I am a planner. I like to know what’s happening in advance and I like to prepare for it. So if I am aware of a function or important date my internal diary freak switches up a notch. I start to think about my hair – do I need to get it cut or coloured? Should I book a fake tan? What should I wear? Will it be cold or rainy? which will look daggier – my umbrella or drenched hair?
But there is one event that takes greater planning than most others and it doesn’t involve a single hair appointment, actually cancel that, it doesn’t involve a hairdressing appointment.
My visit to the gynae is meticulously planned.
1. I always take a spare pair of undies. Fresh, pretty undies that I keep in my bag to change into just before I set off to my appointment. For the life of me I cannot figure out why I do this because the first thing the doctor does is ask me to go into a room (where he can’t see me) and take OFF my undies and put on a gown. I always then fold my knickers into the tiniest possible swatch of material and hide them under my clothes. So he never sees them. But still they have to be pretty. And fresh.
2. I also make sure that I have clean shaven legs. I can guarantee you that he does not look at my legs so why I don’t make sure that they are clean shaven when I go to the beach I am not quite sure.
3. For some reason I like to have my toe nails painted. Don’t even ask
4. And then there is my er, area of interest as it were. A recent news poll survey revealed that 97% of women undertake some sort of personal grooming, whether it is a bikini line wax, trim or Brazilian, before they have a pap smear.
So I am not alone.
I can’t imagine many more jobs that I would dislike more than being a gynaecologist. At least an obstetrician gets to deliver babies but a gynae? He just, well he just looks at women’s vaginas all day.
Is this why women “prep” before getting their pap? To provide a better view? Or are they self conscious? Do they believe that the doctor could be judging their hairstyling, their maintenance, the way their vagina looks?
I am sure my doctor has seen quite some different sights. Some hairy, some not, some innies, some outies, some young and some very old – not the most “scenic” job in my opinion. But at least 97% of the women he sees are groomed. And I am sure he doesn’t even notice.
How do you prepare for a visit to the gynaecologist? Do you groom? Take fresh clothes?
Comments
227 Comments so far
Did you know that ladies can be gynos these days? Actually, modern ladies can be all sorts of doctors, and we can vote too!
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I don’t have pap smears, I don’t need them, and I am not concerned that I will contract a very rare gynecological cancer. What does concern me is that so many women like yourselves actually believe you need to have them done. Think outside the herd mentality for a moment and go and do a little research, there’s so much evidence to suggest that more harm is being done in over screening and the subsequent treatment for false positives than lives saved for this rare cancer.
Ask yourselves why do I believe this is helping me? And if you need to appeal to authority then side step your doc and have a look at peer reviewed papers on this risks of cervical screening (references on request). Don’t just rely on your doctor, they may not be informed of the risks themselves, those of you that work in the medical profession have ready access to these papers so do yourself and favor and weigh up the risks and benefits make an informed decision, so not only can you help yourself, you’ll be in a position to enlighten your patients and maybe avoid exposing them to more unnecessary trauma.
Also I am not coming from a position of radical conspiracy theories and a cosmic woo woo diatribe, I study bioethics and respect science and also find comfort in a scientific analysis of preventative healthcare, the pap screening programs are not necessarily established on evidence based science, it could be argued that these programs are sustained to protect the investments of various institutions that need the pap smear program to continue to maintain funding.
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Incredible though to think 95% of women don’t need pap tests at all and are being tested unnecessarily. Our program is more than a decade behind the evidence. The Dutch and Finns are the ones to watch here, they have put women first – our program has not been properly monitored and is now harmful and excessive.
The Dutch and Finns are offered 7 pap tests, 5 yearly from 30 to 60 and the Finns have the lowest rates of this rare cancer in the world and send the fewest women for biopsies/treatments. Over-screening greatly increases the risks of a false positive and over-treatment for no additional benefit, but the science has moved on and the Dutch are about to change their program (along with other countries gearing up the same way) – women will be offered 5 hrHPV primary triage tests at 30, 35, 40, 50 and 60 and ONLY those positive and at risk will be offered a 5 yearly pap test. Those negative are not at risk and will be offered the remaining 4 HPV tests or if monogamous or no longer sexually active can forget all testing and revisit the subject if their risk profile changes. Only 5% of women are HPV positive and at risk at age 30 (I thought the age was 40, but a friend recently found a Australian medical journal reference that stated the 5% figure applies at age 30)
Sadly, women under 30 don’t benefit from pap testing, it doesn’t change the tiny death rate and HPV testing is not recommended either – the virus is more common in young woman who almost always clear it within a year or two. Pap testing also produces high false positives results in women under 30 and very high under 25 – 1 in 3.
The Dutch program will further reduce pap testing, excess biopsies and over-treatment (and that means fewer women with damage to the cervix – fewer premature babies, fewer women with cervical stenosis, infertility, high risk pregnancies, requiring c-sections etc) and is more likely to prevent these rare cancers – pap testing misses 50% of adenocarcinoma and 25% of squamous cell – HPV testing consistently picks up 98% of high grade lesions, the pap 50% to a high of 80%. Our program is a dinosaur, but generates vast profits for the medical profession – we have one of the highest over-treatment rates in the world – lifetime risk – 77% for a cancer with a 0.65% lifetime risk.
The Dutch also have a reliable self-test option for HPV – the Delphi Screener. It was recently introduced into Singapore and several other countries.
Women should demand smarter testing that better protects ALL women – those women who are HPV negative and not at risk AND the 5% who carry a small risk from this cancer – this group can now be easily identified.
A review of our program has only just started even though there were calls for urgent change going back more than 10 years – it’s shameful and at this point VERY concerning – we need a full and independent enquiry into this program – it is not operating in the interests of women.
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This is slightly off topic, but I’m reminded of it by all the women posting below who accidentally wiped glitter on their privates whilst freshening up (how glamourous and pretty!)
One morning my male housemate came downstairs looking a bit guilty and shifty. He asked “hey, is that stuff in the white bottle moisturiser?”, and I said “No, it’s a gradual tanner. Why?” He replied “I noticed you haven’t used it for months so I thought it was abandoned moisteriser, so I thought I’d use it…” He then held up his hand, which was orange/brown and said “it turns out, you shouldn’t use fake tan as a wanking aid. Lesson learned”.
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I nearly spat out my drink over that one! Bahahahahaha!
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I must say the idea of ‘pretty’ knickers to impress the doctor is slightly disturbing. Although I realise it’s probably not about him – as you say, he doesn’t even see them – there must be something else going on in your subconscious.
As others have said, good hygiene is just polite in such a situation, but any more than that is not necessary. Doctors are supposed to see you when you’re vulnerable. For you to have to dress up to see any kind of healthcare worker adds extra stress that I personally don’t need in my life. It’s bad enough out in the street or at social functions.
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Hehe, not that people see anything like that at social functions…You know what I mean.
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I know this fantastic probably urban legend story although was apparently one of the teachers at the school my Mum taught at. She had an appointment but lived close by so ducked home to give herself a quick wipe down before the appointment. The doctor didn’t say anything but there was something slightly unusual about his demenour, so when she got up to dress, she checked. She had used the face washer with which she had previously removed her daughter’s glitter dance makeup – thereby giving the doctor a sparkly show. Going back into his office she explained and he did say it was a first for him.
Personally I aim for a morning appointment, but really, they must see everything all the time, I don’t worry too much.
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Does anyone else find it strange how going to a gyno is an awkward experience but when i sleep with a guy for the first time im not nervous about him seeing down there.
anyone else like that?
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Boy some people are so worked up. Don’t take things so personally!!! I too am like Lana and am paranoid about personal grooming when I go to the Gynie. Not that any of them care though! My friend is a midwife and she said she doesn’t take any notice unless they are really putrid (poor hygiene and dirty). I was so paranoid when I was pregnant I went in at 39 weeks and had a brazilian. Now I have known pain but this was a whole new dimension of pain. With all that blood flow down there the heightened sensitivity was enormous and it was by far the most painful thing I have ever experienced. My friend said she would have been thankful had she been my midwife as I ended up having a caesar so no need for any shaving! I am most paranoid about cleanliness and make sure my appointment is first thing in the morning or sometime I can shower right before I go.
I actually really appreciated this article. It made me feel like I was not the only weirdo who was paranoid about these things! Thanks Lana!
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I would book an appointment early in the day so I could be freshly showered, but that’s about it.
I must say though, I do have my regular female GP at my local medical centre for everything ‘above the belt’, so to speak. For anything ‘below the belt’, e.g Pap tests, I would visit another female doctor at the centre that I am unlikely to run into again. I wonder if anyone else dose this?
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Wow people are getting so fired up about this! Really?!
Personally I don’t do any of what Lana has described because I’m lazy and don’t care quite enough! But I TOTALLY understand why people do because let’s face it, having strangers stare at your fanny is AWKWARD!
Interesting the male/female debate, I personally always have female doctors because I’m old fashioned and go red talking about contraception let alone vagina issues but I do find men to be more caring. Having said that after I had my daughter I had two men down there doing god knows what and I was chatting away happy as anything, gotta love those new baby hormones!
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Just had to share this for all those people who thought getting a pap smear was bad..
Last week I went into hospital to have a cervical suture (or cervical stitch).. It’s where a doctor gets a needle and thread and literally stitches your cervix together and then pulls it like a drawstring so it stays closed.. Talk about painful!
Not only that, I am 13 weeks pregnant and when I had the surgery last week (at 12 weeks pregnant) there was a chance that the needle could puncture the amniotic sack and I could loose the baby (luckily all went well!)
So.. Next time you have a pap smear consider yourself lucky that your doctor only had a giant cotton bud and not a 6cm needle in his/her hands!
(I had to have this surgery after having a stillborn baby at 22 weeks last year, the stitch is supposed to keep baby inside until full term.. Fingers crossed!)
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Good luck!
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i have a friend that also had the stich done and she has the most beautiful baby girl… godd luck to you:)
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Yes my friend had the stitch as she had an “incomplete cervix?!?” whatever that is- but she gave birth to a beautiful baby boy so hopefully you will do the same.
Good luck xx
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I’m sorry for your loss. We lost our son at 17 weeks for the same reason, so I had a stitch just like yours for my daughter who is now nearly one. I’m sure you will be fine! It’s worth it
)
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Hope all goes well Kate!
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Good luck Kate. Fingers crossed for you.
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Not to start on a whole new topic but…I was once running late from work to get to my beautician for my monthly brazillian. I was only able to go to the toilet and give what I thought was a proper good wipe. When I got to my appointment and she had nearly finished waxing, she hesitated and then started pulling at something. Turns out that I gave too good of a wipe and I had left a line of toilet paper wedged up there – horrified!
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Hilarious, good on you for having the courage to write and tell us all about it.
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I have honestly never thought this hard about it! I just go, get it done, finish my conultation and leave. I have a female doctor, but my first ever pap smear was with a male doctor and it didn’t phase me any more than a first-time pap would. I was anxious about the actual procedure, but not that it was a man doing it – I’m of the mind that any doctor, whether male, female, straight, gay whatever, doesn’t really care about my bits unless there’s something wrong with them that could threaten my life.
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With a gurney ;P
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Whoops- gynaes can be female! I’ve had 2 female ones & one male over time. I don’t know many people who obsess about visiting the gynae (or GP for a Pap smear). I just make sure I’ve had my shower & maybe that I’m not too furry, so bits don’t get tangled around the doc’s gloves!! As for undies- who cares? If they’re still in the undie drawer they’re presentable. Get over it girls!!
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apart from the normal routine cleaning “down there”,that I do everyday, I treat it like any other visit to the Dr. Why do you go to a gynae for a simple routine pap smear when a GP can do it. The only pap smears done by my gynae were the ones I had after the birth of my children.
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I used to get quite a flare up on my skin from waxing. The only comment my GP has ever made when discussing bikini and brazillian waxing is “Gawd, why would you bother?”
She was one of the many people who put my perspective back down to earth about the whole thing.
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I don’t find pal smears uncomfy after 2 children…used to be so modest too
what I was recently horrified about was having family doc whom we all love, look at a haemarroid. Thanks pregnancy! Ghastly. Now next kiddie sniffle I’m not sure how I’ll look him in the eye. But I know of course, he doesn’t care!
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I know what you mean! Slightly off-topic, but this reminds me of the bag I packed to take to the labour ward, just shy of 3 years ago. 3 sets of pyjamas to labour in – nothing fancy, nothing that needed fancy washing or would make ‘access’ difficult, but definitely wanting to ‘preserve modesty’! Ha! A few days later, it suddenly struck me that since I’d started in the shower, and with an attempted water birth, I’d actually not bothered with clothing when we were changing tack, but had just gotten on with it! “Hang on – did I actually give birth naked? And not care? And no one else did either? Oh… well… OK, then!”
Wondering what I’ll be packing for the hospital this May, for the birth of number 2… I’ve got a feeling there’ll be less stuff in that bag! (although I’ll probably still over-pack, as I always have for every holiday of my life!)
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I work for a GP who does a lot of routine pap tests for our patients – she said she has only had to leave the room twice, and definitely expects a basic level of hygiene. She does have a giggle with the patient when they “freshen up” with baby/talcum powder. It’s unfortunate in our area that there only 1/6 obgyn’s is actually a woman, as many women prefer to see a woman obgyn for their first appointment should they need to be referred, but the male obgyn’s have a great reputation, a lot of experience and 2 of them deliver many many babies at the local hospital.
Thanks for posting your thoughts Lana – and I’m sorry that a few people thought you were silly for prepping – Mum always told me to shower before the appointment and wear a skirt but I always tie the appointment in with my wax, or around the same time. Whatever makes me feel comfy for a slightly uncomfy consultation!
I think there is nothing wrong with doing any sort of prep before going, especially when the GP/obgyn has to look at so many of them during the course of their day!
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I book my appointment for a day when I don’t have my periods. That is all.
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doing paps is part of my job- all of the above is really wasting time- we are looking to see if you are healthy down there. we dont breathe deeply whilst we r there or compare you to others
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Im just wondering how many of us are going to be searching the shelves in Coles looking for fem fresh now!
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Don’t ever, ever, ever use a ‘feminine deodorant’ product.
Vaginas are self-cleaning.
Using harsh chemicals in your vagina upsets its very delicate pH balance, which in turn leads to uncomfortable conditions such as thrush (yeast infection).
Vaginas only smell bad when there is something wrong with them. And in that case, you’ve got bigger problems to address than odour.
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Why does a man become a gynocologist?: http://womenagainststirrups.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=questionnaire&action=display&thread=39
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“a strong subconscious motivation for many men who choose
gynecology as a specialty is the “need to be in a powerful and controlling
relationship with women.”
Says who? What crap. How offensive. The idea a man can’t do the job is bunk. There is a chance a female doctor has a slight advantage in being able to say ‘hey, I have experienced/felt this myself, looks familiar’ but that is only a tiny advantage because what are the chances of a female doctor having experienced all the myriad problems a woman can face? As a 26 year old female I have had zero female problems, not even painful periods. I wasn’t born knowing stuff about my vagina because I have one. If I went to med school the guy next to me would have pretty much the same knowledge. Or he would catch up damn quick on what I know. And if that guy got way better marks than me I would rather be his patient than mine. Any ‘extra’ personal knowledge a woman has can easily be combated with educated, experience and training.
If the knowledge argument doesn’t hold then what? It comes down to sexist assumptions of ‘doctor manner’. The referenced article talks about ‘empathy’. Is it not sexist to say women are more empathetic as doctors? A good male doctor can be empathetic. A bad female doctor can be rude and dismissive. Gender has nothing to do with it. Imagine the uproar if I said I want to see a male doctor because I think he will be more reasoned and logical.
See the best person for the job. See who suits you. Gender is irrelevant.
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I have a male GP who is really lovely and sympathetic to any problems I have. I saw a female doc in the same practice for my first couple of Pap Smears but she wasn’t all that thorough I felt and I didn’t really like her that much (as a doctor). So now I see my male GP for my Pap’s and couldn’t be happier.
I figure doctors see all sorts of things every day and learn about male and femal parts so it is just a part of the job. It would be like suggesting males shouldn’t feel comfortable seeing a female about a penis problem.
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Probably because the hours can be pretty family unfriendly and there aren’t many options for completing the long training on a part time basis, unfortunately! Most gynaes are also working as obstetricians. All are also trained in obstetrics.
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In all truthfullness I have never “prepped” other than basic cleanliness for a gyn exam. I figure by the time the GP/Gyn specialist has gotten to the point where they are in a medical practise that they have seen scores more worrying spectacles pertaining to lady bits(infections/STDs/trauma) that my boring old garden variety unkempt vag doesn’t even rate a second thought.
Maybe childbirth desensitised me – when you have an OB manually reaching in and helping dilate you that last centimetre mid-contraction after 10 hours of labour – well, lets just say Pap smears are a walk in the park, and my vag will look forever perky ‘n’ perfect compared to THAT moment!!!!!
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Many years ago I booked in with a new doctor for my first ever Pap smear – I was quite nervous and showered and scrubbed to be sure I was fresh and clean as possible – then in walked the doctor who was a very good looking man only about 10 years older than me. He ended up having a bit of trouble and said it was because I was “very vascular” ?? What ? I was horrified and embarrassed and had no idea what to do or say or what it even meant. This was way before the internet and Dr Google so I had to eventually ask a nurse friend what he meant -turns out it’s just good blood flow with large veins
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My other doctor (male) said that women ‘ran away and hid from him’ in the supermarket when he was shopping, because they assumed that because he was their doctor, he was ‘thinking about’ or ‘diagnosing’ their problems. He said to me, that in reality, he didn’t recognise his patients without their medical charts. Nice bloke, happily married with kids who gives me that ‘oh, who are you?’ smile when I smile at him when I see him in the real world. It’s a job. Aren’t we lucky that he views his job to his personal life as different!
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Why are there so many women getting referrals to a gynae specialist? This article makes out like it’s normal but I’ve never been.
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For me it’s mainly been in relation to vaginal tearing from giving birth. I’m fairly sure it was a gynaecologist who stitched me up, and then I had to have a check up with another gynae a couple of months later.
I’ve also seen one to put in an IUD, and when I had an ovarian cyst which needed to be operated on.
For general stuff like pap smears, the GP is probably the easiest and cheapest option.
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Abnormal pap smear results for me. Had to get precancerous cells removed. After that, though, you have to go back for a few checkups with the specialist to make sure everything’s OK.
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Simple. I dont want the GP I take my kids to when they have gastro or the one I see when I have tonsilitis looking at my privates. My Ob/Gyn is the only Dr for that job! And once going there for that I have noticed a big difference in comfort. He does them all day every day so he has it down to a fine art
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Many many years ago I worked as a check out chick at a large supermarket chain to pay my way through Uni. One of my fellow checkout chicks’ (let’s call her Nicky) mum (let’s call her Tina) used to shop at our store all the time. Tina was a very introverted, shy woman. One day Nicky came in in hysterics. Tina had been to a regular gynae appointment. She came home and said to Nicky that the gynae (let’s call him Gynae) said something really odd and she didn’t know what to make of it. Nicky asked her what Gynae had said. Tina replied, he said “gee, you’ve gone to a lot of trouble haven’t you?” Apparently he said it twice. Nicky asked Tina what she had done. Tina, very troubled, said she had done nothing unusual. She’d had a shower, used some of Nicky’s feminine deoderant spray, de-furred her bikini line, and worn clean underwear. Nicky was in paroxysms of laughter. She didn’t own any feminine deoderant spray.
It was blue glitter hairspray.
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Thank you, Chellebelle, as your story brought tears to my eyes! What a funny story, and you can only imagine the look on the doctor’s face as he was confronted by blue glitter! It is so nice to have a laugh!
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I have heard this one before! Is it an urban myth? Or is it really too easy to mistake the “feminine hygiene spray (is that for real?) with glitter (blue!) spray??? Seriously, who uses blue glitter spray anywhere???
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I’ve heard it come back to me too since then, as an urban legend. The details have stayed remarkably accurate. I swear it happened. It would have been some time around 1989-1991. Yep – there was a feminine deoderant spray back then. I’ve never used one so I have no idea if they still exist. And I swear on a stack of bibles that the story is true. I know the woman personally. She knew that her daughter told us girls at work and she was so embarrassed she couldn’t look us in the eye for weeks. She was *mortified*. I guess sometimes these urban legends are based in reality!
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Isnt it funny now 3 women on this site have the same story to tell translating the exactly same urban myth happening to them or their friend with exactly the same response from the doctor. ‘ Gee you didnt have to go to all that effort… Hmmmm
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Why feel the need to write your comment when it didn’t even happen? It’s urban myth.
http://urbanlegends.about.com/od/sex/a/glitter_spray.htm
*rolls eyes*
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You can roll your eyes all you like, but it’s true. My story wasn’t San Francisco, it was Karridale in WA. It wasn’t orange spray, it was blue, and the doctor said something different. I don’t know why I’m trying to justify myself. I don’t care if no-one believes me – I know it truly happened, I know the woman personally whom it happened to, and it’s a bloody funny story.
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An oldie but a goodie.
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I love Snopes and I’m all for identify ‘it happened to this person I knew…’ stories as urban legends.
But on this one I believe some of the women in this thread. I had a sparkly soap once that looks like a normal cream soap. My boyfriend used it and didn’t realise until I pointed it out that he had light sparkles on him. He had gone all day like that. Sparkle mishaps happen.
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My mum used my “moisturiser” once. It was fake tan. These thing do happen.
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I am rolling my eyes too
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Lol!!!!
The funniest!!!!
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A bit different but it reminded me of when my brother pinched my nair hair remover thinking it was hair moose and used it in his gorgeous hair. Very funny!!!!
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After having ovarian cancer Im religious about my check ups and pap smears. I shower before I go and thats it. Im not there to look pretty and my GYNO sure as sugar is not thinking about how my vagina looks, in fact last visit we were talking about Footy tipping and his new grandson. Women of the world for love of goodness just get your pap smears and if you do groom good for you but please stop shraing this shit, NO ONES CARES BUT YOU.
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Or you could have stopped reading instead of writing a bitchy post about how much you don’t care? Perhaps some readers don’t care about what you discussed with your gyno at your last visit, but they simply skimmed over it, or clicked on another article.
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I’m a little different… I usually have brazilians, but before an examination I won’t wax it, I just trim the hair. I think maybe its because both my GP and gynae are in their 50′s and for whatever reason I think that being from my mother’s generation (she would never have a brazilian) they will judge me as a tart for having one. Even though I realise every other woman now has a brazilian and they probably don’t give it a second thought.
But… after 10 years of brazilians and ingrowns I finally took the plunge and have started getting it all lasered off. So I had better get over that mentality pretty quickly!
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Have had it all laser off ( along with legs, arms, underarms).
Best decision ever!!
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What is it with stories about vaginas and waxing that get women so fired up? Hilarious!!!
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Oh dear. As a doctor working in Obstetrics AND Gynaecology. I can tell you, I don’t really care. And I don’t think that 97% figure reflects the patients that I see. Vaginas come in all shapes and sizes and hair-distributions. Please, please stop stressing. A stressed patient makes for an uncomfortable pap smear (for you!).
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Thanks for this. Just as I thought!
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I don’t wax or shave anything… one article here on MM promotes leaving vagina’s alone and highlights censorship and the photo shopping labia’s and then this?
weird. doctors really don’t give a crap.
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I get vajazalled so I sparkle
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I am just like Lana… I like cutesy knickers . One pair I wear after a fresh shower & the other pair for changing into after my examination. I like to exfoliate beforehand, wax the day before & spray done some fem fresh just so I am ready for my appointment. I too just like Lana like to fold my cutesy knickers into small squares. Then off I skip to my appointment knowing I am fresh & wearing cutesy knickers.
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Oh great, one more thing women have to worry about. Grooming my privates. Fantastic. Because, you know, I have all the time in the world to do that.
Do you think men worry about this sort of thing before a prostate exam?
I know this is a personal opinion piece, but really – Mia, I’m talking to you – you’re the publisher of this site and I thought you were all about promoting healthy body images for women.
Choosing to publish one neurotic woman’s personal thoughts about pubic grooming just feeds into our collective, neurotic, body-obsessed consciousness.
Surely we’ve got better things to think (and worry about) than this mindless drivel.
I’m really, really disappointed.
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Well if Lana makes ‘one neurotic woman’ then I make two. Actually I don’t think grooming when I know I’ll have an audience is neurotic or that it promotes an unhealthy body image. I brush the hair on my head when I know people will see my face too.
Thanks for the post Lana, and thanks to Mia too for providing a site that covers everything from Kony to front Kabooses.
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Well said Phillybaby!!
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Hi Fed Up,
I’m genuinely sorry you’re disappointed.
But here’s the thing. Just because something should be so, just because we should all be confident and chilled enough to walz into our doctor’s office and spread ‘em, doesn’t make it true for everyone.
Beacuse some of us are not.
And the thing with Mamamia is that we give people the space and the respect to voice their feelings and opinions and their secret thoughts.
Or inner dialogues.
We don’t tell women how to feel or what to do.
Let’s leave that to women’s mags and self-help books – which certainly have their place but this is a different forum.
I LOVE hearing from people who think the same as me (like in this post where Lana expresses so many of the same thoughts I have when I go to the gyno, including the folding the undies and hiding them! After choosing nice ones!) and I love just as much hearing views that are totally different to mine.
The point of MM is about a diversity of opinion. And sometimes about saying “WHY do I do this weird thing? Does anyone else do it?”
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Just a little heads up Mia. Next time you go to the Gynae, probably best not to wear your new pineapple undies with the words “Bite Me” on your butt. Oh, unless of course you fancy your Gynae terribly and…you know…you want him/her to bite you. Then I guess wearing the pineapple undies would actually be a good thing. I guess…
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The thing is, the post was written by the editor of this site. So whether you like it or not, this kind of attitude is endorsed and “normalised” by you and your website. More so when you confess to sharing the same fears.
What you don’t realise is that many women (like me!) now think they’re in the minority if they don’t “groom” their vulva for a doctor’s appointment.
To be honest, the thought of wearing new knickers and shaving/waxing/hair removal for a DOCTOR had never crossed my mind before now.
Now I’ll never approach a pap smear in the same way ever again. Thanks for that!
It’s kind of sad when you think that I’m now ashamed of my natural “hairy” self and my “normal” everyday knickers.
So much for being a fun and fearless female…
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I too am sorry you feel so awful about this.
I’m certainly not telling you that my way is the right way and I don’t expect you to change the way you approach a doctors visit. I am only telling you the way I do it.
Surely my experience is as valid as yours even if it’s not the same. I love to be challenged in the way I think and do things but I’m not sure why I should be attacked just because I do things differently to you
All respect
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Hi Lana,
Thanks for the post. I’m all for doing whatever makes you feel comfortable to get through a pap test!
There’s just one part of your post I’m not loving – what news poll has 97% of us doing pre-pap grooming? Until I went back through all the comments I was getting worried I was being a heathen by only showering beforehand! It sounds like a much more even mix in the Mamamia commenters. Any chance this could be noted as part of the article? So us heathens don’t have to feel so… erm, feral?
Cheers!
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I don’t think that the 97% means that all those women are waxing or shaving or even thinking about pubic hair – grooming also extends to washing… So I think bearing that in mind 97% seems to make a lot more sense
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Fed up.
I’m concerned that an opinion piece could make you ashamed. That you feel you are no longer fun and fearless.
I’m genuinely concerned and would recommend you talk with a professional.
An opinion piece should not cause you to view yourself in this manner, should not have such a big influence on you.
Please delve into what in your past has allowed you to be so fluid in thought.
It might help you to deal with other articles and pressures in the future.
Good luck. I wish you the best.
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Fed up,
Why don’t you just vote with your mouse and click off.
I appreciate the diverse range of topics offered by this site. Not every story is for everyone.
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That’s true, but I really wanted to address Mia about what she chooses to publish.
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I’m not sure what the problem is. No one is saying you should groom. Why are you reading into this an instruction? It’s just one woman sharing that she does worry about presentation – something that many other women worry about too for their appointments. No value judgements are made. If anything it’s pointed out the doctor doesn’t care and it’s all in our heads.
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On the contrary “Fed up”….. one woman’s ‘neurotic-ness’ makes me feel less alone with my own quirks and perks. We all have things about us that are a little odd, don’t we? I always feel so much better knowing that everyone else has their “things” too. It might not be lady grooming… it might be a penchant for purple post-its or an obsessive need to buy every concealer you find which you then never use…
I feel that mamamia is about a community of people who don’t judge each other for having body issues (as if having the issues isn’t bad enough – now we get in trouble for having them at all?), but helps us all feel more connected because, essentially, we’re all a bit “same same but different”.
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I loved the way Lana wrote this, I was nodding my head laughing away to myself. Thinking yep, yep! its just a bit light hearted funny topic that really no one likes to do! lighten up a bit fed up! We are all in the same boat why not have a little joke about something so uncomfortable.
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Do most women regularly go to a gynaecologist? I thought since they are a specialist you’d only go if there was a problem that your GP couldn’t handle and needed expertise ? I have never been to one.
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Me neither! That was my first thought too. Mine seems to be working ok; best leave well enough alone.
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I only go to the GP too
Perfectly normal (and cheaper!) than a specialist unless you have further issues.
While my papsmears continue to come back clear it’s GP all the way for me!
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The last time I went for a pap test was the last time I went for a pap test.
Sorry if that sounds bonkers – but my test was abnormal which led to a colposcopy which was inconclusive which led to a cone biopsy which almost led to my death by uncontrollable bleeding.
I believe we’re over tested for paps – other countries test every 5 years (Finland for example). Cervical cancer is very slow to develop.
Anyhow….I digress. As I found out later, the fact that I Brazilian regularly was helpful in the emergecy hysterectomy which saved my life. No need to shave. So who said Brizzies were self-indulgent?
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But the sooner you catch cervical cancer the better? My last pap was abnormal so I am now on yearly pap tests. Why would you wait for it to get possibly worse??
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I believe we are over tested – as I found out after I dutifully reported for my colposcopy followed by an unnecessary surgery that cauterised half my cervix and left me at death’s door.
As I found out later – this sort of uncontrolled bleeding is not uncommon in a cone biopsy. Was I told about this possibility? No.
And at the end of all this – the path results after the hysterectomy came back clear.
I’m sure there are others on here who are more qualified to comment on the how regularly we need paps. But from the reading I’ve done and evidence from other countries, we are one of the most over-tested countries in the western world. Women in Finland (and the UK too, I believe) are not dying of cervical cancer any faster than we are in this country and they’re tested way less often.
I was not ready to lose my reproductive capacity for absolutely nothing. I believe my test was alarmist – I should have been re-tested in say, six months rather than having all those invasive procedures.
This is my experience. I’m not a doctor, surgeon, pathologist. I’m simply stating my opinion.
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That is certainly one hell of a traumatic experience! Interesting to hear your thoughts!
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Thank goodness it’s only your opinion and not fact or recommendation because that over testing you’re talking about saves hundreds of lives each year and 2 of those are my sister and a dear friend. The routine testing didn’t save her from cancer or hysterectomy or chemo but it did give her a chance at beating it. Testing is there for a good reason we are the lucky country having services like this to give us a layer of protection against cruel disease.
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I like that this is being discussed, because a pap smear saved my life.
I’d had an irregular pap and was told to come back in 12 months instead of 2 years as it was probably an infection.
Six months later I didn’t feel right in myself and had ‘a feeling’ I should another another pap. Sure enough, I had CIN 4, had two double wire letz procedures and two colposcopies which failed to reach all the cancer, and had a hysterectomy which saved my life.
The lesson in that for me was to always listen to my body and that little voice in my head or heart.
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Sorry this happened to you. I doubt it is is a *common* outcome of a minor procedure ..
But there are thousands of women out there who are alive because of two yearly pap smears.
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Here in the UK we are tested every 3 years and if you have abnormal smear, another is taken 6 months later, if that too is abnormal then further tests are done. After 2 consecutive abnormal smears you are then subject to annual smears for 5 years.
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Thanks for deleting my post MM. Nothing offensive but questioned if this is what MM is reducing themselves to these days – obviously nothing else to write about!
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I hide my penis every time I go to my gynaecologist.
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BAHAHA just spat out my tea…
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Iam a nurse and can guarantee that the only private parts you remember are the ones that are very, very out of the ordinary. always hated the old pap smear, but one GP I went to used to go to made it a bit better, she would wear one of those head lights with the big bands and always looked like she was about to go mining for coal, hilarious!!
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Hahahaha! That’s hilarious. My first thought upon seeing that would have been “Jesus, what sort of cave does she think she’s looking into!?!?”
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I’d die if she sent in the canary…
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I only discovered AFTER ten years of fertility/pregnancy issues that most other people do this stuff. So I asked my ob at my 6 week appt how she felt about my a la natural (legs, bush, the lot) and how common I was. She said that less than 5% of her patients remove no hair at all (I love being special
but that she usually only ‘notices’ the ones who have their pubes in amazing shapes (hearts etc). She said she always tells them there will be no time for that after they have a baby!!
One thing she did say was, “Danielle, when you were sitting here sobbing after your 5th miscarriage, do you really think any doctor would be thinking about your pubes in that situation. I’m interested in what is up there and how it works (or doesn’t), not what it looks like.”
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Slightly off topic but does anyone else find the term ‘pap smear’ icky? I always refer to ‘pap test’ instead of ‘pap smear’. I think the word smear sounds slightly grubby and haphazard.
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In the pathology lab the sampled cells are ‘smeared’ onto a glass slide and stained with PAPanicolaou stain.
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I’m not saying it isn’t medically correct; just that I personally hate the word smear. Like panties, moist and other shudder words. Why name a procedure after the procedure that happens after the cells are collected?
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I could not agree more on the two words ‘moist’ and ‘panties’….
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Ugh! Thank you for adding ‘smear’ to my list.
I too, find the words “moist” and “panties”, gag worthy. And now that you’ve pointed it out, “smear” really is just as gross.
I wonder though… what would a shrink say about our cringing disgust, at words that are all associated with our lady parts?
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Can I add ‘pussy’ to that list? I hate it. It’s so 1970′s porno. But lots of guys I’ve met love it.
As for shrinks, I think they would understand it’s not about the object (your underwear, your vagina) in question. Different words for the same thing can carry vastly different connotations and contexts.
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Another “lady parts” word that makes me shudder: ‘discharge’
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ewwwww….
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My mum used to call it a grease and oil change!
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For everyone having a go a Lana for “grooming”.
Watching “The Doctors” the other day and the OB/GYN said you SHOULD be groomed as they needed to be able to actually see the skin of you vulva to know what your “normal” skin is, so they can keep an eye on any changes.
She said it doesn’t need to be brazillian but a trim to stop is being totally out of control is helpful to her.
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And as for using a female over a male- I’ve seen 1 female GP complain in print that “just because I’m a woman doesn’t mean I want to give you a pap smear”
And I’ve had a female GP counter my request for a pap smear by asking if I could come back at another time and see another Dr for that.
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“just because I’m a woman doesn’t mean I want to give you a pap smear”
I get where that person is coming from but I find it precious. My usual GP is a man, I’ve been with him since I was a baby. I do not feel comfortable having a pap test with him. I would hope a female GP would be understanding of this.
Anyway, at my GP’s they now have a dedicated female medical professional (not sure if they are a doctor or nurse or what) who does things like pap tests almost exclusively for the clinic. I bet she sees so many lady parts before lunch they all blur together!
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That annoys me. I’m in my mid-20s and I’ve never had a reason to see a gynaecologist – and I’m sure there are a lot of other people in a similar position. Pap smears are unpleasant, so it’s already an effort to force yourself to have one without GPs making you feel awkward about asking for one.
I can’t help but feel that sort of comment is counter-productive to the public health campaign to get women screened for cervical cancer regularly.
PS: obviously I mean the doctors you described annoy me, not what you wrote!
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My mum told me as a teenager to always wear a skirt of dress to the doctor/gynae. That way you don’t have to actually take anything off except your undies. There’s no bare bum on show as you get on and off the bed etc.
Best advice ever thanks mum!
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Oh Lana this is fab and I could so relate. Numerous IVF procedures mean I spend alot of time in the stirrups and I ALWAYS have to have a fresh paint of toe nail polish on. Makes me feel like I have some control of what’s going on. I once had one foot painted pink (for girls) and the other blue (for boys). Thought it might have been a good omen. It was for a procedure that I had an anaesthetic for so goodness knows what the doctors/nurse thought of it!
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this made me giggle, lana… i agree with you and i am the same and see no problem with it whatsoever… i also brush and floss my teeth before the dentist and GASP even been caught cleaning before the cleaner comes!! we are all a bit crazy, but hey, each to their own… do what makes you feel good cause i know i do it because it makes me feel more comfortable and i reckon you’d agree with me
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Now the brushing and flossing bit, I agree with! I definitely do that, ’cause my Dad encouraged it. Or at least the brushing. Probably inclined to use mouthwash too. I find I’m less prone to colds and sore throats if I use mouthwash, so presumably these viruses find refuge in my throat if I haven’t used mouthwash. I really shouldn’t be breathing these bugs all over my dentist and the surgery IMO, even if he does use a mask and sterilise everything.
But I would certainly put that in the category of hygiene, while I don’t think of waxing and Brazilians as being necessary for hygiene. To be sure, I would wash thoroughly with warm water in the shower that morning, and possibly consider a moist wipe. But I also have great respect for a healthy vagina as a self-cleaning organ, to which I can do more harm than good if I’m not careful. I think I’ve used moistened fem fresh wipes, although not for many years, but since you can’t control where the spray does and doesn’t go precisely, I wouldn’t use a spray.
TMI?
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Lana, a lot of gynae’s are qualified obstetricians too and will have both a gynae theatre list at the local hospital as well as a selection of pregnant women.
Pregnancy aside, I’ve never seen a gynae for, well, anything.
I do love your ritual, kinda like the old brush your teeth before the dentist one. I did make sure I was tidy “down there” when I nearly at the end of each pregnancy.
A friend of mine from years ago, used the excuse of sex the previous night to get out of a pap smear. I repeatedly tried to convince her the doctor wouldn’t care (shed previously had CIN 2), but she still wouldn’t do it. I sometimes wonder if she ever did.
Some people are being very harsh here. Does it matter to you if it makes someone feel more comfortable to be clean and “groomed”? Lana is right, her doctor probably doesn’t care, but some people are not clean at all and the odors that come from them can be offensive.
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oh we must have been typing this at the same time just posted something very similar above
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Thanks Faybian. My gynae does not do obstetrics which is a pity because I would have loved him to deliver my baby. But i have had a lot of gynae problems so have a really good relationship with him – and I love your analogy about the dentist because you should see me at the dentist – I take my toothbrush, dental floss, toothpaste and mouth wash with me and I use the bathroom in his (yes he is also a man) rooms to clean my teeth before I even walk in to his office
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Meh. I have better things to devote my time to than caring what my GP thinks of my vag. It’s done in five minutes, they see it all the time, who cares? Lordy.
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Quick question – how many of us make sure their teeth are brushed immediately before they go to the dentist? I do, and pretty much everyone I know does as well…don’t think pre-pap prep is any different to doing that!
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I went to the GP recently to get a script, and she noticed I was due for a Pap smear. So it was done, with no preparation and no big deal. I’m a doctor too, and let me tell you: WE DON’T CARE. (Although basic hygiene is certainly appreciated, and unfortunately, often lacking.)
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My papsmears are generally sprung on me by the GP when I’m there for something else (they notice I’m due and suggest we get it over and done with there and then).
Definitely the best way for me! No anticipation or worry and it’s all over in a flash, not to be thought of for another 2 years
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I get a reminder text for mine. Gaarh !
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