensive care.
I know this is an EXTREME case but for me it was definitely a wake up call that I need to listen to my body better. So far I haven’t required hospitalization for a seizure since then, so think I’ve definitely learnt an important lesson.
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Hi Anna,
Me too! Although my epilepsy isn’t very well controlled by medication. Anything more than one or two seizures in any one day means I need to de-stress, relax and de-brief (usually I chat to the dog when I’m taking him for a walk).
Most other people would think I’m just having a whinge or that I can’t hack real life, but when the little things pile up on the worry list, I can end up collapsing in the street. And it’s been only recently, after one such hospitalization, that I was forced to look at my life and how I handle it.
So far, so good, but then again, it has only taken me twenty-odd years to figure this out.
I guess that in this day and age, putting yourself first can be seen as being selfish. And that admitting to being stressed out is a sign of weakness. I know I thought that. I admit this was a mistake.
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I think your phrase ‘can’t hack real life’ is excellent to describe prevailing attitudes. There is a common perception that if we’re not trying to juggle a million things that we are not trying hard enough at what everyone else is doing. In a busy modern life, your post is really comforting – it validates the ‘take time to relax’ approach to life! Thanks
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No worries Vaniat
I feel really strongly about this, and it’s so encouraging to read everyone’s responses. It truly is uplifting knowing there are people who know what it’s like!
But it can, at times, be a lonely place to be in when you’re having to take it easy and everyone else is going a million miles an hour. I think what I’m trying to say is stay strong, be true to what’s right for you and take care of yourself
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“can’t hack real life”
This is exactly the attitude so many healthy people have when it comes to chronic illness they can’t see.
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Yes, in my experience that has been the response. Even those closest to me have shown frustration at what they perceived to be weakness or deliberate laziness. Except from my Mum and Dad – and I’m forever grateful for their patience, their care and their understanding. Especially when I’ve needed someone else to be strong for me.
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I’m glad you’ve got your parents “on your side” – I have a chronic illness too and wouldn’t have gotten through the past few years without my folks either. It makes me feel like a bit of a brat to say it but most people just don’t ‘get it’ – I think it sucks that we live in a society where putting your health first is seen as selfish! At the end of the day we can only do what we can do, rest of the world be damned.
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This: http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory-written-by-christine-miserandino/ is the best description I’ve ever seen of how to explain a chronic illness. My friends and I refer all the time to running out of spoons.
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