Comments on: Would you follow your partner overseas?

By: Edel

Edel — Tue, 09 Apr 2013 13:18:21 +0000

Meg your experience sounds limited and maybe holds traces of envy? Many expat experiences do indeed have financial/career incentive – why do it otherwise? I take exception to your remarks particularly the idea that expats do not give back to their temporary community or treat people that work for them badly. The accent remark is just plain silly. The women or men who are brave enough to accompany their spouses overseas are strong flexible people, We gain experience for a lifetime and offer our children the opportunity to learn from experience – oh and if you do a little research you will find that those you take the time to really listen to someone with an accent often unconsciously mimic it – assimilating into the environment can be part of making it work. I can only hope you are more supportive to your sister in person than here.

By: Madhu

Madhu — Fri, 23 Nov 2012 09:32:41 +0000

Kristy, Its amazing how life is sometimes, here I was agonising over the DP visa work permit challenges( we all know that one dont we?), and I read this and it brought a teary smile on:).
Its also amazing how after 2 postings of “trailing” , and doing the whole struggle all over again, and sometimes not able to win the struggle on finding work, sometimes I still look out of the window of my very nice place and wonder ” what in the world …how did i get here …??”
Your article gave me a sense of inner peace (albiet for a little while , but it was good, thank you for writing , pls do go on. It does make a difference….
And here I go looking for that mythical flexi job again
cheers

By: s-yeo

s-yeo — Mon, 22 Oct 2012 13:50:34 +0000

I know this is an older post but I lived in Singapore for 4yrs & am in now in Pretoria, South Africa, I am an expat wife who’s managed to find work in both places- my biggest piece of advice is manage expectations- you won’t find a job or the salary you had back home easily, networking plays a HUGE part of it. I don’t have kids so it’s harder to meet people without school stuff- I can give you heaps of recommendations on decent hairdressers in Singapore & highly recommend websites such as “meetup” and ” Inter Nations” I’ve made heaps of friends this way & experience local life rather than the pool side house cleaner, country club stereotype & it is an ideal situation to learn new hobbies or try & start your own business, at first I struggled with my sense of identity as I was there for my spouse & in Singapore you can’t open your bank account or have a mobile phone without your husbands permission to set it up ( was fine once I got a job) but that really upset me that effectively in their eyes I was “his possession” rental prices are $$$$$ but after GFC we lived on sentosa for half the price before, but what you pay would get you a house in toorak with staff lol it’s nuts!! I found the expat click very designer, keeping up with jones & was a bit of a pariah because i wasn’t procreating, I stopped attending BBQ’s after all the ” oh someone’s not pregnant” because I’d be drinking a glass of wine!! I have however made some incredible friends & some have already made the trip to Africa to visit, but at first I felt I had to socialize with anyone & thought I was too picky as I wanted the friendships I left behind, and its hard to find but I did eventually, Singapore is a very expat place & therefore people come & go all the time, it can be hard to put time into relationships & then of a sudden your new friends leave. Jo’burg on other hand – there’s have & have nots, no one cares about the latest balenciaga or chanel, as long as you can Braai (BBQ) and like the outdoors it’s a fab place, nothing like the media makes out! When I told my family I was moving to south africa my dad said after our orientation trip ” they just show you the nice bits so you sign the contract then its welcome to hell!” In my opinion its like living in the wild wild west, so much promise but with an air of danger, don’t get me wrong you have to be aware but you can shop, dine out & live for the most part like you would in Aus, just don’t leave your bag on the car seat next to you or drive through Hillbrow. anyway enough banter if any would be expats want to know where to go in Singers just email theblondepony@theblondepony.co.za or twitter @prettyponysy Good Luck it is so worth taking the chance!! Cheers Sarah PS for Singapore their chemists although numerous are rubbish, cold & flu stuff doesn’t exist & after several broken bones the strongest pain relief is panadine lol (maybe I am just a weakling though)

By: Max_in_Sydney

Max_in_Sydney — Mon, 22 Oct 2012 06:55:18 +0000

I’ve just got back to Aus after a three year stint as a trailing spouse in Dubai. I was able to get good work there myself forftunately, after a fair bit of blood, sweat and tears with the local beauracracy. It’s very true how you describe the moment you inwardly rejoice when hearing an Aussie accent accross a room or in a crowd of work aquaintences. And don’t forget the single women who are living and working as expats too. They can be a huge support as I learned first hand in my hour of need. To those who find themselves alone in the hotel room or the new house/apartment…make the effort to get out and meet others. The people who tend to be unhappy and lonely are often those who sit at home saying “poor me”. Everyone is a little shy, but if you make the effort to say hello and ask a couple of questions about someone else, you can make a friend for life. Or at least for the time you’re in that country.

By: Nousha

Nousha — Sat, 13 Oct 2012 14:41:20 +0000

How true and how well described! I’ve been expat most of my life, and I can hardly share this here in Denmark (home becuause of spouse)!

By: Helena Fiers

Helena Fiers — Wed, 03 Oct 2012 20:23:23 +0000

Being a Belgian (with Polish roots) living in Denmark, moving to Seattle… I found your comment funny but I do wonder, what are timtams? Is that really Belgian?? ) Is the international school perhaps near Wilanow? My cousin works there. Powodzenie w Warszawie (good luck in Warsaw)

By: PrincessMary#2

PrincessMary#2 — Wed, 03 Oct 2012 18:57:15 +0000

DKmum, I think we are referred to as ‘love refugees’ which sounds so romantic… I am an Australian who followed my husband to Denmark (18 weeks pregnant with a 15 month old baby in tow at the time)! I am also envious of the expat experience, we are expected to immediately integrate with the new society rather than have our own community. Perhaps we just need to start our own community to rival the expats, there must be more than enough of us around the world these days! I have some great stories about crazy foreign mother-in-laws I could share…

By: willa

willa — Sun, 23 Sep 2012 10:55:37 +0000

Thanks for posting that link Kirsty, I’m excited to connect with other TCK’s!!

By: Jos

Jos — Sat, 22 Sep 2012 05:49:44 +0000

Mine was when my husband was offered the job he had been chasing for 18 years! Husband, wife, miss 5 and mr 3 packed up our life in australia for the humidity of Hong Kong. Many positives and many issues back home to keep dealing with. Lucky it is only a 9 hour flight away!

By: vicki henden

vicki henden — Fri, 21 Sep 2012 11:46:21 +0000

go for it girl, enjoy the feeing of self worth